


The Way of the Apartment Manager

by Elizabeth Culmer (edenfalling)



Series: The Way of the Apartment Manager [1]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Adopted Sibling Relationship, Adorable, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canon-Typical Violence, Chuunin Exams, Families of Choice, Fluff, Gen, Healing, Heartwarming, Inspirational Speeches, Pre-Canon, Team Bonding, Teamwork, Warm and Fuzzy Feelings, Worldbuilding, finding your dreams again
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-12-28
Updated: 2005-10-26
Packaged: 2018-01-07 12:54:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 18
Words: 71,971
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1120050
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/edenfalling/pseuds/Elizabeth%20Culmer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ayakawa Yukiko retired from being a ninja, and she's come to terms with that. Then the Third Hokage summons her for an assignment that will change her life. AU story, set six years pre-manga.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> "The Way of the Apartment Manager" was the first _Naruto_ story I wrote, and was something of an accident. I never meant to fall into a new fandom, and I thought I was writing a short one-shot. Then I thought I could finish the story in 7 chapters. Obviously I fail outline estimates forever. *wry*
> 
> In any case, this is an AU story. In the canon timeline, I am pretending that Yukiko was one of the nameless people who died during the Kyuubi's attack... but in this story she lives. And everything changes.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter the First, in which Yukiko meets a demon, the Third Hokage is blithely manipulative, Naruto doesn't actually manage to douse people with buckets of water, and the author drives herself slightly crazy trying to sketch architectural blueprints of an apartment building.

This, Ayakawa Yukiko thought, staring blankly at the scowling, blond boy in front of her, was not what she'd expected from a summons to the Third Hokage.

She hadn't really been a ninja for years, and even then she'd never been more than a genin; her ninjutsu was terrible, her taijutsu wasn't much better, and genjutsu alone didn't get you very far if you couldn't get out of the way when enemies broke your illusions. But she was still technically available for missions and she'd thought that somebody might have been desperate enough to want a washed-up illusionist.

Being summoned because of her _other_ job -- managing the apartment building she'd inherited -- had never crossed her mind.

"I have a one-room efficiency with an attached bathroom available, Hokage-sama," Yukiko said slowly. She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, trying to control her hands and look nonchalant despite being shut in a small room with both the Hokage and a demon. "It's on the top floor, in the back, and it catches the wind during storms, but the insulation is up to code and the appliances work. The bathroom's tiny, but I don't think that'll be a problem." She eyed the blond boy again. He was so small to be a demon, and yet...

"Good," the Hokage said. "He'll move in tomorrow. I'll have the orphans' fund transfer payments to you, which should cover his rent and food. Thank you, Yukiko-san."

The boy's scowl deepened, stretching the whisker marks on his face. Yukiko suppressed a shiver, suddenly wishing she still carried more than two hidden kunai. He's sealed, she told herself. He can't hurt you as long as he's sealed.

"She doesn't like me," the boy said. "I don't want to live with her."

The Hokage sighed. "You won't be living _with_ her, Naruto, just in the same building. You're getting your own apartment. Didn't you tell me just last week that you wanted to leave Midori-san's house?"

"Yeah, yeah, but I still don't like her!" The boy pointed at Yukiko, blue eyes narrowed. "She's just like everyone else. I bet she turns off the heat in my room like Midori-san does."

Yukiko scowled back at him. "I don't play favorites. If you pay the rent, you get the same services as everyone else, whether I like you or not." And whether you're a demon or not. She might not be much of a ninja, but she still had her pride.

"So, so, you won't turn off the heat, and forget to unlock my door, and tell me dinner's an hour after it really is?"

Yukiko looked sidelong at the Hokage. Even if the boy was the demon who'd nearly destroyed Konoha, the village of Hidden Leaf, couldn't the old man have found someone a little less vindictive to care for him while he was in this body? And while he was at it, couldn't he have explained the difference between living under somebody's care and living on your own?

"When you have your own apartment, you have your own keys," she told the boy. "I _can't_ lock you out. And you'll have to make your own meals, so you get to decide when to eat. All I do is make sure you have water, heat, and electricity, and repair any major problems. If something breaks down normally, I'll fix it. But!" she added, frowning at his sudden grin, "if it breaks because you did something stupid, that's your own problem. So don't jump on the bed and then complain to me when it cracks."

The boy scrunched up his face, pondering.

"Well, Naruto?" the Hokage asked. "Do you still want to leave Midori-san?"

"Yeah!" the boy decided. He thrust his hand out toward Yukiko. "And I'm gonna be the best person you've ever had in your apartments! Can I have my keys?"

Yukiko smiled despite herself, but nodded rather than risk shaking the boy's hand. "Not now. Hokage-sama will bring you to the building tomorrow and you'll get them then. Is three o'clock good?"

The Hokage nodded. "Yes. Thank you again, Yukiko-san. Naruto, please return to Midori-san; she's waiting outside my office. I'll see you again tomorrow."

The boy grimaced and stuck out his tongue, but obediently trudged out the door.

The Hokage watched him go with a small smile, and then turned back to Yukiko. "Yukiko-san, you were a shinobi, correct?"

She nodded. "Yes. I never passed the chuunin exam, but I'm still decent at genjutsu. Why?" A sudden thought struck her. "Is he dangerous? I know he's sealed, but what if--"

"No." The Hokage held up his hand firmly. "Uzumaki Naruto is _not_ dangerous. And he is _not_ the Kyuubi. The fox is sealed within him, true, but Naruto himself is as human as any other six year old boy." He sighed. "I'd hoped people would let go of their hatred over the years, but it seems that nobody bothers to watch him closely enough to see him for himself."

He fixed Yukiko with a stern look. "I came to you for his apartment because I knew you were a ninja. You understand duty, and how duty comes above personal likes and dislikes. I'm not asking you to like Naruto, but I will hold you to your claim of impartial service. Consider this a mission, if you like; you'll be paid extra along with his rent."

 _What?_ "I may not have been much use as a ninja," Yukiko began, feeling her voice rise despite herself, "but I have honor. I've agreed to rent him an apartment. End of story. Don't you dare insult me by making it a mission and paying me extra as if I'd try to weasel out!

"I don't care if he's the Kyuubi or not; if I say he gets the apartment and fair treatment, he gets the apartment and fair treatment. That's a promise, and I don't go back on my word!"

The Hokage smiled, and Yukiko suddenly realized that she was leaning over his desk, hands planted on the stacks of papers and a snarl on her face. She was yelling at the Third Hokage! What was she _thinking?_ Any second now guards would pop in from nowhere and drag her away to interrogation...

The Hokage was smiling.

Yukiko blinked.

"I'm sorry about that, Yukiko-san, but I needed to make sure," he said. "As you may have realized, Midori-san can be somewhat... inconsiderate... of Naruto, and I hoped to avoid that sort of problem in his new home. I will bring him by at three tomorrow. And yet again, thank you for agreeing to this."

The Hokage motioned toward the door, and after an embarrassed bow, Yukiko left.

\---------------

It was nearly three. Yukiko had spent the morning dusting the tiny, top-floor apartment, patching cracks in the plaster, and scrubbing the bathroom with bleach. She didn't normally go to all that effort for new tenants, but she didn't want to give the Hokage a bad impression after her promise yesterday. Besides, there was no telling just how secure the boy's seal was, and she'd really rather not deal with an offended demon. She trusted the old man -- he was Sarutobi-sama, teacher of the legendary Three, chosen two separate times as the Hokage of Konoha! -- but still, better safe than sorry.

There. She'd spotted three figures walking down the street -- the Hokage, a masked Anbu guard carrying several packages, and the fox-boy, who was skipping and running excitedly around the two ninja. Yukiko straightened her old forehead-protector, which she'd dusted off and used to pull her hair back from her face. She might not be much of a shinobi, but she had managed to graduate from the academy and pass the final exam her old jounin-sensei had set her team, and she felt a need to visibly remind the Hokage of that.

"Good afternoon, Yukiko-san," the Hokage called.

She bowed and was about to return the greeting when the boy barreled up to her. "Hi, Yukiko-san! Can I have my keys now? Hey, hey, this is a really tall building -- do I really live all the way on the top floor? Can you see the Hokage monument from my apartment?"

Yukiko suppressed a grin and made a few surreptitious seals behind her back before reaching into the pockets of her windbreaker. "Keys? Well, if you can guess which hand they're in, I'll give them to you."

She held out her hands, both apparently empty.

The boy's face fell. "I knew you'd be like everyone else. You don't have any keys!"

This time she smiled openly. "Oh, really? Watch!" She snapped her fingers, releasing the genjutsu and letting the keys appear in her right hand. "There! One set of keys for you -- don't lose them!"

"Wow! That was so cool! Was that ninpou? You're a ninja? I didn't know you were a ninja. I'm gonna be a ninja too! Can you show me how to do that?"

The boy, Yukiko thought with a wince, was certainly as _loud_ as any other six year old boy, and he talked just as fast as the other children in her building. Maybe he really was as safe as the Hokage seemed to think... but she'd wait and see, just to be careful.

"You need a bit more regular school before you can pass the ninja academy entrance tests, Naruto," the Hokage said. "For now, let's follow Yukiko-san to your new apartment."

Yukiko led them to the door. "Okay. You have three keys. One is for the building entrance -- it only opens this door, not the back door, so don't try to get in that way. The next is for your mailbox -- that's the really small key. And the third is for your apartment itself -- that's the key with the round head instead of the square head. So, which key unlocks this door?"

The boy squinted at the key ring, tongue stuck between his teeth in concentration, and then held out the square-headed key. "This one!"

"Right. Why don't you unlock the door and let us in?"

"Cool!" The boy unlocked the door with minimal fiddling, and Yukiko led the small party into the lobby of her building.

"This is an old building so I don't have a full-service elevator. There are two sets of stairs. This set goes to the front apartments, and down that hallway is a set that leads to the back apartments. That doesn't matter for most of the floors, but the last two floors are divided by a small courtyard for the water towers. So you'll have to take the back stairs."

They walked up to the top floor, and Yukiko pointed out which of the four doors led to the boy's new apartment. "That's your new home, Naruto," the Hokage said. "So... will you invite us in?"

The boy cocked his head, eyes twinkling. "Hmm... nope! Hehehe."

"Naruto..."

"Yeah, yeah, just kidding! Come in, old man, Yukiko-san, creepy guy with the mask."

Yukiko snickered at the Anbu's startled posture before following the boy into his new apartment. "It's all one room," she said, "except for the bathroom. Bed's over there, kitchen along this wall, and that end of the room is for whatever you want to put there. You have a range, an oven, a microwave, and a refrigerator. If you need to clean, I have mops, brooms, and one vacuum cleaner in the storage closet next to my office, but you'll have to buy your own soap. I think that's everything."

The boy looked around the tiny apartment with an expression of awe. "This is all mine?"

Yukiko had a feeling that he hadn't heard a word of her spiel. "Yes, it's all yours."

"My own kitchen. My own bathroom. My own closet. Wow. And a real bed, not just a futon." He was quieter than she'd yet heard him, not scowling or grinning, just looking around as if he wasn't sure he was really awake.

A single-room apartment shouldn't be that special to anyone. Yukiko glared subtly at the Hokage. Demon fox or no demon fox, no six year old boy should be this excited to have his own bed. No boy should _want_ to live on his own at that age either, rather than let someone else take care of him.

"Well then," the Hokage said, blithely ignoring her glare, "I'll leave you here, Naruto, and let you put away the things Midori-san gave you. Someone will stop by this evening with some food to get you started in the kitchen. Thank you again, Yukiko-san."

The Anbu dropped his packages on the mattress and followed the Hokage out, his posture speaking of contempt and relief. Yukiko frowned. They expected a civilian boy to know how to set up a room, make his bed, and cook his own meals?

"Hey, kid," she said.

He frowned at her. "Yeah?"

"Do you know how to cook?"

He looked embarrassed. "Um..."

Yukiko leaned back and beat her head against the doorframe. Maybe she should have taken the extra pay -- she couldn't let any of her tenants starve, and she was sure cooking lessons weren't part of her normal rent charges.

"Naruto, right?" she asked. The boy nodded. "Okay. There's a buzzer that will sound when somebody is here for you -- you'll have to go downstairs and let them in. When someone comes by with food this evening, come to my office and I'll teach you how to cook."

"Really? Cool!" The boy dashed over and hugged her. "Thanks, Yukiko-san! I promise I'll be your best tenant ever! And when I'm a ninja, I'll make sure nobody ever knocks your building down."

Yukiko looked down at his arms around her waist, and blinked. What exactly had she gotten herself into?

\---------------

One handy thing about being a ninja, even a failed ninja, was knowing how to set tripwires. When the penholder on her desk quivered, Yukiko glanced at the mirror in the ceiling corner and groaned.

"Kid, put the bucket down."

The fox-boy, Naruto, pouted. "Hey, hey, Yukiko-san, how'd you know it was me? Is that a ninja thing? Midori-san never caught me, not even when I dyed her hair purple! Hehehe."

Never caught him? Dyed her hair purple? Oh, no. She hadn't just rented an apartment to the demon fox; she'd rented an apartment to a practical joker. And he seemed to have decided that she was his new target. How was she going to deal with _this?_

"Yes, it's a ninja thing," she said. "And because I caught you, we're going to set up some rules right now. First of all, you see all these papers?" She pointed at her desk.

Naruto nodded.

"Okay. These are very important papers. Now, I don't care if you get my clothes wet or do anything that's easy to fix -- it serves me right if I can't see you coming -- but if you got the papers wet, the ink would run and that's _not_ easy to fix. And I'd be _very_ angry. So, first rule: think before you play a joke on me, kid, and make sure it's harmless."

The boy scrunched his face up as if thinking was a painful chore. "I guess so, Yukiko-san."

"Good. Second rule: don't play jokes on any of the other tenants. I don't mind but they probably will. And third rule: don't do anything to public areas like the lobby and the stairs. That's almost like playing jokes on the other tenants, since they have to use those areas as well."

"But that's boring!"

Yukiko shrugged. "Tough. That's just how it is. But let's make a deal." She crouched down to his level and caught his eyes; they were a clear, open blue, not at all what she'd expected from a demon... or someone holding a demon, she added, remembering the Hokage's conviction. "You want to be a ninja, right?"

"Yeah! I'm gonna be the best ninja ever, and someday I'm gonna be Hokage! And then everyone will recognize me and stop being mean and yelling and stuff."

Oh. She hadn't realized people would actively bother him -- she'd mostly forgotten the fox-boy existed since he'd had no impact on her daily life, but apparently people he saw more often had longer memories than she did. And they didn't take him as he was now, or simply avoid him if they were uncomfortable; they must treat him as if he were still the Kyuubi in full attack. Yukiko frowned. That was unworthy of a hidden village. It was also cowardly; had they not believed the Fourth Hokage when he said he'd sealed the demon forever? He'd given his life in that fight. Did they think a Hokage would die for nothing?

"Well, kid," she said, "I don't know if you'll be Hokage, but you might make a decent ninja. Playing jokes on civilians won't teach you much, though -- they're too easy to surprise. But playing jokes on ninja will help you get sneaky and fast, and teach you to think around corners. I'm not much of a ninja, but I'm better than no one. So you leave my other tenants alone and I'll help you out, okay?"

Naruto's face lit up and he lunged forward to hug her. "Really? You're so cool, Yukiko-san!"

Cool? She, a wash-out genin, was cool? That was a new one. Nobody had thought her ninja skills were anything special since her parents died, since she'd given up her old dreams in order to manage their apartment building, since her teammates died when she wasn't there to watch their backs...

Bad thoughts, those. Think of something else. "Hey, kid, did anyone come by with your food yet?"

Naruto let go of her waist and grinned. "Yeah! I was gonna just tell you, but I thought it'd be more fun to surprise you first."

"Huh. Kid, you're something else. Let me give you a little advice: if you want people to be nice to you, it's not a good idea to play jokes on them first. That usually makes people angry, and then they won't want to help."

Naruto's eyes widened. "There are people who'd _want_ to help me?"

What on earth was wrong with this village, Yukiko wondered. How could people go out of their way to be cruel to a face so hurt and hopeful? Yes, maybe it was just a mask over a demon... but then wouldn't it be a good idea not to make the demon angry? If people were kind, then even if the Kyuubi broke free someday it might not hurt the ones who'd cared for it. That was basic strategy, right out of the academy books. Right now, though, it sounded like the boy had nothing tying him to Konoha except the Third Hokage.

"Well, I'm helping you and I'm a person, aren't I?" she said.

"Yeah, yeah, but you're special, Yukiko-san."

Yukiko blinked. "...Oh. Thanks, kid. Let's go start that cooking lesson." And get out of this conversation. Special? Her? This kid was even more mixed up than she'd thought.

\---------------

The Hokage looked up from his paperwork as Yukiko stormed into his office. "Ah, Ayakawa Yukiko-san. You're a little early for your appointment."

"I don't care," Yukiko hissed, slamming her hands down on the edge of his desk. "I want to know what on earth you were _thinking_ , letting that kid live on his own. He's six years old! He can't cook, can't clean, can't manage money... are you trying to get him killed?"

The Hokage blinked. "Hmm. It's that bad? Naruto promised me that he already knew how to cook and that he'd learn the rest within a week."

"What he knows how to 'cook' -- and I use the term loosely -- is instant ramen. Period. I've tried teaching him other dishes for a week now, and he's come _this_ close to burning water. He can barely even make salad, and then he refuses to eat it because 'vegetables are yucky.'" Yukiko glared at the old man. "I don't have time to watch over him all day, not to mention it's not my job, but I'm not having any of my tenants starve to death or bury themselves in filth. There is no way that kid can keep living in my building.

"This was your idea. Fix it." Yukiko realized she'd been yelling at the Hokage again, and flushed. "Please," she added.

The Hokage ignored her for several seconds, signing his name to a scroll, sealing it, and handing it to a chuunin he called in from outside. Then he turned back to Yukiko. "Hmm. Perhaps you should have accepted the extra pay, since Naruto is demanding more of your time than your other tenants. He thinks very highly of you, by the way; it was all he spoke of the last time I saw him."

Yukiko folded her arms and stared stonily across the Hokage's desk.

"There is also a slight problem in removing Naruto from your supervision," the Hokage continued. "Tani Midori refuses to take him back, and none of the other orphanages or foster homes are willing to care for him on an extended basis. If he leaves your building, I'm honestly not sure what will become of him."

Oh. "People hate him that much?"

"Some do. Others are simply worried about the effect he might have on their own social status. If a foster parent took him in, she might gain a reputation as a bad influence and lose the support of her neighbors." The Hokage sighed. "You haven't encountered that disapproval yet since you're not actively caring for him, but you may find yourself having trouble renting the other apartments on his floor. I apologize for that, Yukiko-san."

Yukiko thought silently for a minute. "You're saying that if he leaves, he won't have anywhere to go. Why can't you take him in yourself, Hokage-sama? You don't have any problem with him and nobody's going to question you."

The Hokage gestured aimlessly with his pipe. "You might be surprised about that, Yukiko-san. As Hokage I have great authority, but I live and work under corresponding restrictions. The people of Konoha must trust my judgment or the village will fall apart. If I associate too closely with Naruto, they will think I've been corrupted by the Kyuubi. As it is, I can pass off my interest as keeping an eye on him, but even now I'm walking close to the edge of what the people will tolerate."

Well, that was something she'd never thought about. Yukiko had always assumed that as the strongest and wisest ninja in Konoha, the Hokage could do whatever he wanted. Apparently he couldn't. His job sounded a lot like hers, actually, only instead of managing one building -- setting rules and fixing problems -- he managed the whole village. And there were limits to a manager's power, especially if the tenants all agreed on something.

"...You're saying that it's me or the streets, aren't you."

The Hokage nodded sadly. "Yes."

"Huh." Yukiko thought back over her past week with the fox-boy. He was loud, irritating, rash, and everything she disliked in a tenant. He was also desperately lonely, and more driven than she'd ever seen a kid that young, even the prodigies in the ninja academy. "He has no grasp of money whatsoever," she said. "I suppose I'll have to teach him about budgets, starting tomorrow. If he stops by my office for lessons, I can make sure he gets at least one decent meal each day."

"Then you'll let him stay?"

"I must be losing my mind, but yes. The kid can stay."

As she left the Hokage's office, Yukiko wondered what had come over her. She was willingly giving the demon fox a roof over its head. Not only that, she was helping keep its host alive, and teaching it to defeat ninja -- how else could she construe that deal over Naruto's practical jokes? And now she'd agreed to be something like a parent to a hyperactive six year old boy who'd probably drive away half her potential tenants because of what was sealed inside him.

"This really wasn't what I expected from my life. Really, really, really."

But she'd given her word. And while she wasn't much of a ninja anymore, that had been her nindo -- to never go back on her word. It was a point of honor that served her equally well in business deals.

She couldn't help thinking, though, that maybe this time she'd gotten in a bit over her head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Additional Note, 7/11/10:** I feel I ought to clarify a few points before anyone gets farther into the story.
> 
>  **1) THIS IS AN AU STORY.** (Apparently I cannot say that enough.) The idea is that in canon Yukiko is one of the many nameless victims of the Kyuubi's attack, but in this story she makes a slightly different choice and survives. When she meets Naruto six years later, things began to change. Events will not converge back to canon; in fact, in the sequel ("The Guardian in Spite of Herself") they spiral further away from the manga's path.
> 
>  **2)** A couple ages and implied dates are not in compliance with Kishimoto's official timeline. This is because I started writing before I knew there _were_ official timelines, so I guessed people's ages based on evidence from the manga itself and my knowledge of child developmental psychology. I was pretty accurate on Iruka's age (though apparently not on his promotion to chuunin?), but I assumed Kakashi was four or five years older than he is in canon. Normally I would go back and fix that, since I try to stay as canon-compliant as possible, but by the time anyone told me about the official timelines, Kakashi's age had become integral to the way the other characters interact with him and it would have been too much work to change. So that's another way the story is AU.
> 
>  **3)** Aside from those two points, if you see something that seems to clash with canon, it's probably because I wrote the story before Kishimoto revealed the point in question, because I screwed up, or because I didn't explain myself properly. Feel free to tell me. If it's one of the latter two options, I will try to fix the problem or make my reasoning clearer in-story. I probably won't do anything about the first option, though; I have limited time and energy, and that's not high on my priority list.
> 
>  **4)** Finally, lighten up! "The Way of the Apartment Manager" is, to borrow a phrase from TVTropes, all about Crowning Moments of Heartwarming -- interspersed with occasional action scenes and my personal obsession with world-building. Approach it from that perspective and we should all have maximum entertainment. Okay? Good. Now go read the rest of the story. :-)


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter the Second, in which we gloss over the months from autumn to spring, Yukiko thinks about her past, the author speculates on the Fourth Hokage's character, Iruka acts adorably harmless, the Third Hokage manipulates things again, and Naruto takes a stand.

"Hey, hey, Yukiko-san?"

Yukiko looked up from her desk, gladly setting aside the technical manual for the boiler she had to repair that afternoon. "Yeah, kid? And good work -- you avoided my tripwire." Of course, even after three months he hadn't realized that she'd rigged the floor tiles to squeak in particular patterns when people approached her doorway. She wasn't going to tell him, either, not until he'd had a good long time to figure it out for himself. She needed every advantage she could get.

Naruto grinned. "Hehehe, now I know where your wire is."

Yukiko grinned back. "And who says I won't move it as soon as you leave?"

"That's not fair!"

"Tough. That's how it is -- you think enemy ninja would just give up as soon as you find one trap? No, they'll set new ones. Never assume you've figured out all the tricks." Yukiko leaned back in her chair. "So why did you want to see me?"

Naruto looked down and stuffed his hands into the pockets of his new orange jumpsuit, which he'd fallen in love with and bought despite Yukiko's distaste for the eye-searing color. "You're a ninja, right, Yukiko-san?"

"Sort of, yes."

"So why don't you go on missions?"

Yukiko froze. That was touching too close to things she avoided thinking about. "Because I don't want to, kid. Now shoo. I have to get this boiler fixed by tonight."

"That's not an answer." Naruto scowled at her. "Come on, why don't you go on missions?"

"...I'm not a very good ninja," Yukiko said slowly, "so any missions I could take wouldn't pay very well. And if I went on missions all the time, there wouldn't be anyone to take care of this building."

That didn't seem to convince the boy. "But you could pay someone to watch the building. I could watch it! And I think you're a really good ninja!"

Yukiko sighed. "Kid, you haven't met many ninja, or at least you haven't seen what they can do. I'm only a genin -- that's the lowest rank you can have and still be an official Leaf-nin. And I like watching the building."

"No you don't," Naruto said. "You're always complaining about the tenants, and about repairing stuff, and about collecting rent." He stared accusingly at her, blue eyes narrowed and whisker marks seeming a shade darker than usual. "And if you don't think you're a good ninja, why don't you try to get better? That's what I'm gonna do! I'm gonna keep working until I'm the strongest ninja in Konoha! Until I'm Hokage! That's my dream and I won't ever give up.

"Wasn't being a ninja your dream?"

Yukiko closed her eyes rather than answer. Leave it to this boy to kick her right in the metaphorical teeth.

When she was his age, she'd spent months badgering her parents until they finally enrolled her in the ninja academy. Her clan had lived in Konoha for generations, but they'd never been fighters. They ran restaurants, built houses, sold clothes, and did all kinds of things that needed to be done in order to keep a village alive. She hadn't thought that was interesting, hadn't thought that was important enough.

"I want to be a ninja!" she'd told her mother. "I want to be the best ninja in Konoha so I can protect everyone. Our clan always builds things and fixes things -- I want to keep them from getting broken. That's my dream, to protect Konoha!"

She'd passed her graduation exam by the skin of her teeth, fortunate that they'd tested handheld weapon skills rather than her throwing accuracy. She'd struggled through the evaluation her jounin instructor set, corralling her teammates into forming a rough plan to overcome their survival training. She'd failed the chuunin exam on her first three attempts, but she'd gritted her teeth and vowed to work harder for the next one.

And then her parents had died. Not even in an attack, just caught outside during a windstorm and crushed by a falling tree.

There was nothing she could have done even if she'd been there -- her skills were in genjutsu, not in speed or strength, or in any ninjutsu that could have blasted the tree away.

What use was it to be a ninja if she couldn't even protect her family?

So Yukiko had set aside her forehead protector and taken over the apartment building in their honor. Konoha needed people to build and repair and maintain as well as people to fight. Konoha needed people to look after its residents during ordinary times as well as during danger. She was still protecting her village like she'd promised to do, still keeping her word. She'd just... changed her plan of attack.

Most days she didn't even miss the thrill of fighting, didn't miss testing herself against stronger opponents, didn't miss the heady rush when she sometimes won. She certainly didn't miss the boring missions assigned to most genin teams, the ones that had helped turn her team into a second family. And she didn't miss the warm certainty that she was helping Konoha, bringing money and prestige to her village and preparing to defend it if the worst happened. She didn't. She told herself that every week, and after a while she usually even believed it.

Actually, Yukiko recalled, looking at Naruto through barely open eyes, it was the Kyuubi that had finally ended her internal arguments over her decision, and had pounded her old dream into its grave once and for all. The demon fox had been so far beyond anything she could hope to match that she hadn't even bothered trying to fight. She'd ushered civilians into the caves for safety and laid illusions over the entrances, and she'd ferried the wounded and dead to the hospital and morgue, but she had stayed far away from the battlefields. Her teammates had died and Yukiko hadn't been there to watch their backs.

As with her parents, it wouldn't have done any good if she _had_ been there -- but how could she call herself a ninja if she hadn't even tried to help?

No, she was an apartment manager. It was better that way.

"My dreams are none of your business, kid, and I have my reasons for staying here," Yukiko said finally. "Trust me on this; it's better that I run the building instead of taking missions and letting people down."

"But--"

"Naruto. Drop it. We're not talking about that anymore, ever. Now shoo. I told you already, I have to fix the boiler."

\---------------

The Hokage was looking out his office window when the Anbu guard ushered Yukiko in for their monthly meeting. He waved her over without turning, and gestured down at the view of Konoha. "It's a lovely morning, wouldn't you say? I always find that spring refreshes my love for our village."

"Yes, Hokage-sama."

Now he turned slightly to face her as she hung back from his side. "You are allowed to call me Sarutobi, Yukiko-san. But how is Naruto doing these days?"

Yukiko shrugged. "He still can't cook much more than ramen, but I make sure he gets some more nutritious meals. I had some trouble keeping residents on his floor and the one below, but I lowered the prices a bit and filled them with new immigrants to Konoha, people who don't know about the Kyuubi. And the kid's decided that since I'm a ninja -- even though I'm a terrible ninja -- hanging around me will help him become one himself.

"In other words, he's a nuisance but he's fine."

The Hokage gestured with his pipe. "I believe I recall watching one of your chuunin exams, Yukiko-san. Why do you think you're a terrible shinobi? Your genjutsu skills struck me as remarkably subtle and precise, more than good enough for a chuunin."

The old man remembered watching her? Well, he _was_ Hokage, so he probably did need to know at least a little about all of his ninja. "I may be good at genjutsu, but that's all I'm good at," she said. "My taijutsu is basic at best and my ninjutsu is pathetic. Genjutsu alone didn't get me very far, and it isn't much good in a straight fight."

The Hokage smiled. "Since when has our business been about straight fights? I think you make a better shinobi than you realize. You're also a good teacher; the last few times Naruto has tried to surprise me, he's come much closer than before he met you."

Yukiko blinked. Teacher? Her?

"In any case," the Hokage continued, "I'm pleased to hear that Naruto is doing well and enjoying himself. I'm also pleased that you're helping him with his skills, if indirectly. He should be able to enter the academy this autumn. Since he doesn't have any family or friends to teach him the basics, I was afraid he'd be left behind. Now he should have a much smaller gap to overcome."

"Oh. Well, at least then someone will keep him out of my hair. He escapes from regular classes far too easily."

"Hmm. Yes, it's fascinating how stealthy he can be while wearing such attention-grabbing clothes," the Hokage mused.

Yukiko winced. "I tried to talk him into something blue, but he wouldn't listen."

"That's Naruto for you. I've only ever met one person more stubborn than he is."

"Who was that?"

"The Fourth Hokage."

Huh. Well, the Fourth _had_ famously refused to abandon Konoha during the Kyuubi's attack, insisting that there was a way to defeat the most powerful demon in the world. He'd found one, eventually, and then gone straight into battle despite knowing he'd have to sacrifice his own life to seal the fox. His determination was legendary.

"Are you sure determination is the same as pig-headed stubbornness?" Yukiko asked.

"Absolutely. The trick," the Third Hokage said, smiling, "is to know when to apply your determination and when to cut your losses. That's one lesson Naruto has yet to learn... although, to be completely fair I should add that the main difference between determination and foolish stubbornness is whether or not you win. If the Fourth hadn't been able to seal the Kyuubi, I'm sure the remnants of Konoha would even now be cursing him as a pig-headed fool."

"Huh." That was... an interesting way to look at village history. But not particularly relevant to Naruto's own behavior. "Well, he did win, thank goodness. Do you have any other questions about the kid, Hokage-sama?"

The Hokage shook his head. "So long as you're satisfied with his condition, I see no reason to worry, Yukiko-san. You're a shinobi of the Leaf; I trust you to keep your word."

"...Thank you, Hokage-sama."

Yukiko bowed and left the room, carefully suppressing her urge to scowl. Why did everyone keep harping on the fact that she was technically still a ninja? She hadn't done any good trying to fight, she was doing valuable work by providing housing for Konoha citizens, and she didn't want to go back to being a ninja. It was nothing but backbreaking work in return for failure, guilt, and heartache.

She was an apartment manager. Nothing more, nothing less.

\---------------

A week later, Yukiko found herself drifting over to the ninja academy, watching the terribly young students learn how to throw kunai and shuriken, to disguise themselves with genjutsu, to lay traps, to move untouched through minefields. They laughed and roughhoused like normal children instead of the miniature assassins they were becoming-- not that they were much good at the silent and invisible aspects, or had any real conception of death, but those would come on their own after a few years of bloodshed and brutal experience. The hidden villages had been at tentative peace for a decade now, and while battlefields offered easy moral choices and were forgiving of loud, flashy jutsu, peacetime missions favored stealth, cunning, discretion, and a firm grasp of situational ethics.

The last time she'd taken the chuunin exam, it had still been geared toward wartime conditions. She might do better now, when the villages would be looking for intelligence as much as brute power.

Yukiko shook her head. She wasn't a ninja anymore. She wasn't planning to take the upcoming chuunin exam. In fact, she wasn't certain why she'd come to the academy in the first place -- it did nothing but bring back awkward memories.

Hmm. A teenage boy was approaching her, walking just loud enough to be overheard. That was polite of him -- and also cautious; sneaking up on ninja wasn't the world's safest thing to do. But she _wasn't_ a ninja. Yukiko nervously touched her forehead protector, fighting the urge to rip it out of her hair. She'd found herself wearing the thing more often lately and she couldn't figure out why.

"Hello," the boy said, shifting on his feet with the faint awkwardness of someone who hadn't quite finished growing into his body. "Are you a parent or here on official business? If not, you need to be accompanied by academy staff while you're on the grounds. It's for the children's safety."

Yukiko shrugged. "I was just passing by, remembering old times. I'm Ayakawa Yukiko." She nodded her head, making sure her hands were in clear sight and visibly empty.

"Umino Iruka," the boy said, ducking his head and setting his ragged ponytail bobbing. His hands were empty too. "I'm an assistant teacher here."

"Really? You know, I have a tenant -- I manage an apartment building -- I have a tenant who'll be starting at the academy this autumn. Do you teach the beginning classes? Can you tell me what they're like these days?"

Iruka shrugged. "The basics never change -- there are only so many ways to throw weapons, after all. I don't teach, though; you have to be a chuunin to teach alone. I mostly help with live demonstrations and keep an eye on the children when they're outside."

Huh. From the suppressed longing in his voice, the boy wasn't thrilled with his role and would definitely prefer being a full-fledged teacher. "...The chuunin exam is coming up soon," Yukiko said. "I hear it will be in Konoha this year. Are you planning to take it?"

Iruka shrugged again. "My old teammates passed a couple years ago. I'd need new partners and I don't know where to find any."

Huh. Maybe she could be his partner...? No! Yukiko mentally slapped herself. No matter what Naruto and the Hokage thought, she wasn't a ninja anymore. She wasn't going to take the stupid chuunin exam. She didn't _want_ to take the exam.

"That's too bad. Maybe you should post a note at the mission center asking for partners," she suggested. "I'm sure there are other people who want to take the exam."

"Oh! I hadn't thought of that. Thanks, Yukiko-san!" Iruka glanced at his watch. "It was nice to meet you, but I need to get to a shuriken demonstration. Are you leaving now or should I walk you to the main office to get another staff member?"

"Don't worry, I'm leaving. It was nice to meet you too, Iruka-san."

The boy blushed at the honorific, probably unused to hearing it addressed to himself. He was cute, with that high ponytail and a friendly, open face -- the long scar across his nose wasn't even worth a second's notice in a village full of ninja -- and if she were a few years younger or he were a few years older, Yukiko mused, she might try something. As it was, she felt a bit motherly, wanted to ruffle his hair and keep an eye on him. That was Naruto's fault; before he moved in, she'd never had the urge to mother anything, not even lost puppies. The kid was really throwing her life out of its old patterns.

Iruka waved as he vanished into the academy building, and Yukiko kicked herself into motion, walking away from the grounds. She wished him luck. She might even go to the exam finals to cheer for him, if he made it that far. She wasn't a ninja anymore, but it was nice to see somebody working toward a dream.

Somebody besides Naruto, that was -- sure the kid had a dream, but pigs would fly before anyone let the Kyuubi's host become Hokage. Yukiko grinned to herself. She'd become a jounin before that kid would be Hokage, and _that_ was certainly never going to happen.

\---------------

"Yukiko-san, Yukiko-san!"

An orange whirlwind swept into her office so fast Yukiko didn't have time to adjust herself to withstand Naruto's exuberant tackle-hug. Her chair skidded, caught on the corner of her desk, and slammed backwards, tumbling both of them across the floor.

"Ow."

"Yukiko-san, are you okay? Hey, hey, I'm sorry! But I had to tell you! I saw the old man today and he said the chuunin exams start next week, and he wants to talk to you about them. Maybe he wants you to try! Or maybe he wants you to help set them up!"

Yukiko extracted herself from under Naruto and propped herself up against her filing cabinets, hand pressed to the back of her head. The room seemed to waver slightly around her. "Run that by me again, kid?"

Naruto bounced on his toes, completely unhurt by his fall. "The Hokage wants to talk to you about the chuunin exams, Yukiko-san. He's waiting right now. Can I come too? I want to know what he wants!"

Yukiko froze as her pain suddenly became irrelevant.

Ten minutes later she dragged a panting, sweating Naruto into the Hokage's office. "What the hell do you want! I'm not a ninja anymore, I don't take missions, and I'm certainly not taking the chuunin exam. And other people can do better genjutsu if that's what you want. And if the kid just made this all up, tell me now so I can yell at him with a clear conscience."

The Hokage smiled awkwardly. "I see. Please let Naruto go, Yukiko-san; this isn't his fault. I called you here because I have a slight problem. I believe you've met Umino Iruka?"

Yukiko blinked. "Yes. He's a genin, works as an assistant at the academy. Has anything happened?"

"Not exactly. He took your advice and posted a request for partners in the chuunin exam. So far, he's found one. Unfortunately, because Iruka has failed the chuunin exam three times, and because of certain issues surrounding the other genin, they haven't been able to find a third partner." The Hokage frowned. "I want the Leaf to make a strong showing in this exam; the Kazekage of the Sand has been making vague hints about dissatisfaction with the terms of our alliance and I don't want him to have any excuse to consider us weak. Iruka and Tonoike Naga -- the other genin -- have a good chance of passing the tests. I would very much like them to participate."

He looked gravely at Yukiko. "You would also do well, Yukiko-san. I remember your fight in your last chuunin exam; you're one of the most creative genjutsu users I've seen in years. And right now, Konoha needs all the shinobi we can find."

The Hokage wanted her to take the chuunin exam. The _Hokage_ wanted _her_ to take the chuunin exam. What on earth was he _thinking?_

Yukiko opened her mouth to refuse, but Naruto spoke first. "Hey, hey, Yukiko-san, see? I told you you're a good ninja."

"...But I'm not. Really. And I don't want to be a ninja anymore."

Naruto's face fell. "But, Yukiko-san! Didn't you have a dream to be a ninja? You had to try hard to be a genin, right? Why did you give up?"

"I didn't give up," Yukiko snapped. "But sometimes it's better to forget your dreams, kid. Sometimes dreams are just a way to beat your head against brick walls. And sometimes dreams are never going to come true no matter how hard you try." She met Naruto's gaze straight on, matching him glare for glare. The world wasn't fair. Some dreams just weren't worth holding on to. He had to learn that sooner or later.

Naruto scowled, his whisker marks stretching across his round cheeks. "I don't believe you. I'm never gonna give up, not like you. You're just a scaredy-cat! We don't have a deal anymore -- I'm gonna go home and spill paint all over your desk."

He stomped out of the room, pausing only to stick his tongue out at the Hokage.

Yukiko started as she remembered he been standing there all along, watching her argue with a six year old boy. She felt herself blushing.

"Maybe he's more pig-headed than the Fourth," the Third Hokage said with a small smile. "I don't remember the Fourth ever dressing down his teachers quite that bluntly, much though Jiraiya may have deserved it." He sighed. "I'll tell Iruka and Naga that I wasn't able to find a third partner for them." He turned and began walking toward the door.

"Wait."

The Hokage paused. "Yes, Yukiko-san?"

"...If I agreed to take the exam, would you help me find someone to manage my building while I'm busy?"

"Certainly. Should I begin looking, or was that only a hypothetical question?"

Yukiko wove her fingers together, clenching them until her knuckles turned white. She bit her lip, ducked her head, and took a deep breath.

"Yes. Yes, I'll do it."

The Hokage smiled and stuck his pipe back between his teeth. "Wonderful. Now, I suggest you hurry home and explain things to Naruto before he succeeds in destroying your office."

Oh, no. He'd said something about paint and her desk, and she'd been working on insurance forms when the kid had burst in just half an hour ago...

Yukiko bolted out the door, praying to all the kami she could think of that she'd make it home before the damage was permanent. Forget the chuunin exam -- she had _far_ more important things to worry about!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter the Third, in which Naga reveals her lack of tact, Iruka reveals his ability to think strategically, Yukiko reveals her talent at genjutsu, the author reveals her tendency to think _way_ too hard about the mechanics of weird ninja skills, and Naruto is just his usual self.

The mission center was nearly empty -- ninja generally picked up their assignments in the morning, leaving the clerical workers nothing to do in the afternoons but sort through new mission requests. Yukiko skulked outside the doorway, remaining visible despite her strong urge to either use a genjutsu disguise or run away.

Sarutobi Hokage-sama had told her to meet her new teammates here at noon. She'd come half an hour early, since it was easier to lurk alone with her tangled thoughts than to try explaining her change of heart to Naruto. The kid was thrilled at her choice, but still upset over her previous refusal to take the chuunin exam and the way she'd mocked his dream of becoming Hokage.

Eventually she couldn't take his watchful eyes anymore, and she certainly couldn't concentrate on insurance forms. So she'd fled.

Unfortunately, it seemed that her new partners didn't have any similar issues driving them to arrive early. She hoped they'd at least be on time. Iruka probably would be -- he'd seemed fairly responsible -- but she had no idea what the other genin was like.

Five minutes later, as Yukiko leaned against the wall and traced patterns in the dust with her sandal, two shadows fell across hers. "Hello, Iruka-san," she said, studying her toes with sudden intensity.

"Yukiko-san? You're our third partner? Hokage-sama didn't say who you were." There was a slight pause. "You recognized me from my shadow?"

"Your ponytail is distinctive." Yukiko shook her hair back and looked up to examine her teammates.

Iruka looked the same as the last time she'd run across him -- ragged ponytail, black pants, dark shirt, scarred face, and a mild, unobtrusive air. He seemed adorably harmless -- she hoped that was only an impression he cultivated in order to make people underestimate him, rather than an accurate reflection of his skills. He carried a battered pack slung over his shoulder.

The other genin was younger than Iruka -- while he was in his late teens, she looked as though she'd only been out of the academy a year at most. She was deathly pale, with short-cropped dark hair and long bangs that shadowed her golden eyes. Unlike many girls, who aspired to be elegant kunoichi and wore dress-like outfits, she wore practical dark pants and a purple vest over a fishnet shirt, with tape wound around her pant cuffs to keep them from flapping. Her one concession to femininity was a pair of shimmering mother-of-pearl earrings.

"We should introduce ourselves," Yukiko said, pushing off from the wall. "I'm Ayakawa Yukiko. I specialize in genjutsu and traps. My ninjutsu and taijutsu are limited and I haven't been an active ninja for several years; I retired to manage an apartment building. But recently I've been thinking about being a ninja again, and Sarutobi Hokage-sama asked me to join your team. What about you?"

"Umino Iruka. I have basic ninjutsu, genjutsu, and unarmed taijutsu. My jounin-sensei said I'm best at strategy and using weapons both in close combat and at a distance. I don't have any special jutsu." Iruka looked down as if embarrassed by his lack of flashy skills. "I want to teach at the academy and I need to be a chuunin to do that."

The girl gave Yukiko and Iruka a cool, searching look, and then spoke. Her voice was low and slightly gravelly. "Tonoike Naga. Unarmed taijutsu specialist -- I have a bloodline limit that helps." She opened her mouth and let her tongue run out, far past the length any human appendage should reach. As she retracted it, her body seemed to go temporarily boneless and she undulated to the side. "That's how it works. No genjutsu worth mentioning. No ninjutsu worth mentioning. I'm learning to summon ravens."

There was a brief silence.

Yukiko touched her forehead-protector for reassurance, disguising the motion as an adjustment to her hair. "Huh. So, now we know a little about each other. We only have a week until the exam and we need to practice working as a team. Do you have any special practice areas?"

Iruka shook his head and Naga twitched a shoulder.

Yukiko sighed. Looking after a hyperactive six year old apparently wasn't enough trouble in her life; now she seemed to be stuck managing a pair of teenagers as well. "Okay. I have a yard behind my building. My tenants use it for exercising pets, but we can chase them off and run some basic drills. Follow me."

\---------------

Miraculously Naruto wasn't waiting for her to return -- Yukiko supposed somebody had come by and dragged him off to afternoon classes. She led her two partners around the building to the large, tree-lined yard that lay between her building and the village wall. It was used for exercising pets, but it also acted as a staging area for village defense and a barrier to prevent enemies from leaping directly from the wall to the village rooftops.

As such, it held some inactive traps that could be armed at the first sign of an invasion. Yukiko knew their working inside and out, since it was her responsibility to trigger them. She figured they might make decent practice aids.

"This is a nice area," Iruka said as he looked around the yard. "Do you get much incidental damage from being so near the village wall?"

"Not really -- even when we were at war, this part of the wall is sheltered by the outcropping over there, so most attacks came in other areas."

Naga cast an appraising glance at the stones looming beyond the massive wooden wall. "Looks like a good place to set up long-range weapons."

Yukiko grinned. "You'd think so, from here, but the other sides are mostly a sheer cliff, and what idiot is going to haul equipment up _this_ side of the rock with all our ninja ready to shoot at _him?_ Especially since we have the Hyuuga and the Uchiha so we're sure to spot them."

"Good point." Naga dropped to the ground and began a series of stretches, ignoring the other two.

Iruka and Yukiko looked at each other. "I haven't done this sort of thing in a while, Yukiko-san," Iruka said. "Do you have any ideas?"

This boy wanted to be a teacher? Where was his confidence? "Let's start by demonstrating our skills so we know where we stand. Then we can plan ways to mesh our efforts and not interfere with each other. Oh, and we're teammates now -- just call me Yukiko."

Yukiko looked at Naga, who was flowing from a center split into a handstand. "You look warmed up, Naga. Why don't you go first?"

Naga stared sourly through her bangs, but she twitched her shoulder, took a stance, and ran through a blindingly fast series of kata before launching into free-form motion. She shaped the emptiness around her until the other genin could almost see the imaginary opponents she was fighting, and Yukiko whistled in appreciation at the way Naga used her bloodline limit.

The girl wasn't using any jutsu other than the occasional Kawarimi, replacing herself with stray rocks and sticks lying around the yard. But her body flowed and curved and bent in eye-straining ways, her limbs and neck extended like serpents, and her tongue swept out to act as a prehensile fifth limb. It was next to impossible to predict her movements, since ninja were trained to read the human body and Naga could reshape herself until her body had very little to do with human physiology.

When Naga finally stopped, freezing in a fatal neck strike to her imagined enemy, Yukiko burst into applause. Iruka joined her, smiling at Naga.

"That was amazing!" he said. "With you on our team, we'll pass the exam for certain."

Naga shrugged. "I'm no good at strategy," she warned. "All I can do is fight -- you'll have to tell me when and where."

"That shouldn't be a problem," Yukiko decided. "Iruka? Will you demonstrate now?"

The boy flushed. "It won't look like much, not after Naga. But I'll try." He dropped his pack to the ground and began pulling weapons out of it -- kunai, shuriken of all sizes, explosive notes, smoke bombs, flash bombs, chains, collapsible metal bo staves, various swords, and several sharp or spiky objects Yukiko didn't recognize. She wasn't certain, but she thought Iruka must have used some sort of jutsu on the pack in order to fit that armory inside -- she couldn't figure out how on earth he got a katana in there otherwise.

"I don't normally carry all of these at once, but I thought I should bring them today. You can decide which will work best with your own skills," Iruka said. "Do you have a target I can use, Yukiko-sa... um, Yukiko?"

"Hang on a minute and I'll set one up."

Yukiko pulled her keys from her jacket pocket and unlocked the back door. She'd thrown away all her old target boards after the Kyuubi's attack, but she had a gallon of blue paint sitting around thanks to Naruto's tantrum this morning. She could sacrifice one of the trees to Iruka's weapons.

Naga gave her a peculiar look when Yukiko walked out carrying a can and a paintbrush, and Iruka seemed to be restraining several comments.

"I got rid of my old targets," Yukiko said as she painted concentric rings, feeling that she ought to offer some sort of explanation. "One of my tenants left this around -- the one I mentioned the last time we met, Iruka -- and I thought we might as well get some use out of it."

Iruka laughed. "He just left it around? Strange kid."

Yukiko grinned. "Strange is not the word; impossible comes closer. He likes practical jokes. Just think -- if you pass the chuunin exam, you may be teaching him next year!"

"He can't be worse than I was," Iruka muttered, face darkening briefly, but he recovered and offered a tentative smile. "Shall I start now?"

Iruka turned out to be one of the better marksmen Yukiko had seen in a while, and could also angle weapons off one another to reach otherwise impossible targets. Yukiko asked him to spar with Naga in order to demonstrate his close combat techniques -- Naga didn't use her bloodline limit, though from her expression when Iruka got his weapons to her throat or other vital points, she strongly wanted to slide out of the way and beat him into the ground.

Iruka apologized every time Naga didn't dodge fast enough and he drew blood. Yukiko sighed. How, exactly, did the boy expect to be a ninja without hurting people? True, teaching would keep him out of the dirtier missions, but any ninja had to be prepared to kill.

She called a break before Iruka could pin Naga again. "What do you think?" she asked the girl. "He can't carry all the weapons; which will be most useful?"

Naga scowled at Iruka. "Give the bombs and explosive notes to Yukiko for her traps -- she says she's good at them. Take all your kunai and the small shuriken -- you're accurate, so you don't need the big ones to make sure you hit something. Ditch the other throwing things -- same reason. Ditch the bo. Ditch the katana -- too flashy and awkward in close combat. Take the two kodachi, but paint them black so they don't reflect."

Her lips curled into a small, cockeyed smile. "And ditch the chains. They're way too kinky."

Iruka flushed scarlet.

"Thank you, Naga," Yukiko said hastily. "Now it's my turn to show what I can do. Iruka, may I have the bombs and the explosive notes for later?"

Iruka handed over his packets of notes and his stash of flash and smoke bombs. Yukiko moved to the a nearby tree and knelt as if to arrange the bombs. "It's no good to demonstrate traps if you already know where they are, so I'll start with genjutsu." She grinned as she started forming seals where Naga and Iruka couldn't see. "While you're trying to break the illusions, I'll set up some traps. There are some deadly ones already in this area since it's against the village wall, but I won't arm those. Watch for them, though -- it would be really stupid to fail the chuunin exam because you got a poisoned stake through your leg today."

Naga snorted. "Your genjutsu's strong enough to keep us under for that long? Even I can do a basic dispelling."

"Genjutsu is trickier than ninjutsu or taijutsu," Yukiko said, standing. She glanced at the other genin and nodded to herself. They were looking to her left, where their minds now told them she was standing. Good. The longer they accepted her reality as their reality, the harder it would be for them to remember how to dispel the genjutsu.

She pulled a coil of darkened wire and a roll of cord from her pockets and starting unwinding them, talking as she tied a slipknot and looped the rope over a branch. "True genjutsu doesn't just change what you see and hear; it changes how you _think_ about what you see and hear. If a genjutsu caster is skilled enough, he can make you forget that you're being affected by illusions. In order to dispel the genjutsu you have to fight not only the caster but also your own mind, which is telling you that nothing is wrong, that the genjutsu is real."

...And there! That was probably enough hidden nooses. Now she'd start on the explosive traps. There wasn't time to do anything complicated, but if there was one thing Yukiko was good at, it was hiding things. That worked for traps as well as illusions.

"Also, the longer you accept a targeted genjutsu, the more it weakens your will -- that is, if the caster has any sense. Good illusions include a little voice in the back of your mind telling you to believe, to give in, so when you finally set your will to dispel the genjutsu, the caster has a strong advantage. You have to be very stubborn and strong-willed to break a long-running genjutsu.

"Of course, area illusions are less complex and easier to break. And even with targeted genjutsu, the more people the caster is trying to affect, the thinner her will is spread and the easier it is to dispel the illusion over any given person... but I'm only targeting you two. And you've been accepting everything I say for several minutes now." Yukiko set down the explosive note in her hands and twitched her fingers through another three seals; in Iruka's and Naga's minds, the false Yukiko smiled and grew fangs. "Let's see how well you deal with _my_ world."

Now things got tricky -- she had to devote her attention to the genjutsu, concentrate her chakra and will on maintaining the illusions, and keep her hands ready for reinforcing seals. But she also had to set traps and be ready to hide when someone broke the genjutsu.

Naga liked to fight. Yukiko threw her into complete darkness, surrounded by chill, stinging whips with no obvious origin. Nothing for the girl to fight there, but Yukiko's voice echoed from behind the whips, taunting Naga with the hope that if she could hit her, the genjutsu would break. Yukiko smiled. A good blow _would_ break her concentration and dispel the illusion, but she wasn't anywhere near where Naga was lunging around.

The girl was so furious she'd forgotten the dispelling seal, an attitude Yukiko subtly encouraged.

Iruka didn't like hurting people. He was shy, easily embarrassed, and easily flustered. Yukiko gave him three corpses for companions and dumped him into the middle of a crowd, who drew back from his blood-streaked face, torn clothing, and dripping kodachi. A child whimpered in fear. Iruka looked down in shock and dismay, trying to figure out what was happening.

"They're coming!" a voice cried from the back. "Please, kill them instead of us!"

The crowd drew away, leaving Iruka to face several kunoichi. They were armed to the hilt, wore clothes slashed in strategic places, and held both death and lust in their eyes. "So these useless bits of flesh want to live?" one asked, licking her kunai. "You're kind of cute -- why don't you help us finish them off? I'm sure we could have a lot of... _fun_ together."

Iruka trembled. Iruka flushed. And Iruka snapped, charging at the kunoichi with his teeth bared and swords hungry for blood.

Yukiko, rigging a tripwire well away from the sudden whirlwind of blades, blinked as her illusory fighters twisted into action and she had to shape seals to keep the genjutsu from fraying around Iruka. She hadn't expected _that_ reaction -- she'd pegged the boy as a basically mild person and had wanted to freeze him with shame and confusion. Apparently he had a bit of a protective streak.

Naga was still lunging around fruitlessly, but Iruka dispatched the kunoichi before Yukiko could alter the rules enough to stop him. He fell to the grass, panting, and she watched him with interest. Unlike Naga, Iruka was starting to think.

"Genjutsu," he muttered, staring at the illusory corpses. "She was going to show us genjutsu. I was in a yard, not in a street. And... and... _Kai!_ " He formed the dispelling seal and set his will against Yukiko, bringing to bear the same passion he'd just shown in fighting the false kunoichi. Yukiko let him feel the strain of pushing against her for a few moments before she released her will and the illusion melted around him. It was best to release voluntarily; the backlash from a forcibly snapped genjutsu could knock her nearly unconscious.

Iruka looked around frantically, but Yukiko was up a tree, masked by leaves and branches and a subtle area illusion. The boy scowled at the sight of Naga flailing wildly at nothing, and directed his will toward her. "Kai!"

Yukiko winced as his chakra snapped through hers before she could release the genjutsu. That was going to be a monster headache.

Naga blinked, panting, as the sunny afternoon of the yard melted into her senses. "What? Where? The whips...?"

"Genjutsu," Iruka said. "Don't you remember?"

Naga bared her teeth. "I know. I could hear her -- just one hit, that's all I wanted. Coward, hiding in the dark."

Iruka gave her a questioning look. "If you knew it was an illusion, why didn't you dispel it?"

"...I didn't think," Naga said slowly. "It had to be an illusion -- total dark and whips coming out of nowhere -- but I heard her and that was all that mattered. I had to hit her."

Iruka nodded to himself. "That's what Yukiko said -- she changed how we thought, not just what we saw. A little voice, telling us what to do. I think I broke through mine because she didn't expect me to react the way I did." He nodded again. "She's good. I don't think she'd be as effective with people she'd never met -- my illusion was set up to play on my weaknesses -- but she's good."

Yukiko smiled at his assessment. She'd worked hard for her skill and it was vindicating to have someone acknowledge her. Also, Iruka was shaping up to be a good partner. He'd spotted that genjutsu didn't work so well on strangers -- she couldn't play on intimate weaknesses, had to go for more basic fears or deceptions instead. And from the lack of hesitation when he cast the dispelling jutsu, he'd noticed that she'd lied when she said fighting a genjutsu meant fighting yourself as well as the caster. That was only true until you realized you were in an illusion.

She ran through another set of seals to disguise the origin of her voice. "You broke the genjutsu -- good job! Now come find me."

Yukiko settled back on her branch to wait.

\---------------

It took Iruka and Naga five minutes to find her hiding place. They avoided over half of her traps and managed to dodge most of the ones they did trigger, but by the time Naga dropped down to Yukiko's branch and Iruka walked up the tree to join them, Yukiko had stuffed her hand into her mouth to stifle her laughter at their inadvertent comedy routine.

The teenagers were not amused -- not at being hauled into the air by their ankles, not at falling into hidden potholes, not at getting their hands stuck in finger-binds, and definitely not at having flash bombs set off in their faces. Iruka, with soot from a three-note explosion covering his face, looked particularly unhappy.

"Okay," he said. "You're good at setting traps. You're good at genjutsu. You're good at using genjutsu to hide traps. We believe you." His voice turned plaintive. "Did you have to show us like that?"

Yukiko shrugged. "How else would you have proof? Taijutsu and ninjutsu can usually be demonstrated harmlessly -- genjutsu and traps need victims. I should warn you that if you were enemies I'd be pretty helpless right now. I can stick a kunai into someone if they move slowly enough, but that's about it. Once you break my genjutsu and get past my traps, I'm done for, and genjutsu on that level drains chakra like water."

Naga offered another one of her tiny, cockeyed smiles. "That's where we come in."

"Yes," Iruka agreed. "Naga and I should be able to stop any opponents before they can dispel your genjutsu. I think we'll make a good team."

"You may be right." Yukiko dropped to the ground, wincing as the landing fed her growing backlash headache. "That's enough for today. Let's meet here again tomorrow. Is noon okay?"

They nodded.

"Good. See you then."

Naga swiftly vanished around the corner of Yukiko's building. Iruka bent to clean and put away his weapons, while Yukiko collected her rope and wire and disarmed the remaining explosive notes and bombs; it wouldn't do to catch a tenant in one of her traps. The bombs wouldn't fit in her pockets, so she pulled off her jacket and used it as a makeshift bag. Then she grabbed the paint can and brush.

Iruka smiled at the paint. "School should be out now," he said. "Would you introduce me to your tenant? After all, I may be teaching him next year."

"Sure. He's probably in my office -- follow me." Yukiko unlocked the back door and led the way through the building, past her own apartment, the door to the basement apartments, the laundry room, the various storage rooms and closets, the common room (her parents' idea, in which they'd been trying to build up a small library for tenants), and finally her office.

She held her finger to her lips. "Step only where I step -- the tiles are rigged to squeak and I want to surprise the kid."

Iruka followed her across the hallway, hanging close to her back as Yukiko eased the door open a crack, pulled a tiny mirror from her kunai holster, and examined the reflection of the room. She didn't usually go to this much trouble, but it would be embarrassing if Naruto caught her off guard in front of the teammate _she'd_ just spent half an hour catching off guard.

The kid was sitting at her desk, fiddling with her penholder -- sabotaging her tripwire, most likely. He'd left the top of the door untrapped for once. "Hey, kid," Yukiko said, swinging the door open. "Trying to rig my tripwire, huh?"

Naruto froze, face turned toward the door and eyes wide with surprise. "Um..."

"Don't worry about it, kid. I want you to meet one of my partners for the chuunin exam, Umino Iruka. He works at the ninja academy and he might be your teacher next year."

Naruto perked up. "Really? Hi, Iruka-san! I'm Uzumaki Naruto! I'm gonna be a ninja someday -- that's my dream! I live on the top floor, and Yukiko-san is teaching me to be sneaky like a real ninja. But she won't let me play tricks on other people and she makes me eat yucky vegetables instead of ramen. Can you help me learn to be a ninja too, Iruka-san?"

Iruka didn't answer, just stared blankly at the kid, hands clenched on his pack strap like he was hanging onto a lifeline over a chasm.

"Hey, hey, Iruka-san, are you okay?" Naruto leaned over and poked Yukiko, speaking in what he clearly assumed was a whisper but was really just a slightly hoarse version of his regular voice. "Is he okay, Yukiko-san? Are you sure he's a good partner for your exam? I think I broke him."

"I have to go," Iruka said abruptly. "Sorry, Yukiko-san."

Naruto slumped as the older boy hurried out the door. "See, I told you nobody likes me. Everybody always gives me funny looks, and then they yell when I ask why. You should get a new partner, Yukiko-san. He's stinky."

Everybody gave him... oh, shit. Had she really gotten so used to the kid that she'd forgotten about the Kyuubi? "Wait here, kid. I need to talk to him."

Yukiko jammed the office lock with a piece of wire to keep Naruto in place, and hurried after Iruka. He hadn't gone far, just outside to lean against the building with a lost expression, pack fallen to his feet.

"Iruka. Iruka, are you all right? I'm sorry I didn't think to tell you; I guess I've been around him long enough that I forget. He's a good kid, really, just with way too much energy..."

Iruka turned slowly to face her. "He killed my parents."

Oh. Oh, _shit_.

Yukiko dropped her jacket and slumped next to Iruka. He couldn't have been more than twelve when the Kyuubi attacked, maybe as young as ten. Kids still idealized their parents at that age, couldn't conceive of a world without them. Their deaths must have been devastating. But Iruka wasn't the only one who'd lost precious people to the fox.

"When I finally passed the academy exam," Yukiko began softly, "I was paired with two girls I barely knew -- Fuuma Ame and Ichihara Kasumi. It was a long time before we bothered to learn anything about each other beyond our ninja skills. But after a while we were like... like family, in a way. When my parents died, when I gave up being a ninja, they were there for me.

"Then they fought the Kyuubi. They died. And I wasn't there for them."

Yukiko started tracing patterns with her sandal, eyes pinned to her toes. "When Sarutobi-sama asked me to rent an apartment to Naruto, I was scared that I'd die like Kasumi and Ame. But he isn't the fox. He's a six year old kid, and all he knows is that nobody likes him and nobody will tell him why. Hating him won't bring anyone back.

She sighed. "I'm not asking you to be his friend, Iruka-san -- he can get on anyone's nerves in less than a minute -- but... don't hate him. Don't pretend he isn't there. Please. He's alone enough already."

She glanced sideways at Iruka. He was staring straight ahead, face too carefully expressionless to be natural. Yukiko waited.

"...Will he still be in your office?"

Huh? "I jammed the lock," Yukiko admitted. "Why?"

Iruka's mask cracked, letting a muddled mixture of shame, fear, hurt, anger, and an embarrassed flush show through. "I should apologize."

Yukiko blinked -- that was a lot more than she'd expected this soon. Maybe this would work out. "He'll be suspicious at first," she warned, and led Iruka back to her office.

Naruto sat cross-legged on her desk, mangling her penholder, and the door bore footprints and scuff marks around the lock plate from his escape attempts. He scowled as Yukiko and Iruka walked in. "That was mean, Yukiko-san. Why'd you have to bring back the stinky person?"

Iruka twitched. "My name is Iruka, not stinky person. I'm sorry I left without talking to you, and I'm... glad to meet you, Naruto-kun. Will you accept my apology?"

Naruto looked at Yukiko in confusion. "That means you forgive him, kid," she said. "You say you don't mind that he was rude, because he feels bad about it and won't do it again. But you don't have to. It's your choice."

Eyes narrowed, Naruto studied Iruka. The older boy flushed under the examination, but held a neutral expression on his face. Finally Naruto hopped off the desk and looked challengingly up at Iruka.

"Hey, hey, Iruka-san, do you like ramen?"

Iruka looked puzzled, but nodded.

"Yukiko-san says ramen isn't good for me and she makes me eat vegetables all the time. If I say I don't mind that you were mean, will you take me out for ramen?"

Iruka glanced warily at Yukiko. "I guess I could."

"Really? Cool! If I don't mind and you stop being mean, it's like we're friends! I've never had a friend before. Maybe you can tell Yukiko-san that it's okay to eat ramen all the time. Can you do that, Iruka-san?"

Yukiko shot warning looks at both boys. "It is _not_ okay to eat nothing but ramen, kid. But I guess Iruka can take you out to eat if he wants. It'll get you out of my hair."

A mischievous look flitted over Iruka's face, and he crouched down to Naruto's level. "My mother used to make me eat salad all the time, and I didn't like it either. I used to sneak out and buy candy instead. I think it would be fun to sneak out and buy ramen for you."

Naruto beamed. "You're cool, Iruka-san! See, see, Yukiko-san, now I have a friend and he's gonna help me sneak around and not eat your yucky vegetables."

Yukiko stifled a smile. "Generally you shouldn't announce your plans to the enemy, kid, but I'll let that pass for today. Go on, get out of here."

Iruka nodded to her, shouldered his pack, and led a bouncing, babbling Naruto out of the office. Yukiko smiled until they were out of sight. Then she dumped her jacket on top of the mess Naruto had made of her desk, locked the office door, and headed off to buy some aspirin.

She had a feeling she'd be needing a lot of it over the next few weeks.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter the Fourth, in which we meet some of Yukiko's family, Iruka is devious, Naga threatens to break legs, Naruto and Yukiko strike a deal, and, to the author's surprise, Kakashi decides to join the story.

By the morning of the chuunin exam, Yukiko felt like she was running on pure nerves. She was sure she could pass the first test -- it usually had to do with being sneaky and somewhat smarter than a rock -- but she was a little worried about Naga's performance. She was worried about her own performance on the second test, whatever it would be this year. She was worried about the way Naruto was so confident she'd pass -- how would he react if she didn't?

And she was worried because Sarutobi-sama hadn't been any help finding a superintendent to run her building while she was busy, and she'd been so busy training with her new team that she hadn't been able to look over candidates herself.

Yukiko groaned. She was going to have to talk to her uncle. And do it within -- she glanced at her watch -- one hour, or she'd be late turning in her exam application.

"This is it, kid; I'm off to the chuunin exam," she said to Naruto, who was watching her cram survival gear into a small pack -- the second test would likely be a simulation of a mission and she did _not_ want a repeat of her first exam where she was caught in the woods with no sanitary supplies and ended up getting poison ivy rash in unmentionable places. Ame had mocked her for weeks after that.

"Now? You'll do great, Yukiko-san! I know you're a great ninja." Naruto grinned. "But I'm gonna be better than you someday."

Compared to becoming Hokage, that was a ridiculously easy goal. "You do that, kid. Oh, by the way -- I'm getting someone to watch over the building while I'm taking the exam, so don't be surprised if a stranger comes by with keys to my office. And don't play any jokes until I get back."

Naruto pouted. "Not any?"

Yukiko considered. If she made the restriction too hard, he might stop following any of her rules; that would be a disaster. "Okay, you can set traps in my apartment for when I get back. But don't bother anyone else!"

"You'll be in trouble!" Naruto sing-songed, with a dangerous glint in his blue eyes. "I'm gonna get you! Hehehe."

"These had better be some good traps," Yukiko said, deadpan. "And now I'm really leaving. See you later, kid."

"Bye, Yukiko-san!"

Yukiko gave herself one last check -- hair tied back, forehead-protector on, kunai holster strapped to her thigh, explosive notes in her boots and pockets, bombs in her pack, and a dull brown jacket instead of her usual light blue. She might not feel like a confident shinobi, but at least she was dressed the part. Squaring her shoulders, Yukiko walked out of her apartment.

\---------------

Her uncle, Ayakawa Yutaro, lived over his grocery store halfway between Yukiko's building and the ninja academy where the first test would be held. He let other people manage the store in the mornings and spent his own time upstairs reviewing stock inventories, balancing account books, and placing orders with his suppliers. Yukiko nodded at the short, blue-haired girl behind the counter -- Yui, the youngest of her cousins -- and slipped up the back stairs into Yutaro's office.

"Uncle Yutaro?"

Yutaro jerked his head up in surprise, spinning his chair to face her. "Yukiko? How did you get up here? I didn't hear anything." His deep-set eyes narrowed as he studied her.

Yukiko shoved her hands into her pockets. She'd forgotten that Yutaro kept his stairs creaky so he could hear intruders. Before she'd started training again, she'd been careful not to avoid making noise, but this time she'd ghosted up the stairs without thinking about it.

"Sorry, Uncle. I'm trying to be a ninja again and I was practicing."

Yutaro shook his head with a sigh. "I thought you were over that nonsense. It didn't work out, and you've been doing such a wonderful job with your building." He laid down his pen and raked a hand through his thinning blue-gray hair. "What brings you here? Knowing you, you want something besides the pleasure of my company."

"...Well, yes. I'm taking the chuunin exam again and I need someone to act as superintendent while I'm busy. I asked a person I know to help me find people, but I guess he's been too busy, and the exam starts today. I was hoping you knew someone..."

Yutaro sighed again. "Yukiko. Why is it that all your business sense flies out the window the moment someone mentions ninja to you?"

Yukiko shuffled her feet and didn't answer.

"Well, I suppose there's no stopping you; there never was, really. How long will you need this superintendent? Just for the duration of the exam, or will it become a full-time position?"

Yukiko shrugged uncomfortably. "I don't know. First I have to pass the exam, which may not happen. And then... I don't know if I want to be an active shinobi. I just want to prove that I can do it, that I quit because I wanted to, not because I couldn't handle the work."

She switched back to business talk. "I thought one of my cousins might benefit from some hands-on experience."

"Hmm. Possibly Yusuke -- a little responsibility might settle him down. Yes," Yutaro decided, nodding, "Yusuke can do it. Now, what are the details?"

Yusuke? Yukiko turned over what she knew about her second-youngest cousin. Fairly bright, unassuming, a little scattered but basically responsible, and friendly. Yes, he'd do. "I don't have a room for him yet, but you live close enough that he can walk over in the morning. Basically he has to fix anything that breaks, clean the common areas, and handle any tenant complaints. He'll also have to show apartments if people are interested, but I'd rather leave contract-signing authority with you until he has more experience -- he's only fifteen, right?"

Yutaro nodded. "Yes. If anything breaks beyond his ability to repair it, which contractors should he call?"

"There's a list in my office; I've written down the usual prices in case they try to scam him. I'll leave the spare keys with you."

That seemed to be everything, but Yukiko had a nagging feeling she was forgetting something important. Oh! The kid.

"...There's one last thing," she said slowly. "It shouldn't be a problem, but you ought to know. I've rented an apartment to Uzumaki Naruto -- the kid the Fourth Hokage sealed the Kyuubi into. I've been keeping an eye on him, and he has a key to my apartment. So Yusuke shouldn't worry if he sees a boy going in and out of my room."

Yutaro's narrow face had gone still. "So the rumors are true. You _are_ housing the Kyuubi."

"I'm housing _Naruto_ ," Yukiko said defensively, "and Naruto isn't the Kyuubi. He's its prison. Yusuke shouldn't need to have anything to do with him, I hope. But if he can't at least be polite and fair if the kid has any maintenance requests, then our deal is off. I rented him an apartment and I don't play favorites with my tenants. So tell me -- can Yusuke handle that?"

"Asking him to deal with the creature that killed his mother is a bit much, Yukiko."

Oh, by the kami! Yukiko strode forward and slammed her fist on Yutaro's desk. "Old man, get over yourself! So the fox killed Aunt Hanako. So what! I lost my two best friends that day -- lost my _sisters_ \-- and I can see past the fox. One of my new teammates lost _both_ his parents to the fox and he's starting to treat Naruto as a little brother. Naruto is a six year old boy. He doesn't know about the fox, he isn't responsible for the fox, and if you can't get past that, then we're through."

She glared at Yutaro, daring him to disagree.

Her uncle sat in perfect stillness for nearly a minute before he answered. "You're young and hot-blooded, so I won't take that as the insult it is. Yusuke can handle the job. However, if you ever take your aunt's death so lightly again, or insinuate that I might be less than fair in my business dealings, I will disown you from our clan.

"Give me the keys and leave."

Yukiko fished the keys from her pocket, dropped them into Yutaro's waiting palm, and bowed with icy precision. "We have a deal. Please send Yusuke to my building by noon today. Goodbye, Uncle."

"Goodbye, Yukiko."

As she left, Yukiko made a point of forcing the stairs to creak as loudly as possible.

\---------------

Iruka and Naga were waiting by the main entrance to the ninja academy, both carrying small survival packs. Iruka was fidgeting, hands constantly reaching over his shoulders to touch the hilts of his kodachi. Naga was trying to look unworried, but her restless eyes betrayed her.

"You're late," she accused.

"I had to settle something with my family," Yukiko said, pushing down her anger and nerves. "It took longer than I expected. Let's go turn in our applications."

Iruka led the way through the building to room at the back of the second floor. They passed several rooms disguised with genjutsu to fool the unwary into misfiling their applications, but Yukiko spotted some of the illusions and Iruka knew the building well enough to be sure the disguised locations weren't anywhere near their goal. They reached the correct room with five minutes to spare and deposited their applications on the desk near the door.

Genin from all the hidden villages of Fire Country's neighbors crowded the room, some socializing in groups of various size and others staying aloof near the walls. Yukiko studied them, wondering which would fail and which would reach the third test. She didn't recognize any of the Leaf genin, didn't have any idea what their skills were, but it had been several years since her last attempt at the exam; most of the genin she'd known would have passed it or given up by now.

Five minutes passed, and then ten. The room grew restive, people wondering loudly when the first test would start. Silly of them -- waiting might be part of it, a test of patience.

But there was no reason not to talk quietly. "Do you know the other Leaf genin here, or what their skills are?" Yukiko asked her teammates.

Iruka shook his head. "Not personally -- none of my friends are here and I don't get to know the academy students that well."

Naga grimaced. "Most are no threat -- they'll wash out fast. But those three," -- she pointed to three dark-haired genin -- "were in my academy class. Their jounin-sensei didn't let them take the exam last year. Watch out for them -- one's an Uchiha, one's a Hyuuga, and the girl's an Aburame. They're jerks."

Huh. Those were three of the hereditary ninja clans of Konoha. The Uchiha had the Sharingan bloodline limit, the Hyuuga had the equally powerful Byakugan and its related taijutsu style, and the Aburame controlled kikkai insects, some of which could eat chakra. That would be a team to watch out for.

"Why didn't they take the exam last year?" Yukiko asked.

"Teamwork problems," Iruka said. "I remember hearing about them while they were still in the academy. Those three -- Uchiha Akaro, Hyuuga Shiro, and Aburame Kuroko -- don't play well with others, which is probably why they were placed together."

Naga nodded. "Like I said, they're jerks." She scowled at her former classmates.

Before Yukiko could answer, a swirl of leaves pulled everyone's attention to the front of the room. It cleared to reveal a silver-haired jounin wearing a cloth mask over his lower face and a forehead-protector pulled down over his left eye. Yukiko blinked. That was Hatake Kakashi, the Copy Ninja, one of the Leaf's elite -- he was so skilled that even though he and Yukiko were the same age, he'd already graduated from the ninja academy before she'd entered. What was someone of his level doing at a chuunin exam?

Administering the first test, apparently, since he strolled over to the door, swept the application forms from the desk, and stuffed them into a pouch. "Yo. Welcome to the chuunin exam," he said, sounding bored. "It's hard, you'll probably fail, and you might die. If you want to leave, the door's open."

Several people shifted uncomfortably, but no one left.

"Okay," Kakashi said. "We'll start the first test now. Follow me."

He led the crowd of genin outside of the building, to where a temporary wall had been thrown up around several of the academy training grounds. "Somewhere in that field is a scroll you have to retrieve, guarded by traps and a few chuunin. You'll go in one at a time, get the scroll, and escape through a gate on the far side. You'll be ranked on speed, avoiding traps, avoiding the guards, and how far you get after they notice you." He ran a lazy eye over the teams. "Anyone caught cheating will be disqualified along with his team."

Instructions finished, Kakashi pulled a small book out of nowhere and slouched against the wall, reading. The genin shuffled uncertainly.

"Um, when do we start?" someone asked.

Kakashi looked up and blinked. "Whenever you want. I'll tell you when the traps are reset and the next person can go in."

The teams nearest the gateway conferred until a short girl strode forward, cracked the gate open as narrowly as possible, and slipped through. The other genin settled in to wait -- this could go on all day.

Yukiko, Iruka, and Naga looked at each other. This could be trouble -- Iruka was generally good at spotting traps and being unobtrusive, and Yukiko, of course, was an expert on hiding, but this test required the exact opposite of Naga's strengths.

"We have to cheat," Iruka muttered, pulling the other two off to the side.

Naga glared through her bangs. "We'll be disqualified! Besides, I don't need help."

"Maybe not, but we should have a plan just in case," Iruka said soothingly. "You heard what Kakashi-san said -- anyone _caught_ cheating will be disqualified. We just have to be especially sneaky." He grinned, looking for all the world like Naruto planning a practical joke.

Yukiko gave him a wary look. "...What are you thinking, Iruka?"

"Genjutsu affects the mind," he said. "How tightly can you focus an illusion -- can you make it only affect the two of us and not anyone else? Also, can you add something to our perception without blotting out the real world?"

"Superimposing something is easy -- that's what Bunshin is based on, after all. Keeping a genjutsu from affecting the area around a person is harder -- I can keep a three foot radius with no trouble, but tighter than that is tricky. Why?"

"Kakashi-san said they'd be resetting the traps. That means they're using the same traps for each person, so if you go first, you'll know where they are. Then you can cast a genjutsu to make them stand out for us, so Naga and I can avoid them. I'd ask you to make us hard to see as well, but I think that's too obvious."

Naga scowled. "I don't like it. I can get through this on my own."

Hmm. The girl had a point -- this was a test of their individual abilities -- but then again, no ninja could do everything on her own, and they were in teams for a reason. The issue had never come up in Yukiko's old team; Ame and Kasumi had been at least as smart and sneaky as she was, so the first test had never been a problem for them. With this team, though, cheating seemed more and more of a good idea.

"I'm sure you can get through this test on your own, but that may not be the point," Yukiko said. "We're shinobi. That means we have to think around corners and be sneaky. Cheating is a perfectly valid way to pass the test. Besides, we're a team. You'll do better with a bit of help, and that will help us all pass."

"Exactly," Iruka agreed. "Please don't be stubborn, Naga."

Naga twitched her shoulder irritably. "Oh, fine. Go ahead and cheat. But if we get disqualified I'll break your legs."

"If we get disqualified, I won't stop you." Iruka turned to Yukiko. "You _can_ cast a genjutsu that narrowly focused, right?"

Yukiko tried not to panic at the sudden responsibility. If she said she couldn't, Naga would probably fail the test. If she said she could and then got caught, _she'd_ be the one getting them disqualified -- after Sarutobi-sama had asked her specifically to help Iruka and Naga pass the exam. And getting caught cheating on the first test wouldn't make a good show of strength to impress the other hidden villages.

_Could_ she cast genjutsu that precisely? Could she remember the position of each trap well enough to make it visible to her teammates?

...Sarutobi-sama thought so. 'Subtle and precise,' he'd said, talking about her genjutsu skills. Maybe she could do this. There had to be a reason she was on the team, after all...

An explosion from beyond the wall jarred her out of her thoughts. Iruka and Naga were watching her expectantly.

"Yes, I can. Hold still for a minute while I memorize your chakra signatures."

Yukiko took a deep breath, closed her eyes, and felt around with the combination of chakra and will she used to impose her reality on others, groping for the chakra of her teammates. Iruka was warm and smooth, a sense of comfort and control over deep sadness and pain, laced through with bubbly trails of shyness and humor. Naga was cool and raspy, like sliding a hand against the grain of snakeskin, layers and layers of wariness blocking any attempt to reach further in. Yukiko pushed a little deeper, getting a sense of outrage and driving purpose, but eased back before that buried anger could turn towards her.

She ran a mental hand over the crowd of genin, checking to make sure nobody resembled her teammates too closely. She would be safe; they were unmistakable.

"I'll be able to find you later," she said, opening her eyes, "but how will I know to start the genjutsu? I don't want to keep it running longer than I have to."

"We'll go right after you," Naga said.

"Yes, but how will I know when the traps are reset? They may not tell us on the far side."

Iruka considered that. "Does it take much chakra to watch our signatures?"

"Not as much as actual genjutsu, but it isn't something I'd want to do all day long."

"But you can do it. We'll flare our chakra when we go in. Start the genjutsu then."

"Flare it _before_ we open the gate," Naga added, frowning at Iruka. "Don't need to call attention to ourselves inside."

"Right," Iruka said, looking embarrassed. "So we have a plan. Yukiko goes first and marks the traps and guards. I'll go next, then Naga. Just before Naga and I enter the field, we flare our chakra so Yukiko can cast a genjutsu on us, making the traps and guards stand out. If we flare our chakra again, drop the genjutsu."

"I'll make the traps bright orange," Yukiko said, smiling as she thought of Naruto's ridiculously colored jumpsuit.

"Should be hard to miss," Naga said, cockeyed smile flashing across her face.

They settled in to wait, sitting on the grass and watching the other genin slip through the gate one by one.

\---------------

It was mid afternoon before Iruka decided they might as well move up to the gate and get in line. They'd eaten a small lunch from the supplies they were carrying, and had become inured to the explosions and assorted yells drifting over the wall from the field. Naga was particularly philosophical -- "Can't be worse than what you did to us last week," she said to Yukiko.

Yukiko had her doubts, but kept them to herself.

Up close to the gate, they couldn't discuss their plan any further. Yukiko amused herself by examining the other genin, wondering how they planned to avoid the traps and how they planned to cheat. She was engaged in a staring match with a green-haired boy from Hidden Grass when a stone whizzed between them to strike a shinobi of Hidden Mist.

"What was that for?" the Mist-nin yelled, glaring at Kakashi.

"Disqualified," the jounin said, still slouched against the wall -- Yukiko blinked at the red and black wheel of the Sharingan in his left eye, no longer hidden by his forehead-protector. "Good job on the summoning, but your friend went over the wall before your turn. Call the hawk back and leave."

"You can't prove anything."

Kakashi pointed at his left eye. "Actually, I can. Call the hawk back and leave." He straightened, the sudden threat in his posture unmistakable.

The Mist-nin gulped, then stuffed his fingers into his mouth and whistled. His teammates dragged him away, their faces promising retribution for his failure and their public humiliation.

Yukiko and Iruka looked at each other. "The Sharingan can see through genjutsu," Yukiko whispered. "This could be bad."

"Let's hope there are no Uchiha on the other side," Iruka said. He cast a speculative look at Naga. "Just in case... you said you could summon ravens. Can you use one as a scout?"

Naga scowled. "I said I'm _learning_ to summon ravens. All I can get so far is day-old hatchlings."

So that wouldn't work as a fall-back plan. Yukiko sighed, watching Kakashi warily; he _seemed_ absorbed in his book, but his left eye was still uncovered, the Sharingan recording and analyzing everything around him. "I guess we just have to hope for the best."

She looked at the gate -- only two genin were ahead of her team in line. "At least we don't have much longer to wait."


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter the Fifth, in which we finally get to see Yukiko in action, Iruka gets smacked around, Naga wins a fight, the team elects a leader, a dinner party is planned, and the author reveals Yukiko's hair color. Feel the suspense!

Kakashi raised a hand to the small radio transmitter in his ear, tapped it once, and waved at the gate, eyes never seeming to leave his book. "Next person, start now."

Yukiko took a deep breath and eased the gate open, slipping into the field. Before the gate even started to swing shut behind her, she dashed to the side, sliding between a bush and the wall. She couldn't afford to be spotted at this step of the game.

She had two objectives: get the scroll, and find the most direct route through the traps and guards so she could show it to Naga. If her genjutsu failed during Iruka's turn, he'd probably get through on his own. That was why he was going before Naga; he was a test subject.

First she needed to find the scroll. Yukiko formed seals, concentrated, and whispered, "Chameleon no Jutsu." This wasn't full invisibility -- the skill needed to completely remove your own presence without disrupting anything else in the environment was at least jounin-level -- but it was the next best thing. The colors of her clothing merged with the underbrush, the sound of her breath faded into the breeze, and all signs of her presence tangled into the background of the field. Yukiko _blended_.

It wasn't perfect -- Sharingan could see through it in a heartbeat, anyone looking from far enough away wouldn't be affected, and it was only an area illusion so she couldn't whisper into the chuunin's minds -- but it should conceal her from anyone close enough to be dangerous. And she'd be going cautiously anyway, so nobody in the distance should notice her even without the Chameleon genjutsu.

Now to get the lay of the land.

Yukiko scanned the ground, then dashed silently from her bush to the nearest tree, skipping over a mine and a pothole positioned to snap the ankles of the unwary. She marked them in her memory for later. The tree itself seemed safe, its single noose buried so thinly under dead leaves that Yukiko wondered how _anyone_ could miss it. Then she noticed the minor illusion hiding the explosive note set to stun anyone who tried climbing past the noose.

She grinned. Sneaky. But not sneaky enough.

Walking up the tree would make her too large a target, so Yukiko focused chakra into her hands and knees and crawled up instead. Her genjutsu wavered slightly, and she released the climbing jutsu as soon as she reached a high enough branch. She couldn't burn too much chakra on the test. She had to save enough to guide Naga through.

The tree offered a decent view of the test field, which was really more a small woodland than an open field. The academy needed pieces of different terrain for training children, and it was safer to keep them inside the village walls where the real dangers of the wild could be screened out. All Yukiko had to worry about here was her fellow humans.

The chuunin had cleaned up the debris of past explosions and the marks of previous fights quite well, not leaving any hints to reveal their traps. Two guards lurked ahead and to the side, one given away by a flash of sun on a forehead-protector, and the other betrayed by the overly-still leaves in his vicinity. He was trying too hard to be motionless.

Yukiko closed her eyes for a moment, constructing the superimposition genjutsu for later. She marked down the guards and the traps she'd avoided, fixing the image of the field into her memory the way she'd learned to remember the thousand and one details of her full-sensory illusions. This was easier in some ways -- she didn't have to fill in the background, since she wasn't changing it -- but it was hard to be sure her scale and proportion would match reality.

She opened her eyes and searched again. Where would they keep the scroll? Not along the walls -- they were too open. Probably not too high in the trees either. Would it be directly guarded, for better protection, or left alone to avoid drawing attention to its hiding place?

No way of knowing, really, but Yukiko didn't think it was with the two guards she'd spotted. She absently noted various traps nearby, marking them down in orange on her mental map, and crawled down to the lower branches of her tree. She wanted some height for better visibility, but if she went too high, the swaying branches would give her away as she moved; Chameleon couldn't cover anything too blatantly out of synch with her environment.

She gathered herself, ran along a branch, and cast herself into the air, diving, rolling, and jumping in an aerial obstacle course through the trees.

_This_ branch to _that_ branch to the next -- no, trap! -- twist in midair, grab for the trunk with a chakra-soaked hand, push off left -- to _that_ branch to _this_ branch -- dodge the noose, handspring over the jagged stump of a broken limb -- to _this_ branch to _that_ branch -- slide under the tripwire, mark the hanging log and flash bombs for later -- to _that_ branch to _this_ branch -- whoops, genjutsu! -- and tumble through the illusory tree and land, silently, in a crouch, kunai in her teeth and hands ready to shape seals.

Silence, save for the breeze rustling through the leaves. She was safe for the moment.

Yukiko slipped the kunai back into her holster and stood, sliding over to a nearby tree for shelter and scanning her position. She'd passed the two obvious guards, circling around the far side of the one with the glinting forehead-protector, and reached the heart of this tiny woodland. The air was thick with anticipation.

The scroll had to be nearby. Yukiko climbed partway up her new tree, buried herself in a thick tangle of leaves, and closed her eyes, reaching out to feel for chakra.

This was faster than a visual scan but it was dangerous; if she wasn't careful, didn't use the lightest possible touch, she could give away her own position as easily as she pinpointed her opponents. She spun her awareness feather-fine, thin as a spider web, and let her chakra drift outward through the trees. Two chuunin behind, where she'd already marked them. Four ahead: two mirroring the first two at the other side of the woodland, one at the gate, and one off to the side, near the ground and more tightly focused than the others, guarding something.

Yukiko snapped back to herself and opened her eyes. "Found you."

She set off through the trees again, more slowly than before but still fast enough to build momentum -- it was easier to make midair adjustments that way. Branch, trap, branch, branch, trunk, noose, tripwire, branch, branch, pressure plate, branch, genjutsu, trunk, branch, branch, and slow to a halt.

The guard was just up ahead, his chakra seeping slightly through the air though he was obviously trying to suppress it. Huh. The chuunin had to be getting tired, even if they switched off between runs. That was good. On the other hand, they had to have memorized all the good attack approaches by this point. That wasn't so good.

Yukiko checked her genjutsu, making sure it was still concealing her presence. That would help, but she needed to get the scroll without letting him notice or give an alarm. She'd either have to knock him out or put a really strong genjutsu on him.

She couldn't afford the chakra drain of a strong genjutsu.

Right. Knocking him out it was. Now, how to do that? Obviously not with ninjutsu. And since her taijutsu was, frankly, pathetic -- she did all right with inanimate objects like trees, but moving opponents were usually beyond her -- she'd have to get him on her first attack. Which meant she'd have to get very close without revealing her presence.

Hmm.

Yukiko crept along her branch, drawing on all her skill at stealth and silence. The guard -- a lanky teen with spiky brown hair -- was perched in a nearby tree, scroll strapped across his chest, and shuriken hooked between his fingers for instant attacks. His head snapped around at a rustle, hand pulling back to throw, but it was only a squirrel. He relaxed and sank back into the shadows, dull green vest blending with the leaves.

Yukiko grinned to herself. She had a plan.

Three interminable minutes later, she was perched on a branch above and to the side of the guard, Chameleon still concealing her. She gauged the distance, braced herself, and raced through five seals as quickly as possible.

A noose on the guard's other side snapped tight, hauling a surprised young woman into the air by her ankles. The guard tensed, turned... and relaxed when he realized he was in no danger, rocking back on his heels in relief.

The hilt of Yukiko's kunai slammed into the base of his skull and her body knocked him to the ground, her weight pinning him even as his head spun. Another impact rocked his jaw, and a steady pressure over his nose and mouth ushered him quietly into darkness.

Yukiko counted out the seconds, keeping a close eye on the pulse jumping in the guard's throat; she wanted him unconscious, not dead. When she was sure he was out, she unstrapped the scroll from his vest, wound hasty loops of wire around his wrists and ankles, and dashed away, scrambling up into the trees and resuming her obstacle course toward the far gate, marking traps as she went.

The next two watchers were no more trouble than the first two, and Yukiko dropped safely from the trees near the wall, using scrub bushes to hide her passage. She peered through the leaves, getting her first good look at the gate guard. The tall, blonde woman slouched against the wall, looking bored, arms folded over her vest and her split green skirt clinging to her black tights... wait a second, that was her old classmate Hikari! Shit. Hikari was a taijutsu expert and had always been hard to fool with genjutsu. Yukiko knew better than to assume Chameleon would protect her.

She needed a distraction.

Well, the trick worked once; why not try it again? Yukiko eased forward until she was within sprinting distance of the gate, made sure the scroll was firmly strapped to her back under her jacket, and shaped her five seals again.

A twig cracked to Hikari's right. When she turned, a young woman with blue-green hair leaped from the bushes to her left, hurled a handful of shuriken as a distraction, and dashed toward the gate. Hikari whipped around to meet her, settling into a taijutsu stance and smirking. As the familiar-looking woman started forming seals, Hikari felt a sudden brush of fabric behind her. She snapped her hand backwards, but the jacket she grabbed only held for a second before it hung limp in her hand.

"You lose," her opponent said, and faded. Genjutsu. Hikari cursed, shaking the brown windbreaker at the vanished illusion.

Behind her, the gate swung shut.

\---------------

Yukiko leaned against the wall, gulping for air. Hikari had almost caught her despite the two genjutsu; if Yukiko hadn't been wearing the scroll _under_ her jacket, if she hadn't slid her arms free of the fabric, she would have been helpless. Hikari had sensed her despite the distraction and there was no way Yukiko could beat the other woman in a straight fight.

But she'd won!

Yukiko unhooked the belt holding the scroll to her back, and looked up. A table stood in front of the gate, staffed by several chuunin, one of whom waved her over. "You have the scroll? Good. I'll call in the others and we'll get your score written up. You can wait over there with the other genin." He pointed to a set of picnic tables under a stand of sakura trees, where the genin were gathered, some happy, some morose, some very banged up, and many nibbling at the refreshments provided on the tables.

Yukiko handed over the scroll and waited for Hikari to return her windbreaker. Her old classmate strode through the gate, scowling. "Ayakawa Yukiko. I should have known it was you hiding behind those illusions; you never did have the nerve to fight face-to-face. When did _you_ decide to be a ninja again?"

"None of your business," Yukiko snapped. "My jacket?"

Hikari wadded the fabric into a ball and threw it toward Yukiko, who caught it, shook it out, and slipped it back on. She checked the pockets -- yes, the explosive notes, cord, and wire were undisturbed. Yukiko smiled at Hikari, making the other woman frown even more, and then wandered off toward the other genin, choosing an out of the way seat at the tables.

She had to be ready to start her genjutsu for Iruka and Naga, but she couldn't look like she was doing ninpou; even though the chuunin didn't seem to be paying attention to the genin, she didn't want to take any risks. The best thing, she decided, would be to act exhausted and pretend to sleep on crossed arms, letting her hair spread over them to cover any hand seals she made.

In all honesty, she was tired -- holding Chameleon that long, while also moving at high speed, dodging traps, and constructing a mental map would wear anyone down. She wished she had half of Naruto's stamina; the kid never seemed to run out of energy.

Yukiko untied her hair, let her head drop to the table, and placed her fingers together as if summoning chakra. Slowly, carefully, she pushed her awareness across the test field, searching for the sense of Iruka's chakra, that warm, thick syrup, laced through with bubbles, which hid something empty and aching. There. She laced her fingers into a seal, focused as tightly as she could, and wrote the kanji for 'success' in bright orange, floating in front of his eyes.

His chakra lurched, then shuddered in a pattern that usually accompanied laughter.

Yukiko dropped the genjutsu before Iruka could draw Kakashi's attention and get them disqualified. Teenagers. No matter how good they were as ninja, they still had no self-control whatsoever.

Iruka's chakra flared, then, and Yukiko wove her hands through the seals for a full genjutsu, as if she were going to twist all of his senses. She wanted that extra control to help narrow her focus. Her mental map of the field snapped into place, all the traps she'd found marked in glowing orange. She painted in the four watchers, Hikari, and the scroll guard in less vivid color, in case they moved between tests. This genjutsu had two parts -- life-size coloring of whatever Iruka was facing, and a tiny map that hung in the corner of his eye pointing out where he should go. Just to make sure he got the point, she drew an X beside the scroll guard.

"Hurry up, Iruka," Yukiko muttered, fingers fixed in the last seal. "I don't know how long I can hold this."

The map was easy, but the main genjutsu -- the marked, glowing traps -- was taxing her chakra and concentration. She had to build the entire landscape of the field and make sure that it moved with him. It was as if she was covering the whole field in a thin genjutsu, but she had to do it all in Iruka's head, affecting nobody's vision but his.

She was going to need a lot of aspirin when this was over.

It seemed like forever before Iruka flared his chakra again and Yukiko snapped her fingers apart, releasing the genjutsu. She looked at the gate, but it was still shut and Iruka hadn't come through. Someone had caught him.

A weight slammed into the wall, rattling the gate in its frame. Yukiko winced; Iruka was fighting Hikari. She hoped he didn't lose too badly.

The gate swung wide a few seconds later, and Hikari led a dazed Iruka through, supporting him as he sheathed his kodachi . They bowed to each other, Iruka handed over the scroll, and Hikari pointed out the tables. Yukiko waved her hand, calling him over.

"Are you okay? How did it work?" she asked.

Iruka rubbed the bridge of his nose. "I'll be fine. Don't try the main genjutsu on Naga -- it gave me a headache. Just use the map. Also, the scroll guard wasn't where you showed; he was on the other side of the woodland. Everything else was correct, but I think they move the scroll around to make cheating harder."

"That makes sense. And I'll be glad to drop the large genjutsu; it gives me a headache too!" Yukiko looked around. "I'm going to find Naga now. Tap me on the shoulder if anyone's watching too closely."

Iruka nodded, and Yukiko let her head drop back to her arms, blue-green hair pooling in a tiny tent over her hands. Fingers together, focus, ignore the pounding in her temples, and feel for Naga, find those layers of snakeskin and wariness, that hidden need. She formed a seal, tested the kanji, and smiled as Naga responded with a quiet swell of chakra.

"Did you jump when you saw the kanji?" Yukiko asked Iruka. "I'm pretty sure Naga didn't when I showed it to her just now."

"Um..."

"It doesn't matter if you were surprised. I'm just making small talk while-- oh, there she goes. Be quiet, please; I have to concentrate."

This time she painted nothing but the map, first showing Naga the overview of the field with five of the chuunin marked clearly and the scroll guard shown in an arc through the center of the woodland, accompanied by a question mark. Then she started writing in the air. 'Wait. I'll show you the path.'

Naga couldn't flare her chakra without attracting attention, but she managed to make it twitch almost exactly the same way she twitched her shoulder. Yukiko grinned. She expanded the map into a small scale replica of the view from the entrance gate and drew a path in purple, moving the viewpoint through the genjutsu as the line advanced. Traps lit up in orange as the purple line moved past them.

When she reached the area where the scroll guard had been, Yukiko let the line stop. 'The scroll guard moves. Find him, and take him out quietly.' Then the purple line resumed, snaking between the next two guards and dropping down to the ground near the exit gate. 'Watch for the last guard. Taijutsu expert,' Yukiko wrote.

She let the genjutsu lapse into the map, now with Naga's purple route weaving through the orange traps and guards. It was up to the girl; all Yukiko could do was hold the illusion and hope for the best.

Several minutes passed in silence, and then an explosion drifted over the wall. Iruka made a worried noise and Yukiko dropped her genjutsu, rubbing her temples to ease the pressure. "So much for being sneaky," she said. "I wonder if they give points for fighting your way out?"

"Probably. Kakashi-san did say we'd be judged on how far we got after we were noticed. And I nearly beat the gate guard; she was just a little too fast for me."

Yukiko grinned. "But not too fast for Naga, I bet."

"There is that," Iruka said, grinning back at her.

Several more explosions and a few bright flashes came from the field, and then the sounds of a brutal fight echoed just beyond the gate. Flesh smashed into flesh, and bodies slammed into the ground and the wall, accompanied by grunts and an occasional shout. Silence fell for a few tense seconds, and then Hikari flew through the gate and crashed into her fellow chuunin at the table, clearly unconscious.

Naga limped through after her, pants torn, knuckles bleeding, bangs stuck to her sweaty face, and golden eyes bright with righteous fury. "Can't beat a chuunin, can I? Take that!" She brandished the scroll at the other chuunin, who were staring in surprise. "Take this too. I win."

"Um, right," said the chuunin who'd taken the scroll from Yukiko. "Congratulations on making it through the field. Please... join your teammates over with the other genin." He pointed weakly toward the tables, where Yukiko and Iruka stood, waving.

Naga tossed him the scroll and limped over to her team. "The scroll person spotted me -- then I hit a tripwire while we were fighting. But I got the scroll, and I got out!"

"I'm impressed that you beat Hikari," Yukiko said. "She's always been fast."

Naga snorted. "I'm faster." Then she caught Iruka's eyes. "You were right. I wouldn't have made it through without Yukiko's help. I didn't see the first two watchers, I would've walked right into some of the traps, and it took me a while to find the scroll person."

Iruka blushed. "Well, we _are_ a team. I just wanted us all to do well."

"Don't put yourself down. It was a good plan."

Yukiko nodded. "Aside from the part where I ended up with a pounding headache, I agree completely. And Naga and I would never have thought of it. I think you should be our official leader from now on."

Iruka blushed harder. "But..."

"Go on, do it. You know strategy. I'm not a thinker and Yukiko only does little plans." Naga shot her cockeyed smile at Iruka. "Can't teach a class if you can't lead a team, right?"

"Okay," Iruka said reluctantly. "But if thing go wrong, I'm going to say 'I told you so.'"

Naga waved her hand. "Whatever. Now shut up -- I need to sleep."

\---------------

The sun hung low on the horizon by the time the last genin trudged through the gate, accompanied by the six chuunin guards. One of the chuunin at the table started scribbling notes as the guards reported the test results, while Hikari, now awake and bandaged, tapped a radio transmitter in her ear.

Kakashi materialized in a swirl of leaves, looking over the shoulder of the note-taking chuunin. The genin perked up, hoping the results would be announced soon. Yukiko blinked away her daydreams when Iruka poked her in the shoulder, and watched, amused, as he tried to wake Naga from her nap. The girl shot her arm out, wrapped it bonelessly around his wrist, and pinned his hand away from her. Iruka frowned.

"Let me," Yukiko said, forming a seal.

Naga jerked upright, looking around wildly. "Fire? Where?"

"Nowhere. But we needed you to wake up and let go of Iruka's hand."

"Genjutsu's cheating," Naga muttered, but she retracted her arm and slouched in a more or less upright position. "They announced the results yet?"

Iruka shook his head. "Not yet, but soon. That's why we woke you."

Just then a loud whistle pierced the quiet chatter, drawing attention to Kakashi and the chuunin at the evaluation table. "Teams are ranked by the total score of all three members," Kakashi said as he sat sideways on the edge of the table. "Decisions are final, so don't come crying to me if you disagree with your ranking. The top twenty teams will continue to the second test, which starts at nine o'clock tomorrow at the mission center.

"One: Uchiha Akaro, Hyuuga Shiro, and Aburame Kuroko of Hidden Leaf. Two: Aishou, Shinkan, and Mouten Junichi of Hidden Mist. Three: Umino Iruka, Tonoike Naga, and Ayakawa Yukiko of Hidden Leaf. Four--"

Yukiko was no longer listening. "We came in third! I don't believe it."

Iruka looked stunned, and Naga almost literally glowed. "We did it," she whispered. " _I_ did it. There _is_ still honor in the clan." She leaned over the table and flung her arms around Yukiko and Iruka, stretching to embrace them. "Thank you!"

"Thank you too," Yukiko said, embarrassed. "You fought well; that obviously earned points." She patted Naga's arm tentatively. "...Would you like to come to dinner to celebrate, both of you? My treat."

Naga nodded, beaming. Iruka also agreed, managing not to blush too badly, and Yukiko led her teammates off to her favorite sushi restaurant. They had passed the first test. Granted, they still had a long way to go, but they'd been ranked _third_ out of over fifty teams in a test that was aimed directly at one teammate's weaknesses.

Suddenly Yukiko had no worries about the second test at all.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter the Sixth, in which, to the author's bemusement, Yukiko gets sentimental, Gai appears, Kakashi tries to run away with the story, Iruka is adorably flustered, a fight scene is unavoidable, and the 'issues' surrounding Naga finally come to light. Sort of.

Yukiko slipped carefully into her apartment that night, not wanting to get caught by any of Naruto's traps. Oddly, the kid didn't seem to have done anything yet, and Yukiko grew increasingly nervous as she approached her bedroom. If the rest of the apartment was safe, he must have concentrated on just one room.

She eased the door open and angled her hand mirror to catch the glow of the streetlights.

Oh. No paint, no wires, no tricks. Just a blond kid in an orange jumpsuit curled up on her bed, hugging her pillow and a lightweight blue jacket.

He'd missed her. One day, and he'd missed her enough to sleep where signs of her presence would surround him. She wasn't even that kind to the kid, didn't hug him, didn't do anything special -- how lonely had he been that her fumbling efforts at being a guardian meant so much to him? How hard did he work to hide that ache behind his smiles and constant tricks?

Yukiko grabbed her pajamas, changed in the bathroom, and slipped back into the bedroom. She eased a spare pillow under Naruto's head and draped a blanket over him to keep out the night chill.

Then she dragged a few more extra blankets from her closet and camped out on the floor. It wouldn't be fair to wake the kid just to kick him out -- besides, Yukiko told herself, getting used to poor sleeping conditions was good practice for the second test.

...Oh, who was she kidding.

She just didn't have the heart to disturb him. Not when he clutched her jacket like he was drowning, the same way she'd clutched her parents' clothes when she finally cleaned out their closets for good. Not when he curled around the pillow like an uncaring kami might snatch it away from him, the same way she'd wrapped herself around Ame and Kasumi's chuunin vests after their funerals.

"Good night, kid," Yukiko whispered. "I won't leave you alone if you won't leave me."

Naruto shifted in his sleep, and she took it as an agreement.

\---------------

The second test started at nine o'clock; Yukiko was outside the mission center at eight thirty despite Naruto's myriad attempts to delay her.

"If it's at nine, why do you have to get there early?" he'd asked. "Tell me about the first test -- I'll make you ramen! I'll make you salad! ...I'll eat salad with you!"

"If I go early, I can look around for hints about the test," she'd told him, ruffling his hair. "You want me to pass, right?"

Eventually he'd let her go, waving and grinning madly as she walked away. She wondered, now, how much of that excitement was real and how much was a way to distract himself from being lonely.

Either way, it was exhausting to be around.

Iruka and Naga were waiting for her like the day before, leaning against the side wall of the mission room. Yukiko threaded her way past the other genin teams to join them. "Good morning. Do you have any idea what the test will be?"

"A mission, obviously," Naga said, looking up from her bandaged hands. "Or something like a mission."

"That's all anyone knows," Iruka agreed.

"So we wait." Yukiko sighed and slid down the wall to sit on the floor. Her pack was full, her weapons sharp, and her trap materials ready. There was nothing else she could do to prepare.

At nine sharp, a tall man with an unfortunate bowl haircut, a ridiculous green one-piece outfit, and striped orange legwarmers dashed into the room and struck a dramatic pose. "Welcome to the second test of the chuunin exam! The fiery spirit of youth will drive you to overcome all trials, and I, Maito Gai, the Beautiful Green Beast of Konoha, will guide you along your way!"

The Leaf genin experienced a concerted moment of shame for their village. The foreign ninja merely gaped in stupefied shock.

Gai beamed, revealing unnaturally shiny white teeth, and then sobered slightly. "The second test is a simulated A-rank escort mission, with a risk of assassination attempts, bandit attacks, and encounters with missing-nin. Twenty Leaf jounin will act as your clients, while chuunin of various villages will play the roles of bandits and assassins on your journey to Kashiwa, a village three days' walking distance from Konoha. If you take longer than five days to make the journey, you'll be disqualified. Also, killing will reduce your score; we'd like to end this exam with more chuunin than when we started, not fewer!

"You yourselves will act as missing-nin; if one team encounters another, you can eliminate them or 'kill' their client. If you lose your client, disabling other teams can improve your final score." Gai resumed his beaming smile. "But it's best to see your client safely to Kashiwa and complete your mission with the passion of youth!"

There was a collective blink.

"What happens if our 'clients' actually get injured?" a boy from Hidden Grass asked.

"They're jounin! Don't worry about it," Gai said. "But if that does happen, treat them as real clients. Your mission is to get them safely to Kashiwa; that includes medical care if necessary. They'll be here soon, but don't leave until I give the sign."

Yukiko looked at her teammates to see what they thought of this. Naga seemed eager, but Iruka looked skeptical. "This is a lot more complicated than my last chuunin exam," he said. "All we had to do that time was go into the Forest of Death and bring out a scroll. We didn't even necessarily have to find the hiding places, since we could ambush other teams."

"In my last chuunin exam, we had a simulated war," Yukiko said. "They split the teams into three sides, gave us each a territory, and had us try to take out our enemies."

Iruka winced. "That sounds brutal."

"It was. But only genin were involved -- I don't understand why they're using jounin and chuunin so much this year."

Naga twitched her shoulder. "How else can you do an escort mission? Can't use real civilians, and anyone below jounin could get killed."

"That makes sense, but I don't see why they couldn't pick a different type of mission to simulate. A courier mission, for example -- you can't kill a scroll."

"Who knows?" Iruka shrugged. "In any case, the 'clients' are here."

New Leaf-nin, presumably jounin, slipped through the room and attached themselves to the genin teams. Soon nineteen of the teams had a client and were huddling together to plan strategies.

Nobody had come to Yukiko's mismatched team as they leaned against the wall. They looked at each other, and then Iruka led them over to Gai. "Excuse me, Gai-san. Our client seems to be missing."

Gai lowered his thick brows, consulted a list, and frowned. "Late again, my eternal rival! How very modern of you." He patted Iruka on the shoulder. "Don't worry. You got Hatake Kakashi himself! He'll be here sooner or later."

"Sooner would be better," Naga muttered as they walked back to their spot against the wall.

"Really? I find that later works equally well," a new voice said from behind them. "I stopped along the way to admire the flowers; they get lonely if no one does that now and then."

"Kakashi-san!" Iruka gasped, whirling.

The silver-haired jounin seemed to be smiling behind his cloth facemask; his one visible eye was crinkled upward into a fat crescent. "Yo. And you're Umino Iruka, Tonoike Naga, and Ayakawa Yukiko. Tell me, how did you cheat on the first test?"

Yukiko gulped. "Who says we cheated?"

"Unless you're all experts at traps, scouting, and genjutsu, there's no other way you could have reached such a high team score. Besides, the chuunin reported that you followed suspiciously similar paths through the woodland." Kakashi slouched against the wall. "Don't worry -- you won't be disqualified now. I'm just curious."

"Yukiko _is_ an expert at traps and genjutsu," Iruka said slowly. "She went first, and then used an illusion to show us the way."

Kakashi blinked, then tipped his head in Yukiko's direction. "I thought I saw something around Iruka at one point, but it was too vague to be certain. Impressive."

Yukiko looked at her toes, unaccountably embarrassed. "...I'm not good at anything else," she said. "And I didn't start the real genjutsu until they were inside the field."

"Good planning, in that case."

"It was Iruka's plan. And Naga fought the guards all on her own."

Kakashi nodded again. "Good teamwork, too. You deserved your scores." He pulled a book from his pack and slouched further, looking more like a scruffy bum than a dangerous ninja. "I have the standard supplies a civilian brings on a three-day trip, but no weapons. Remember that during this test, I'm a civilian; you have to protect _me_. I won't let myself get killed, but I won't block any attacks that aren't potentially fatal." He flipped a page and started reading. "Make your plans and tell me when Gai gets around to letting us go."

On an unspoken impulse, the team moved slightly away from Kakashi. "What now?" Iruka asked quietly.

Naga's smile was a little larger than before, but still cockeyed. "You're the leader. Make a plan."

Iruka flushed. "Um. Okay. We have to travel through the forest to a village that's ordinarily three days away. We have to guard Kakashi-san from 'bandit' attacks -- which should be directed against us as well as him -- and from 'assassins' -- who'll only aim at him and will probably be a lot harder to detect. And we might be attacked by other genin."

He frowned, rubbing the scar across his nose. "Somebody will have to stay close to Kakashi-san and be ready to intercept attacks and weapons. The others will play scout and rear-guard... unless we want two people guarding Kakashi-san, in which case we'll only use a forward scout."

"That makes sense," Yukiko agreed. "Who takes which position?"

"I'll guard Kakashi," Naga said quickly. "I'm no good as a scout, and I can block attacks faster than you two."

Yukiko nodded. "You should be forward scout, Iruka. You can spot traps and enemies, and you have a better chance of fighting them than I do."

Iruka frowned. "That leaves you as rear-guard, Yukiko. Are you sure that's a good idea?"

"Skip the rear-guard and have her guard Kakashi with me," Naga said, twitching her shoulder. "She can keep a genjutsu up to confuse people and warn me if I need to move."

Iruka turned to Yukiko. "Can you hold a genjutsu all day?"

Yukiko shrugged. "That depends on the genjutsu. If you want something complicated, of course not. If you just want a small suggestion to overlook Kakashi-san, I can probably do that. But even that eats chakra over a whole day -- if I do that, I won't be able to split the watch at night."

"...And you'd already be tired if we get attacked." Iruka sank into thought, rubbing his scar again. "Okay. This is the plan: I'll travel in front as scout. If I find trouble, I'll signal -- what bird call will work best?"

"Crow," Naga said. "They're common, won't seem suspicious, and are easy to hear. Two caws, wait a beat, then a third."

"Okay. Meanwhile, you two stay with Kakashi-san. If I signal, prepare for a fight and move him to a defensible position. Yukiko, start a genjutsu to hide him, and hide yourself somewhere with a clear line of sight to hit any attackers. Naga, stay in the open to draw enemy fire. I'll move back to explain what I found or help fight."

Iruka looked at his teammates. "Does that make sense?"

They nodded.

"Then let's wait with Kakashi-san until it's time to leave."

\---------------

At nine thirty, Gai rounded up the teams and led them out through the massive gates of Konoha to the forest's edge. "Remember, your goal is the village of Kashiwa, three days' journey east. Your clients will now take you to your starting points -- we're separating you so the fiery passion of competition will be tempered by the caution of experience before you encounter each other. May the spirit of youth lead you to success!" He beamed. The genin responded with blank stares.

"Move out. Don't enter the forest until ten sharp, and I'll see you in Kashiwa!"

As Gai charged into the forest, the twenty teams scattered, heading north and south along the edge of the trees. Yukiko looked at Kakashi. "Where do we go?"

"Nowhere. Somebody has to be in the middle, and that's us." His eye crinkled in a smile. "On the bright side, you don't have to tire yourselves by walking before the test. On the less bright side, you have potential enemies on both sides and they'll all be heading toward you since you're on the direct route to Kashiwa."

Naga shot him a sour look. "That's very reassuring."

"My pleasure. Don't expect any more advice, though; from here on I'm just a civilian on my way home. But I was a witness to a crime near my last job so I may be a target for assassins." Kakashi smiled again. "Don't let me get killed; it would be inconvenient to track you to see how you compensate for that."

The three genin exchanged glances. "We'll do our best, Kakashi-san," Iruka said.

"Good. So... do you play cards?"

Nobody had any better ideas for passing the time, so Yukiko, Iruka, and Naga sat down to play poker for piles of twigs. Kakashi, they discovered, was a card sharp, and disturbingly skilled at calling a bluff. Iruka wasn't half bad either, particularly since his reaction to every hand, no matter how good or bad, was a slight blush; it was, as Kakashi remarked, difficult to look for a reliable tell when a person was being so amusingly distracting.

Yukiko still hadn't figured out if Iruka did that on purpose.

She and Naga quickly lost their store of twigs and watched as Kakashi whittled away Iruka's winnings, keeping up a running commentary and managing to fluster the boy enough that he stopped paying attention to whether Kakashi was bluffing or not.

"For a teacher, Iruka's easy to embarrass," Naga said, leaning over to whisper in Yukiko's ear. "My class would've walked all over him."

Yukiko shrugged. "Actually, he does really well with Naruto -- oh, you've never met Naruto, have you? He's the kid who left the paint in my office the day I met you. Anyway, Iruka's good at keeping him under control. I think he just doesn't know how to deal with adults."

"Or sex," Naga added, lips twitching into a smirk. "Kakashi just has to wink and he's red as a tomato!" She snickered. "Chains were definitely too kinky for him."

She was _not_ going to have this conversation with a thirteen year old girl. "Oh, look at the time!" Yukiko said loudly, standing and dusting off her pants. "It's a minute past ten; we're running behind."

Kakashi grumbled, but the genin hustled him into the forest, loosened their weapons, and fell into their prearranged spots: Yukiko to his left, Naga to his right, and Iruka up ahead, ranging from only a few feet away to out of sight in the distance.

The forest was a wild tangle of fast-growing maples, spindly birches, brambles, berries, creepers, and other opportunistic plants that had sprouted after the previous decade's wars had finally ended and training grounds became more important than a barren no-man's land surrounding the village. Sunlight filtered through the low canopy, green and dappled on the carpet of fallen leaves and ashy soil. Insects hummed in the fresh spring air, and wildlife rustled through the undergrowth in the distance.

There were no paths. There were never any paths leading to or from a hidden village -- ninja collected mission requests in neighboring towns, and any visitors were intercepted and escorted in via meandering routes to avoid the traps and deadfalls surrounding the village perimeter. It wouldn't do for outsiders to start taking ninja for granted, or for daimyo to decide the world would be simpler if they wiped out the ninja and hired samurai and thugs instead.

Konoha, like the other hidden villages, maintained a careful aura of mystique and inaccessibility. If you couldn't find the village, you couldn't attack the village. And the ninja could clearly find _you_ any time they wanted. Best not to make them angry.

Within an hour, the small team passed from the newly reclaimed forest into the old growth regions. Here the trees changed to oaks and elms, towering giants that spread their limbs out over yards of ground, their leaves casting deep shade to choke the life out of any upstart seedlings. The undergrowth thinned, only ferns and a few evergreen shrubs eking out enough light to survive in the spaces between the giant trees. Deprived of their easy cover and low-lying food, the animals vanished and an eerie silence pervaded the air.

Normally Leaf-nin would have taken to the trees, using the branches to gain cover and high ground over any potential enemies, but the team was escorting a 'civilian.' Never mind that Kakashi could slip through the branches like a ghost, leaving them all behind; he was pretending to be an ordinary man, earthbound, and Yukiko and Naga remained bound beside him.

Yukiko envied Iruka, who could fling himself through the air as he searched for the least obstructed route and circled around hunting for the pretend assassins and bandits they knew would be waiting.

He signaled once just past noon, the harsh calls of a crow prompting Yukiko to tug Kakashi into the shelter of a tree, disguise him, and disappear into the upper branches with a kunai clamped in her teeth and hands ready to form seals, while Naga stood loose-limbed to his side. When Iruka dropped from a tree, kodachi held ready, Yukiko nearly hurled the kunai at him before she recognized his ponytail.

"What was it?" she asked, dropping to the ground and releasing the genjutsu.

"Bandits, I think. I got them both -- they won't come after us once they wake up, right?"

"You took them out of the game; they'll head to Kashiwa to report on your skills," Kakashi said. He looked around the space under the spreading tree limbs. "Say, why don't we have lunch to celebrate?"

Iruka rubbed his nose in consternation, but agreed. They ate a brief lunch, with Iruka and Naga sitting next to Kakashi while Yukiko perched in the tree above them to keep watch. Kakashi finished first despite eating only with one hand; the other held his little orange book in front of his face.

"Are you paranoid about people seeing your mouth?" Naga asked after the fifth time he shifted the book to block her view of his face.

Kakashi blinked. "What?"

"Well, why else are you holding that book so close!"

"I haven't read this story before, and I'm sure Iruka wouldn't consider it suitable for young girls. It's all about sex, after all." His eye crinkled in a lazy smile. "If you really want, I can read it out loud..."

Naga looked at Iruka's spectacular flush and scowl, visibly considered the offer, and then twitched her shoulder. "No. Can't let you distract your guards."

"Your loss," Kakashi said, snapping the book shut and putting away his supplies. "So, when do you think we'll reach Kashiwa?"

"Sooner if we leave now," Iruka said, still scowling. "Let's go." Yukiko dropped from her branch as Iruka hurried out of sight.

\---------------

There was no warning, just a sudden flash of reflected sunlight in midair, glimpsed from the corner of Yukiko's eye. Without thinking, she threw herself at Kakashi, knocking him to the ground as the shuriken skimmed past bare inches from her shoulder.

"I'll flush him out -- guard Kakashi-san!" she snapped at Naga, and ran up the closest tree, forming a concealment genjutsu as she went. Focus, focus, push her chakra outward... there!

The assassin was dodging through the trees, balancing on elastic branches as he whipped shuriken and kunai toward Naga and the indistinct blur of color that marked Kakashi's prone body. Staying in the trees provided cover and rendered Naga's close combat skills useless, but it left one big vulnerability.

Yukiko braced herself against the tree trunk, wrapped her legs around a branch, and wove her fingers through seven seals. "Vertigo no Jutsu."

The world wavered, spun, and dropped from beneath her, gravity pulling in all directions at once, earth and sky fragmenting in her vision until her stomach rebelled and burning liquid rose into her throat, ears ringing and popping at the rapid changes in pressure as she spun through the chaos into the welcoming void of spreading darkness...

She felt, rather than heard, the impact as the assassin lost his balance and crashed to the forest floor.

Yukiko tore her fingers apart seconds before unconsciousness could claim her, and panted with the effort not to vomit. She _hated_ that jutsu, hated the way genjutsu strong enough to have physical effects always looped back on the caster, hated that it left her shaking and helpless, but it was a perfect weapon for this situation, when she had a teammate ready to watch her back and finish the fight.

The assassin reeled to his feet, shaking his head to clear the residual effects of the genjutsu. Drawing another handful of kunai from a holster, he ran at Naga, hurling the knives to cover his charge.

She dodged the kunai, except for the one that would have hit Kakashi -- that one she deflected with the edge of her hand. Blood trickled over her bandages as she spun and snapped a spear-hand toward the assassin's throat.

He twisted, dropping low to slide past her and reach Kakashi, but Naga swept her foot across his path, forcing the assassin into a flip.

In midair, he threw a kunai at Kakashi's gut; it sank into Naga's back instead as she dove over the jounin, tucking and rolling into a somersault and springing up off her hands to launch herself feet-first at the still-woozy assassin.

He stepped to the side and blocked, expecting to knock her off-balance and gain a second to recover, but her legs bent, boneless, cushioning the impact, and her arms shot out across the distance to wrap around his legs and jerk him to the ground.

He hesitated less than a second before drawing another kunai, but that was enough for Naga's tongue to whip forward and pin his arms to his sides and her foot to strike his jaw, dazing him again.

Naga waited, contorted, as Yukiko slowly climbed down from her tree and walked over, pulling a coil of wire from her jacket. Yukiko wrapped the assassin's ankles; then, as Naga held his own kunai to his throat, she pulled his hands behind his back and bound them too. For good measure, she sliced off part of his own shirt and gagged him. He might have accomplices, after all, and there was no point letting him call for help.

Yukiko slumped to the ground. "We forgot to call Iruka," she said absently. "He signals us with crow calls; how do we signal him?"

Naga shrugged. "More crow calls?" She raised her hands to her mouth and cawed, the raucous sound echoing out through the trees.

Behind them, Kakashi pushed himself upright and started dusting off his clothes. The assassin was glaring at Naga, sputtering around his gag.

"What do _you_ want?" Naga said, yanking out the fabric.

He coughed and spat weakly in her direction. "Snake tongue -- I know that bloodline limit. Traitor's blood! Did you laugh while that murderer butchered my family? Did you smile when he came home with bloody hands? Did you help him kill?"

Naga, already pale, went paper-white and jammed the gag back into his mouth.

Yukiko and Kakashi exchanged puzzled looks, but it was Iruka, just returned to check on his teammates, who asked, "Naga? What was that about? You haven't killed anyone, right?"


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter the Seventh, in which Naga acts her age, Orochimaru receives backstory (free of charge!), Kakashi manages to irritate everyone, Iruka copes with the pressures of command, and Yukiko does something massively stupid with a handful of explosive notes.

Naga, confident, brash Naga, wrapped her arms around her knees and shook.

Yukiko pinched the assassin's nose shut and laid her hand across his mouth, counting time until he fell unconscious; he had no need to be part of this conversation and after what he'd said to Naga, she really didn't want him awake at all.

"Naga?" Iruka said again. "It's all right, we trust you. Are you hurt?"

"She has a kunai in her back," Kakashi offered. "It seems to have missed the kidney."

"Right," Iruka said, moving over to the shaking girl. "Lie down on your stomach and I'll take care of this."

Slowly, Naga straightened herself and lay on the leaves carpeting the forest floor. "It isn't deep," she said quietly. "He didn't throw very hard." She shivered. "If he'd realized it was me..."

"Whatever he might or might not have realized, he's unconscious," Yukiko said, standing. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"I guess. You should know, in case it happens again." Naga winced as Iruka pulled the kunai from her back and lifted her shirt to examine the wound. She pushed his hands away and sat up so he could wrap bandages around her waist.

"It isn't about me. It's about my family. You heard what he said -- snake tongue -- traitor's blood. Have you heard of Orochimaru?"

Yukiko blinked. "Sarutobi-sama's student, one of the Three? ...Isn't he a missing-nin?"

"S-class missing-nin," Kakashi said blandly. "He killed a number of ninja, civilians, and children near the end of the wars, just before the Fourth Hokage was chosen, and escaped when the Third Hokage confronted him."

Naga nodded, blank-faced. "He's my mother's cousin. We're the last of the Sasayaki, and I'm the only one who shares his bloodline limit."

Oh.

"But that was almost ten years ago -- you were too young to have anything to do with it," Iruka said, sounding puzzled. "Why blame you?"

"They want to blame somebody. Naga's here, he isn't. They can hurt her, but hurting one of the Three? That's harder." Yukiko rolled the assassin over to lie face-down in the dirt, kicking him in the kidneys for good measure. "It's just like Naruto, and just as unfair."

Iruka was silent for several seconds, but the growing scowl on his face spoke volumes. He jerked the bandages tight around Naga's waist, tucking the end back under the wrapping and pinning it in place. "If anyone tries to hurt you again--" he started.

"I'll take care of it myself," Naga said, glaring at him. "Don't patronize me."

"Fascinating as this conversation is," Kakashi said, startling the team, who had largely been ignoring him, "we do have to reach Kashiwa at some point. I'm perfectly happy to be late, but you might have other ideas."

"...Right," Iruka said slowly. "Naga, will the wound keep you from fighting?"

"No!"

"Okay. Same positions as before, but _call_ me if someone attacks. The next assassin might not be alone."

With that comforting thought in mind, they resumed their journey through the eerily silent forest.

\---------------

The rest of the day passed uneventfully, and they halted as the sun perched on the horizon, bloated and orange, its rays slanting dimly through the trees and casting hundred-yard shadows that stretched forward into the thickening gloom. "There's a clearing ahead," Iruka said, "and beyond that the old growth starts to fade and the underbrush thickens. We could push on -- there might be better cover."

Yukiko shook her head. "Enemies might already be hiding in that cover. Let's wait until tomorrow, when we're rested."

Iruka agreed, so they made camp at the base of a giant oak, sheltering between two massive roots that thrust nearly three feet above the soil. It was far from perfect cover, but much better than nothing, especially after Yukiko circled the area with traps. By mutual agreement, they made no fire; it would only attract attention and reduce their own night vision.

Naga took first watch, Iruka second, and Yukiko third. She perched on a branch, letting her mind and awareness drift lightly through the area to snag occasionally on a passing squirrel or bird. If they didn't need to be unobtrusive, she might have used the animals as target practice, hoping to kill fresh meat for the morning meal -- ration bars, while healthy and compact, were distinctly unappetizing.

As the grey sky of false dawn, visible in tiny swatches through the forest canopy, brightened into rose and silvery-gold, Kakashi stirred, snapping Yukiko's attention back from her unfocused searching. She climbed down to the camp as he folded his blankets and stuffed them into his pack, pulling out his book in return.

"You're up early," Yukiko whispered, trying not to wake her teammates.

Kakashi shrugged. "Habit. Normally I'd sleep in, but this feels like a mission."

Some mission. He was probably used to hunting A- or S-class missing-nin, guarding feudal lords from real assassins, or fighting in the wars that had plagued the hidden villages for decades until the Fourth Hokage hammered out truces and peace treaties. He must be bored out of his mind, watching three genin muddle through a test he could pass in his sleep.

"It doesn't seem like much of a mission, just walking around and letting us do all the work. Aren't you bored?"

"A bit," Kakashi said as he flipped a page. "But it pays well. And I've been meaning to catch up on my reading for a few months."

" _That_ ," Yukiko said with melodramatic distaste, pointing at the little orange book, "is not reading. That is rotting your brain."

His uncovered eye twinkled at her. "I prefer to think of it as ripening."

"Pervert."

They sat in companionable silence for a few minutes, Kakashi reading and Yukiko watching the sky change from rose to lavender to blue, before she woke her teammates for breakfast.

\---------------

They moved cautiously out of the deep forest into the patch of scrubland, Iruka hanging close to his teammates so no one would be caught alone. Despite the danger of the situation, Kakashi seemed to delight in playing the infuriating client, responding slowly to directions, making excessive noise, and fidgeting when asked to remain still. "Every team gets a day of this," he said when Naga snapped at him. "I'll be good again tomorrow -- if I 'live' that long."

Iruka held up his hand, signaling a halt, and hurried back to the others. "I hear running water; I think we're approaching the river between Konoha and Kashiwa. Should we look for one of the bridges or climb down into the gorge?"

"You're the leader," Yukiko said. "Why do you keep asking us?"

"Because we haven't worked together long enough for me to know what to do in every situation!" Iruka flushed at his outburst. "Um. I'd rather cross directly -- the bridges are obvious spots for an ambush -- but can we guard Kakashi-san while we're halfway down a cliff?"

"Let's see this cliff before we decide," Yukiko said carefully.

The gorge, when they reached it, turned out to be fairly wide at this point in its course, and its western wall was more of a very steep hill, dotted with bushes and spindly trees, than an actual cliff. The eastern side, across the river, was much more forbidding: layers upon layers of crumbling shale rising vertically from a talus slope and at some points leaning forward to hang threateningly over the water.

"That," Naga said, "is not good."

Iruka looked at the gorge, looked at the team and a lazily blinking Kakashi, and rubbed the bridge of his nose. "Let's go north a little and see if the other side looks any better."

After fifteen minutes of nerve-wracking travel along the lip of the gorge, with Kakashi blithely crunching twigs and leaves underfoot, they stood across from a narrow defile in the eastern wall, which rose gently upward as it vanished back into the cliff. The three genin looked skeptically at the gap; it was convenient, it would save them the effort of climbing up a cliff wall... and it was an even more obvious spot for an ambush than a bridge would be.

But the cliff showed no signs of leveling to a more reasonable slope, and climbing shale was always risky; it would break under your fingers with the slightest pressure at the wrong spot. With Kakashi playing an incompetent, there was no way they could get him up without exposing themselves to unacceptable degrees.

"We'll have to go through there," Iruka concluded. "Yukiko, start a genjutsu when we break cover. I'll guard you. Naga, guard Kakashi-san. And Kakashi-san, please don't talk until we tell you it's safe."

Kakashi shrugged. Iruka rubbed his nose, but took that as agreement. "Let's go."

They eased down the western slope, wary of how exposed they were to anyone on top of the cliff across the river. The riverbank itself was thickly wooded, trees flourishing on the narrow strip of land at the bottom of the gorge, and the river was relatively shallow, rushing noisily over rocks and fallen branches. That was good, since Kakashi wasn't allowed to water-walk during the test and it would have been awkward to carry him over deep water.

After one last look around, Iruka nodded to Yukiko. She closed her eyes for concentration, let her chakra spill outward to spread the genjutsu, and formed the seals for the Wandering Eye. Instead of blending them into the environment, like Chameleon, this jutsu was a suggestion that made ambient sounds and sights more dramatic, more attention-grabbing, thus distracting watchers from the travelers.

It wasn't as effective as Chameleon, but it took less chakra so she could spread it over a greater area and hold it longer.

Yukiko opened her eyes, and Iruka waved the team forward. He and Naga stepped lightly on the surface of the river, while Kakashi splashed and slogged through the water, slipping on the muddy, plant-slick rocks under his feet. Yukiko, who was focused on holding the Wandering Eye genjutsu, hopped from stone to stone rather than burn chakra on water-walking. The natural noise and motion of the river helped cover Kakashi's lurching progress, but they were totally exposed. She couldn't afford to let the jutsu falter for an instant.

Once they reached the defile, Iruka picked up the pace, leading them over the uneven stones almost at a jog; Naga kept one hand on Kakashi's arm, steadying him whenever he deliberately stumbled. They had nearly reached the top of the gorge when the defile abruptly dead-ended in a sheer cliff that showed signs of water erosion.

"Runoff waterfall," Iruka muttered. "At least we're only fifteen feet down."

"Wonderful. How will we get out? I can't use chakra to climb while I'm holding the genjutsu over the area."

Iruka rubbed his scar, thinking. "Um... give me a coil of rope. I'll climb up, scout around, and then lower the rope for Kakashi-san. Naga can climb beside him, and then I'll bring you up too."

Yukiko pulled a coil of thin, colorless rope from her jacket and handed it to Iruka. "Hurry -- I'm getting tired." And something about the defile felt wrong; she wanted out.

Iruka made it safely to the top and vanished. Naga herded Kakashi into the shadows of a slight overhang, making him harder for potential assassins to spot, while Yukiko sat on a handy shelf of stone and wove her fingers through a set of seals, changing the form of her genjutsu. There were no waving leaves and moving water here to attract a searching eye, so she dropped the Wandering Eye in favor of the Shadow Cloak, blurring their forms into nondescript patches of darkness against the gray-brown shale.

The renewed disguise didn't ease the feeling of wrongness. The back of her neck itched, and something prickled in the corners of her eyes. Yukiko slipped her left hand into her pocket, checking her explosive notes and wires, and ran her right hand over her kunai holster, hooking her fingers through the hilt loops of five knives.

A crash sounded from above, followed by the choked-off call of a crow.

Yukiko and Naga stared at each other.

"You go! I'll guard Kakashi," Yukiko said, and Naga sprinted up the rock to rescue Iruka from whatever trouble he'd found. Yukiko nudged Kakashi further into the shadows, dropping her pack and stationing herself beside him.

"Just the two of us now," Kakashi said with a smile. "So tell me, how did a pretty young woman like you end up with such a patchwork team?"

"This is _not_ the time, you pervert! Be quiet," Yukiko whispered, drawing her handful of kunai. The air was too calm; she should have been able to hear at least _some_ noise from her teammates above, but the defile was deathly silent. She had to concentrate, but Kakashi was so _distracting!_

"Why shouldn't we talk? All the danger is up there -- who could find us down in the shadows?" Kakashi's one visible eye closed in a lazy wink.

A pebble shifted to her left.

Yukiko whipped her kunai toward the sudden movement, cursing as she finally spotted the slight shimmer in the air that betrayed a concealing genjutsu. A scimitar flashed, deflecting the knives, and a slim, broad-shouldered man -- a Sand-nin, by his heavy face paint and the symbol on his forehead-protector -- wavered into sight nearly ten feet from where his sword had been a second ago.

"Who could find you?" he said, smirking. "That would be me. Step aside, little kunoichi; my business is with your client, not with you."

Assassin. He was fast, he could make himself nearly invisible, and he had a sword. Yukiko swallowed as fear hollowed her insides and crashed into the pit of her stomach like a stone. She was in big trouble if Iruka and Naga didn't come back soon.

"My mission is to escort Kakashi-san safely to Kashiwa," she said, drawing another handful of kunai and hoping her voice didn't waver too badly. "I can't let you kill him." She couldn't let Iruka and Naga down; it didn't matter if _she_ failed the exam, but they deserved to be chuunin. She wasn't going to let anyone interfere with their dreams.

The assassin shrugged. "Too bad. I'll make your death swift." He held his scimitar crosswise, preparing for an attack. With his speed, Yukiko had no hope of dodging.

Only one chance, then. Yukiko clenched her left hand, folding down the corners of the explosive notes hidden in her sleeve, and held her five kunai loosely in her right hand. She planted herself in front of Kakashi and raised her arms. "Come and try."

The assassin smiled. "You're brave, I'll give you that. But you can't stop me." He raised his sword and charged.

Yukiko crossed her arms, right over left, and opened her left hand.

The explosion flung her back into Kakashi and sent them both smashing into the rocks, blinded by the flash and deafened by the bang. Her arm felt like it was torn to burning shreds, with specks of fire burrowing into the remnants of her bones and racing up through her shoulder where they clashed with the leaden ache of her collision with the cliff wall.

Yukiko forced herself upright, panting, and blinked, trying to see through the brilliant white haze floating before her eyes.

The assassin, blackened and swaying, stood several yards down the defile with two kunai in his shoulder, one in his chest, one in his gut, and one in his thigh. He eyed Yukiko with a sliver of respect. "That was either very clever or completely insane."

"I think insane is probably more accurate," Yukiko managed, tearing loose the remains of her jacket sleeve and pressing it against her burned, bloody arm. Behind the screen of fabric, she started forming seals, wincing as the movement pulled her torn muscles. "But it worked."

"For a moment, yes," the assassin said. "But only for a moment, and that's not good enough." He pulled the kunai from his body, glancing down with a grimace as one grated against a rib. "This time, little kunoichi, you die."

He charged again, fast enough to blur nearly out of sight, the air screaming as his sword sliced forward.

Yukiko sank to her knees, fingers locked into one last seal, as the assassin hurled himself face-first into the unforgiving rock wall of the defile.

"A moment's all I need, you overconfident bastard."

"That," Kakashi said, propping himself into a sitting position and wiping soot from his face, "was an interesting genjutsu. He went ten degrees left of where he wanted to go and was moving too fast to adjust. That could be useful. What made you think of distorting his movement instead of his perception?"

Yukiko glared at the jounin, too drained to be nervous about the exposed Sharingan in his left eye. "You copied my jutsu. You wouldn't be quiet, you kept me from noticing the assassin, you got me blown up, and now you copied my new jutsu! You... you _bastard_."

Kakashi shrugged. "Sometimes clients are like that. A chuunin has to be able to adapt to adverse circumstances; if you can't think on your feet, you'll never pass the test. So, what made you think of distorting his movement?"

Yukiko reached over to dig through her pack for some bandages, wincing as she pulled her abused muscles. "...He'd already seen through my Wandering Eye and Shadow Cloak, so I knew I couldn't fool his eyes," she said grudgingly. "He'd be expecting that. But even though he moved so fast when he attacked, he didn't avoid my kunai. I figured he committed everything to his attack and couldn't shift directions easily.

"So I just had to make him move in the wrong direction." She shrugged, then winced again and continued trying to wrap bandages one-handed.

Kakashi nodded, slipping his forehead protector back over his left eye. "Good thinking. Not many people realize that speed can have disadvantages."

"Yukiko! Kakashi-san!" Iruka's frantic voice rang through the defile, and he jumped down to meet them; Naga remained above, sitting on the edge of the cliff. "We heard the explosion -- you're hurt! -- what happened?"

"Assassin," Yukiko said, tipping her head toward the bleeding, battered man. "He was hiding under genjutsu and attacked when you left."

Iruka rubbed his nose and scowled. "I _knew_ there was something fishy about the way the other one tried to lead Naga and me away. How did you stop him?"

Yukiko held up her sloppily bandaged arm. "Kunai and explosive notes. Then I made him run in the wrong direction."

"I see." Iruka frowned, but didn't press for details. Yukiko was grateful; if she'd let the assassin at Kakashi, they would have failed the test, but if she hadn't gotten lucky with the explosion, he might well have killed her. The chuunin exam was always potentially deadly -- they all knew that from experience -- but there was no need for Iruka and Naga to know just how close that encounter had been. Worrying wouldn't help anyone.

Iruka tugged the bandage roll from Yukiko's hands and began rewrapping her arm properly. She held herself as still as possible, hissing through her teeth when he jarred her sore shoulder. He tied off the bandage, and then used a scrap of excess fabric to wipe at the blood and soot on her face and neck.

"...Your jacket looks a bit battered," Iruka said, sitting back. He raised his sooty hand to his nose, stopped, and then scratched awkwardly at the back of his head.

"Yeah," Yukiko said, looking at herself. "Maybe I should tear off the other sleeve so it matches."

"That'd look good," Naga said from above. "Like a chuunin vest."

Yukiko tipped her head back and smiled up at the girl. "You're right. You know what? I think it's a sign that we'll pass this test -- the kami are trying to give us the right uniforms already."

"Ahem."

They turned to look at Kakashi, who was still sitting slumped against the rocks. "I hate to interrupt this touching moment of team solidarity, but I am still your client and I have injuries that need to be tended. I'd also like to point out that we're still at the bottom of a defile where I just almost died."

He attempted to look pathetic; Yukiko and Iruka watched him skeptically. "I'm scared of dead bodies!" he whined, unable to disguise the smile crinkling his eye. "Get me out of here! You're supposed to be protecting me better than this!"

"You sure there's a rule against killing clients?" Naga asked, kicking her heels against the rocks. "We could pretend the assassin won."

Iruka flushed. "We can't kill Kakashi-san, Naga. It would defeat the purpose of this test."

Naga aimed her cockeyed smile at Kakashi, her eyes cold. "You heard Iruka. You're safe for now, but you almost got Yukiko killed -- after this test, I'm going to _hurt_ you."

Kakashi blinked lazily. "You can try. I might even let you touch me."

Naga scowled, but she tossed down the rope when Iruka asked and contented herself with 'accidentally' knocking Kakashi to the ground as she helped him over the edge of the defile. She smirked, but behind her, Kakashi's grin -- obvious even under his mask -- made it clear she'd only succeeded because he let her.

Yukiko suppressed a sigh. She really wanted this test to be over. After spending this long with her teammates and Kakashi, Naruto's jokes and hyperactivity would almost be a relief, and what _that_ said about her state of mind didn't bear thinking about.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter the Eighth, in which we meet the team that doesn't play well with others, Iruka displays his mastery of puppy-dog eyes, Naga gives Gai a nickname, Yukiko buys souvenirs, and the author has fun inventing political and economic systems for the hidden villages.

"Bandits to the north," Iruka said, swinging down unexpectedly from a large branch. He anchored himself by his feet and faced his teammates upside-down. "It's a group of seven, and they seem to be plotting something."

A cockeyed smile spread across Naga's face. "Let's interrupt them."

Yukiko reached over and whapped the girl with her good arm. "We're supposed to avoid trouble, not go looking for it. Besides, your back is still hurt and my left arm's useless." And they were all too jumpy to fight at their best, but Naga wouldn't take that well.

A quiet afternoon and night hadn't done much to reduce the tension after the gorge. Naga was spoiling for a fight, fists clenching at random moments. Iruka was, for once, not flushing at the slightest provocation, and his hands strayed from his shuriken holster to his kodachi and back. Yukiko kept seeing false genjutsu traces everywhere she looked, constantly setting herself on edge. Only Kakashi seemed unaffected by the experience, and even he was being quieter out of what passed for his sense of courtesy.

"They're heading toward Kashiwa. We'll probably run into them sooner or later." Iruka shrugged. "It might as well be on our terms, not theirs."

"And what are we supposed to do with Kakashi while we're fighting?" Yukiko asked. "I'd guard him, but I'm even less use than usual right now."

"You're not useless," Naga said, shaking her head firmly. "Nobody on our team is useless."

"Right," Iruka said from his branch. "Besides, if we attack them, you can stay out of the way under a genjutsu. They won't even think to look for you." He flipped to the ground and gave Yukiko a pleading look.

He was far too adorable for his own good. And that expression was an _exact_ duplicate of the one Naruto used to talk her into serving extra portions of ramen instead of other, more nutritious foods. Yukiko wavered; she could usually stand up to the kid, but something about Iruka's face doubled the force of the puppy eyes.

Besides, he had a point -- if the bandits were moving east, it was better to catch them now when they were off guard, rather than later when they'd had time to set an ambush.

"Oh, fine. But I want to be within earshot in case an assassin is lurking."

Iruka nodded and set off through the forest, leading the way to the bandits' current position. Naga followed in the trees, shadowing Yukiko and Kakashi as they walked on the ground, his footsteps deliberately stirring the leaves into soft whispers -- not obtrusively, but just enough to remind the team that he was playing a civilian and needed to be watched.

\---------------

The bandits had stopped for lunch when Iruka pointed them out from a safe distance. "You see?" he said. "Naga and I can catch them by surprise. We'll leave a larger gap to the north, so if any _do_ escape, they'll head away from you and Kakashi-san."

Yukiko shrugged, then winced as the motion set her shoulder throbbing in renewed pain. "Fine. But I need you to haul Kakashi up into the trees first. I want the extra cover, and I can't exactly pull him up myself."

Kakashi was duly hoisted onto a wide branch, where he immediately leaned against the tree trunk and pulled out his little orange book. Yukiko sighed, and he winked at her. "What else am I supposed to do?" he asked.

He did have a point.

Yukiko settled a few feet further out on the branch, crouched in a ready position despite the protests of her bruised sides and back. "I'm going to hide us with the Chameleon genjutsu," she said, forming seals. "I'm sure you know the limitations, so please don't push them."

"So I should hold back on any moans of pleasure?"

"Pervert," Yukiko muttered. "Save it for Iruka; I'm not angry enough to care right now."

Kakashi sighed and turned his attention back to his book.

A minute passed in silence, and then a sudden rustle of leaves snagged Yukiko's attention. A branch on the next tree over shook slightly and she caught a glimpse of black hair and a patch of white before the person settled into stillness.

Assassin? If so, he was either clumsy or trying to lull her into false confidence. Yukiko started to thin her awareness, to spin a tiny strand of chakra across the gap between trees and investigate this new factor.

Two people! One was tightly controlled, prickling with the sensation of an active jutsu. Yukiko snapped her attention away and touched the other person, whose chakra felt... odd. Organized, and yet wide open, as if not making the slightest effort to hide...

Just like Kakashi's signature behind her, actually.

Oh, shit. They'd finally run across another group of genin and their jounin 'client.' And if one genin was hiding with the client instead of moving forward, Yukiko would bet the entire mortgage value of her building that the other two were sneaking up on the same bandit group Iruka and Naga were going to attack.

This could be trouble.

Yellow-white light flashed through the trees, followed a second later by the roar and shock of an exploding fire. Ninjutsu fire techniques, and high-level ones to cause that much damage. Yukiko hoped Iruka and Naga could move fast enough to dodge the flames, or that Iruka knew a water or earth-based jutsu to quench or smother the fire.

The genin and the jounin client remained calm, their chakra unruffled, as if they'd been expecting something to explode. And they were just one tree over, waiting for the rest of their team to return, the same way Yukiko was waiting for _her_ team.

This could definitely be trouble.

She slipped back and tapped Kakashi on the shoulder, motioning him to put his book away. He sighed, but tucked the little orange book into his pack and raised an eyebrow at Yukiko. She pointed at the hidden genin and client, raised two fingers, and then waved toward the bandits and shrugged.

Trees shook on both sides of her hiding place, and four figures dropped into the small clearing, Iruka and Naga coming from the south while two black-haired figures wearing Konoha's symbol -- one female, one male -- arrived from the north. All four seemed startled, but quickly hid it and tensed for a fight.

"You stinking liar, Akaro," Naga said, glaring. "You said you wouldn't follow us."

The spiky-haired boy sneered. "Oh, we're liars? I think you're following _us_." He glanced around the clearing, eyes skipping lightly over his hidden teammate and fixing on Yukiko and Kakashi. He stared straight at her for several seconds, the red and black wheel of the Sharingan spinning in his eyes, and then looked back to Naga.

"Then again, maybe your partner's just incompetent," he said, "and you're hoping I'll be able to find her for you."

"Bastard," Naga snarled, twitching forward.

Akaro grinned, raising his hands into the first seal of a fire jutsu, but his partner laid her hand on his arm above his fingerless glove. "Stand down." Her voice was quiet but firm.

"I don't take orders from you, Kuroko!"

The girl frowned slightly, and something black and glittering poured from her loose sleeve to Akaro's bare skin. "Stand down. We're doing well; there's no need to interfere with ninja from our own village and risk getting injured."

"Like they could hurt us!"

Iruka scowled, one hand drifting to the hilts of his kodachi. "I wouldn't be so sure of that, Uchiha Akaro. As I recall, you depend on your Sharingan and can't defend well against pure taijutsu or weapons."

"He's right," Kuroko said. "Stand down, Akaro, or I'll make you stand down."

The glittering blackness spread further up Akaro's arm, chittering, and Yukiko shuddered when she realized it wasn't a shadow or a ninjutsu -- it was a swarm of insects. She could almost feel phantom legs and wings brushing her skin, and was incredibly glad Kuroko didn't want to fight. Facing potential death was one thing. Facing bugs... well, everybody had their little phobias. She was usually all right so long as she had some newspaper to swat them with, but a swarm was a bit more than Yukiko was prepared to think about.

Akaro seemed to share her revulsion, since he grimaced and broke his seal, using his hands to sweep the bugs off his arm. "Oh, fine. You can come down now," he added, looking up at Yukiko.

Kuroko nodded politely when Yukiko dropped her genjutsu and pushed aside the leaves that screened her and Kakashi from sight. Iruka helped Kakashi down from the tree while Yukiko dropped to the ground, spilling chakra into her legs to keep from jolting her injured arm.

Akaro scowled. "I don't know _why_ you think we couldn't take them. I knew where she was all along, her arm's useless, and they don't have a clue where Shiro's hiding."

"You mean the two people over there?" Yukiko asked, pointing at the neighboring tree. "I found them five minutes ago."

She smiled at Akaro's stunned expression.

"You see?" Iruka said calmly. "You depend too much on your Sharingan, neglect your other skills, and underestimate your opponents."

"You should listen to him, Akaro," the third genin said, appearing from a cluster of leaves and lowering an attractive but hard-faced young woman to the ground. "Besides, what's the point of sabotaging Leaf-nin? We should veer north again and take out that team from Hidden Mist." He dropped lightly to the ground and tucked his hands into the pockets of his white windbreaker.

"Oh, shut up, Shiro," Akaro grumbled. "You're not Mister Perfect -- you're the one who got spotted trying to hide. What happened to 'Don't worry, I have the Byakugan, I can see anyone trying to sneak up on me'?"

Shiro narrowed his blank white eyes. "You know I haven't learned to see through genjutsu yet -- not all of us have flashy shortcuts like you. Now shut up yourself and let's get back to finishing the test."

Naga, who'd been grinning as she watched the team squabble, nodded. "Yeah. You want to go north? We'll go southeast. See you in Kashiwa -- _if_ you make it."

"If we make it! You little freak!" Akaro started forming seals again, but Shiro reached over and poked him three times in the side while Kuroko let bugs pour out of her sleeves again and hover around his shoulders.

"Stand down, kid," the hard-faced woman said from where she was leaning against a tree by Kakashi's side. "Hyuuga just jolted your inner coils and you _know_ Aburame's kikkai can eat chakra as fast as you generate it. Chuunin know when not to push their luck."

Akaro lowered his hands and stalked off to the northeast. "Fine, whatever. You catch up to me when you're done talking to the enemy."

The woman shook her head. "The enemy? Since when are Leaf-nin the enemy? I swear, I don't know what's gotten into kids these days. Are yours as bad as these three, Kakashi?"

Kakashi blinked thoughtfully. "Not really. Their individual skills may not be as strong but they have much better teamwork -- and not all of them are children." He winked suggestively at Yukiko, who rolled her eyes.

The woman sighed. "You get all the luck."

"Hey," Naga said, waving her hands. "Don't talk about us like we're not here."

The woman glanced at her, then blinked and gave her a closer look. "Sasayaki?"

Naga tensed; Yukiko and Iruka stepped closer to her, hands straying toward their weapons. "What's it to you?" Naga asked.

"...Just old memories. Don't worry about it." The woman turned to Shiro and Kuroko, licking her lips and grinning in a rather unsettling manner. "So, do you two care enough about your team to go find that idiot Uchiha, or are we going to push on without him?"

Kuroko and Shiro exchanged glances. "We'll go northeast," Kuroko said eventually. "If it's pointless to attack other Leaf-nin, it's even more pointless to let our partner get himself killed because he didn't wait for backup." She turned back to Iruka, Naga, and Yukiko, bowed, and said, "Good luck, and thanks for your help with those bandits."

Shiro nodded once and the hard-faced woman waved as they walked out of the clearing.

Naga waited until they were out of earshot before pinning Kakashi with a glare. "Who was that, what does she know about my family, and why does she care?"

Kakashi shrugged, still slouched against the tree. "Mitarashi Anko, Orochimaru's student."

Naga blinked. "He had a student? Wait, why don't people hate her instead of me?"

"Who said they don't?" Kakashi stretched his arms over his head, and took a few steps away from the tree. "Shouldn't we be moving? The others have enough of a head start by now."

Naga glared, but Iruka tapped her shoulder and she held her tongue, falling into place beside Kakashi. Yukiko moved up to his right -- she couldn't be on the left because of her injured arm -- and smiled sympathetically behind Kakashi's shoulders.

"I can't wait to get to Kashiwa," she said. "I want a hot bath and a real roof over my head."

"I'll settle for getting away from our 'client,'" Naga said.

Yukiko eyed Kakashi consideringly. "I can see what you mean, but I think hot baths are more important. After all, he's only an irritating person. A good bathhouse, on the other hand, is a gift from heaven -- so long as no perverts try to peep in..."

Kakashi's eye narrowed, and then he attempted -- unsuccessfully -- to look cute and harmless.

Yukiko and Naga exchanged grins and proceeded to talk about various ways to torture men caught looking into the women's sections of bathhouses, blithely ignoring Kakashi's discomfort.

\---------------

They reached the outskirts of Kashiwa as dusk crept up the edges of the sky to tint the fading sunlight with hints of blue and stretch nets of shadow through the trees. Several enterprising groups of 'bandits' had set ambushes along the easiest paths through the tangled undergrowth, which Iruka spotted easily. Naga wanted to fight them, but Yukiko managed to convince her not to waste time on unnecessary battles. They slipped around one ambush under a genjutsu screen, traced a crazy, winding path through the minimal cover of Kashiwa's fields and pastures, and reappeared as if from thin air twenty feet from the village gates.

Kashiwa wasn't nearly as large or important as Konoha -- it existed mainly to provide a marketplace for the local farmers, fishers, and woodsmen -- but it was, like all villages in Fire Country, ringed by a massive wall. Decades of war, and centuries of feudal lawlessness before the establishment of the hidden villages, had made walls necessary for generations. In the past few years there had been movements to tear them down, but people had long memories and in any case the walls had become an integral part of traditional Fire Country architecture.

There had never been any question of removing or lowering Konoha's walls -- ninja couldn't afford to trust the new peace -- but Kashiwa was a less vulnerable target and was trying to project a welcoming image to encourage trade. The village wall was only half as high as Konoha's, and was painted with brilliantly colored murals of Fire Country history, as if to de-emphasize its original purpose.

"You'd think they could get the Hokage portraits right," Iruka said thoughtfully, looking at the small section depicting Konoha as the nation's strength and shield. "They're not that far from Konoha, and it's hard to miss the faces on the Hokage monument."

Naga twitched her shoulder. "They probably didn't get the others right either -- I _know_ the Fire Lord's wife isn't that pretty."

Yukiko privately agreed, having spent several infuriating D-class missions retrieving cats for the woman in question and then watching her gush over the helpless animals. "In any case, let's get Kakashi into the village before it's completely dark. I assume you'll take us to an assigned meeting place?"

Kakashi nodded and ambled forward to greet the ninja on guard duty, a thirty-something genin whose forehead-protector also bore the symbol of the Leaf. It wasn't something most people realized, since the missions weren't particularly glamorous, but long-term guard postings brought in a significant percent of Konoha's profits. They also absorbed the genin who never passed the chuunin exam, thus keeping them from causing trouble in Konoha itself, or reminding fledgling ninja that rising through the ranks was more difficult than they imagined.

Yukiko studied the genin covertly as he led them through the streets of Kashiwa. If she hadn't retired, she might well have ended up in his position, far from home and bored out of her mind. She'd still be a ninja, which earned some automatic respect outside the hidden villages, but she didn't think that was worth the trade-off. She'd take her apartment building over his job any day.

Which led her to wonder what she'd do after this exam. Did she really want to be a ninja? Yes, she loved the rush of a good fight and the thrill of outwitting an opponent, but most missions were weeks of boredom for only a few hours of excitement. And most missions carried the risk of having to kill people -- granted, true assassination jobs tended to go to Anbu members, but people didn't hire guards because they thought they might trip over a rock and break their necks. They hired guards because other people wanted to kill them -- and the only sure way to stop an assassin was death.

If she failed the exam, Yukiko figured she'd just go back to taking care of her apartment. She might even expand her operations -- she'd been toying with the idea of buying the neighboring building, fixing it up, and renting out the ground floor as a restaurant or shop of some sort. Naruto would be disappointed that she had no plans to take the exam again, but he'd get over it sooner or later.

But if she passed, if she could actually be a chuunin, what then? She'd be expected to plan and lead missions, not just serve as someone else's soldier. She'd be away from her building for weeks and months on end. Kami preserve her, she'd have to hire Yusuke as a full-time superintendent or Uncle Yutaro would never let her hear the end of it.

And she'd have to leave Naruto alone. The kid was only six years old, he'd never had a real friend or parent-figure, and she'd be abandoning him. Yeah, so Iruka would still be around teaching at the academy, but he'd have to come over specially to see Naruto instead of being there automatically. That wasn't enough for any kid, and certainly not for her family!

Yukiko blinked.

Did she just think of the kid as part of her family?

Well, in a certain way he _was_ , wasn't he? She saw him a lot more often than any of her blood relatives, somehow she'd ended up caring about him, and he'd latched onto her as a sort of big sister or surrogate mother. He was as much her family as Ame and Kasumi had been, and she'd never had trouble admitting how close she was to them.

Yes, Yukiko decided, Naruto was family. Family she'd chosen, family she _wanted_ , not just people tied together by chance and blood.

As their escort ushered the team into a fenced-off campsite behind the guard barracks, Yukiko felt a huge smile spread across her face.

\---------------

Three other genin teams had already finished the test and claimed some of the small three-person tents. Kuroko, Shiro, and Akaro were ignoring each other outside the tent closest to the campsite entrance; two Mist-nin were dozing nearby while their third teammate kept watch; and a team of Grass-nin had pinned up the front flaps of the tent farthest from the gate and were playing a pattern game with colored sticks. All three teams kept wary eyes on the new arrivals, until Iruka chose a tent halfway between the Grass-nin and Mist-nin, and set down his pack. Apparently nobody wanted to be too close to any other team.

"This is where I leave you," Kakashi said as Yukiko and Iruka started pinning up the tent flaps. "I have to report your actions to Gai. But since you're the fourth team here, I haven't died, and you're not dead either, I wouldn't worry too much."

Naga shot a sour look at his back as he ambled away. "I wasn't going to worry anyway. If he weren't a jounin..."

"Don't worry about it. We're here and we're safe -- that's the important part," Iruka said, flushing slightly as he smiled. "Let's see if they'll feed us a real dinner or if we're stuck with ration bars again."

The guard barracks turned out to have food -- a potluck of dishes contributed by the people of Kashiwa -- and Yukiko ate more unagi than she probably should have. Iruka, unsurprisingly, chose ramen, while Naga pounced on a platter of teriyaki beef strips and grilled vegetables.

Two more genin teams -- Sand-nin and more Mist-nin -- limped in during dinner, their members looking more torn-up and battered than anyone already there, even accounting for Yukiko's injured left arm. "We really did do well," she said to Iruka and Naga. "I wonder what happened to some of them?"

Naga shrugged. "Who cares? I just hope people don't take forever to get here -- or that green idiot gives out results before then."

"He can't until the five days are up," Iruka said, looking up from his ramen bowl. Then he frowned. "I hope winning fights and finishing quickly earns a high score -- some teams may be going slowly so they avoid all fights."

"I think that would be hard -- remember how the assassins surprised us? Besides, being sneaky is good but they don't want chuunin who can't handle themselves in a fight. Peace may not last forever," Yukiko said.

Iruka frowned again. "There's no reason it couldn't. Anyway, the Kage and the Masters are probably more worried about handling assassins than about potential wars."

That was true, Yukiko thought, though she was less optimistic than Iruka about the nations' ability not to provoke each other into violence. Still, if enough people like him taught enough children to share his views, maybe he'd be right in the end. It was a nice dream, in any case -- that she'd never have to live through another war, and that Naruto would never have to know the heartbreak of losing friends and family to endless battles.

Time seemed to drag its feet through the next two days while the genin teams trickled into Kashiwa and waited for Gai to announce their scores. The green-clad jounin was surprisingly hard to find for a man so loud and flamboyant, but he could occasionally be seen on random street corners and in various food stands conferring with the jounin 'clients' and various chuunin who'd acted as bandits and assassins.

At one point, while the team was wandering through the village, Yukiko spotted Gai at a sukiyaki stand with the chuunin 'assassin' who'd accused Naga of murder. She quickly steered her teammates down a side street, talking loudly about the souvenir stand she just _had_ to look at. She ended up buying a ridiculous frog-shaped coin purse to cover that move, but she thought it was definitely worth the strange looks Naga and Iruka gave her.

Besides, the kid would be thrilled to get a present.

Finally, just past sunset of the fifth day, Gai sent the local guards to round up the genin teams. They stood nervously in the main room of the barracks, waiting to hear their fate.

Gai leaped onto a table and struck a dramatic pose. "You all showed the great strength and promise of youth! But not everyone can pass the test, so some of you will have to return home and train with passion for the next exam.

"The four teams with the highest scores will continue to the third test. First, Aishou, Shinkan, and Mouten Junichi of Hidden Mist! Second, Hino Suisen, Nagoyaka Kafunnokaze, and Makiba Kohaku of Hidden Grass! Third, Uchiha Akaro, Hyuuga Shiro, and Aburame Kuroko of Hidden Leaf! And fourth, Umino Iruka, Tonoike Naga, and Ayakawa Yukiko, also of Hidden Leaf!"

Cheers, sighs, and groans rolled through the room as the genin realized they'd passed or failed. Naga clutched Yukiko and Iruka, quivering with excitement.

Gai waved for silence, light glinting off his teeth as he smiled. "The third test will be the usual tournament-style fights one month from now in Konoha. Everyone else is free to return home or stay to watch the test, enjoying Fire Country's open-hearted hospitality!" He struck another pose, then vanished in a puff of smoke.

Several genin were glaring at the victorious teams, so Yukiko dragged her partners outside and several streets away from the barracks.

"We passed!" Naga said, beaming. "Not that I thought we wouldn't -- but we passed!"

Iruka flushed and rubbed his scar. "Yes, we did. But we still have one more test, and I think it's the hardest."

"It is," Yukiko agreed. "At least in the other tests you know what they're looking for, but sometimes even the people who win the tournament don't become chuunin."

Naga shrugged. "So we fight our best and hope. Shouldn't be too hard."

But it would be, Yukiko thought as they left for Konoha the next morning. It would be very hard -- they wouldn't have teamwork to rely on anymore, and they each had serious weaknesses they'd relied on the others to compensate for. Naga was vulnerable to any ninjutsu she couldn't dodge, since she didn't have any jutsu of her own to use as counters, and was equally vulnerable to any genjutsu or concealment techniques. Iruka was the best rounded of their team, but he didn't have any special techniques to finish a fight quickly. Like Naga, he'd probably need to be in close range to win, and that left him vulnerable to jutsu.

As for Yukiko herself, the one time she'd reached the third test -- the year before her parents died, the year Ame and Kasumi became chuunin -- she'd squeaked through the first round by confusing her opponent, but then she'd faced an Uchiha whose Sharingan rendered her genjutsu useless. The red-eyed girl had strolled across the arena, laughed as she avoided Yukiko's kunai, and smirked when her hand flashed out to slam Yukiko into unconsciousness.

Yukiko's taijutsu and weapon skills hadn't improved over the years; if anything, they'd grown worse through lack of practice. She had nothing to fall back on besides her genjutsu, nothing besides that trick with kunai and explosive notes she'd used back in the gorge, and that hurt her nearly as much as her opponent.

Maybe she should just withdraw from the tournament -- it wasn't as if she'd be hurting Iruka and Naga's chances at this point. She'd spare herself needless pain and humiliation and she could switch her attention back to business matters instead of wasting a month on training and impossible dreams. She could make sure Naruto was behaving himself...

Yukiko sighed, thinking about the kid. He'd never respect her if she quit now. And while it was silly to push on because of a six year old kid's opinion, she thought that maybe, if she quit, she wouldn't respect herself either.

Yusuke would get to manage her building for at least another month.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter the Ninth, in which Naruto is unspeakably cute, Yukiko and her cousin gossip about their family, Iruka is sneaky, Naga summons a raven, the author makes assumptions about the social structure of Konoha, and Gai and Kakashi don't actually appear.

"Yukiko-san, Yukiko-san! You're back! You won, right? Hey, hey, is your arm okay?"

Naruto barely stopped himself from crashing into Yukiko as she stood in her apartment doorway two days after leaving Kashiwa. The village was three days' walking distance from Konoha, but without the need to keep a civilian's pace, the genin had raced back in a day and a half. She'd stopped by the hospital to get her arm checked again -- the Kashiwa guards had only a basic first aid station, and the village doctor sent tricky cases to Konoha anyway -- and a medic-nin had applied a mixture of herbs, potions, and seals to repair the burns and torn muscles, wrapped her arm in a sling, and ordered Yukiko not to break the seals for a week.

She'd agreed, haggled out a bill payment at the front desk, and hurried home, eager to see how Yusuke was handling her building and what Naruto had done in her absence. It seemed he'd been living in her rooms and skipping school. Yukiko grinned and tapped his nose with her good hand; he scrunched up his face and grinned back.

"It's good to see you too, kid. We came in fourth. My arm's hurt, so don't bump into me, but I'll be okay pretty soon. And shouldn't you be in school?"

Naruto bounced on his toes. "Yeah, yeah, but it's _boring_. So you're a chuunin now, Yukiko-san?"

Yukiko shook her head, leaning against the doorframe. "No, not yet. I still have to pass the third test."

"But you're hurt! That's not fair, making you fight again when your arm's all hurt."

Yukiko grinned at the scowling kid. "You're right, it wouldn't be very fair -- which is why the third test isn't until a month from now. That means Iruka and Naga will be over here most days to practice, and if you're very good -- if you stop skipping school and sneaking out for ramen instead of eating your vegetables -- you can help us. How does that sound?"

"I can help? Really? Thanks, Yukiko-san!" Naruto beamed and threw his arms around her waist in a hug. "Hey, hey, so I gotta get to school," -- he grimaced at the idea -- "but you gotta tell me everything when I get back. Um, and watch out. I made a lot of traps, and they're really good, but your arm's hurt, and I didn't know that, and--"

"Kid, I'll be careful, I promise," Yukiko said, cutting off his jumbled warning. "Now shoo."

Naruto rushed out the door in a blur of orange and noise, hurtling past the bemused tenants in the lobby. Yukiko smiled apologetically at them and they nodded back, accustomed to the kid by now. They didn't like him and many pretended he wasn't there, but nobody had argued when Yukiko told them to keep any nasty comments to themselves the way they'd do for any of her other tenants.

The smile lingered as she inched her bedroom door open and reached up to steady the bucket of paint before it could spill onto her head. It was good to be home.

\---------------

"Yusuke?" Yukiko knocked on the doorframe as she peered into her office. "Are you in there?"

A narrow-faced teenager looked up from a jumble of papers on the desk, blinked, and then grinned. "Yukiko! I didn't know when you were coming back or I'd've asked Yura to make mochi or that green tea ice cream you like. Do you know how to fix radiators without shutting off steam to the whole building? Also, the monthly electric bill came but I couldn't pay it because I don't have access to the building account."

Yukiko grinned at her cousin. "I'm going to need you at least one more month, so remind me to fix that tomorrow afternoon -- we'll drop by the bank and get you set up. As for the radiators, there are shut-off valves on each unit, but you can also cut off each floor individually, front or back, to work on the inter-unit pipes. Who complained, and what's wrong?"

Yusuke pulled a notepad from beside the telephone. "Tsubume Emi-san in 3-F. She says the bathroom radiator is knocking against the walls again when the heat comes on, and she wants you to stop the noise." He looked at Yukiko, eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "Why does she have the heat on that high in this weather?"

"That's one of life's great mysteries," Yukiko said, groaning. "Kami, I hate Emi. Her radiator wouldn't be a problem if she'd just use the insulation sheet I got her -- it reflects heat back into the room and it muffles the noise -- but she says it collects dust. One of these days I'm going to break down and have central air installed."

"That'd be a big, expensive mess, and probably not worth the bother," Yusuke said, "but whatever. You can deal with Emi-san later -- I want to hear about your ninja thing! Did you pass the exam? Who's on your team? What happened to your arm?"

"The exam's not over yet, my team passed the second test, my teammates are Umino Iruka and Tonoike Naga, and I did something massively stupid with a handful of explosive notes."

Yusuke looked pointedly at her sling. "Yeah, stupid sounds right, but did it work?"

"Well... yes." Yukiko smiled at the memory. "Knocked the bastard ten yards away with kunai sticking in his chest, and then I used genjutsu to trick him into running into a cliff wall."

"That is _so_ cool."

"You'd better not let Uncle Yutaro hear you say that -- he might think you want to be a ninja too."

"Nah, the old man knows better," Yusuke said. He leaned back in the chair and folded his hands behind his head; the sleeves of his oversized, tie-dyed shirt sagged down around his elbows. "I don't want to do anything where people try to kill me -- I just like hearing about you being an idiot."

Yukiko snorted. "Brat. Your familial love and support are overwhelming me. Speaking of which, how is everyone? I haven't seen any of you lately."

"You just don't want to run into the old man," Yusuke said with a sly grin. "You should've heard him when he told me I'd be working here -- 'Your cousin is throwing away her life, wasting her time on that soul-sucking shinobi nonsense, frittering away her business opportunities to play childish games...'"

Yukiko groaned, and Yusuke took pity on her. "Hey, it's not any more fun for us -- we _live_ with him. Anyway, Yuichiro and Mei are doing well -- there's good money in clothing repair -- and they're trying for a baby. That's going to be _so_ weird, being an uncle, and Yuichiro as a father is _so_ wrong."

Perfectionist, worrywart Yuichiro dealing with the chaos of children was definitely a strange idea, but Yukiko felt she ought to defend him -- she owed her cousin for letting her practice taijutsu and illusions on him, something that had landed them both in trouble fairly often. "You never know -- he might relax once he has an heir. Uncle Yutaro might let up on him."

Yusuke rolled his eyes. "The old man let up on anyone? Dream on. Anyway, Yura's started selling packaged desserts on the side. She says it's to exploit a niche market, but I think she just got bored cooking only noodles. She's still seeing that Iinuzuka jerk, but I don't think it'll last -- he's always gone, she hates worrying when he's on missions, and the old man's stopped yelling at her for following your example, so I think she's getting bored of him too.

"Yume's going to apprentice to a hairdresser once school lets out, unless the old man and Yuichiro talk her into working at the cloth shop. They're planning to tempt her with a chance to design outfits, but I think she's on to them. Although," Yusuke said, with a thoughtful air, "she might agree anyway. She's gone awfully girly lately and she _does_ like clothes."

"There's nothing wrong with liking clothes and hair," Yukiko said. "In fact, you could do with a bit of Yume's advice -- your outfit's terrible."

Yusuke grinned. "Say that again when your jacket isn't blown up and I might listen."

Yukiko looked at herself objectively -- battered brown jacket over a torn green shirt, dusty black pants with tattered cuffs, and mud-caked sandals -- and flushed. "Cut me some slack, Yusuke -- I just got back from Kashiwa. All I did was dump my pack and wash my face."

"Yeah, whatever. Anyway, Yui's gone crazy about the grocery store. She clerks, she stocks shelves, she's bugging the old man to let her track sales and make orders, she wants to start seasonal decorating themes and home deliveries -- she's driving everyone nuts."

"Huh. You weren't any better when you were eleven," Yukiko said. She started to cross her arms, then remembered her sling and braced her good arm against the doorframe instead. "You decided you were going to move out on your own and started skipping school to do odd jobs all over town. At least Yui's still getting an education."

"Hey, if ninja can start real work at eleven or twelve, I don't see why the rest of us are stuck in school until we're sixteen."

Oh, not this again. Every one of her cousins was secretly jealous that she'd been out in the real world at twelve while they were stuck behind desks or doing unpaid grunt-work for Uncle Yutaro. They didn't realize they were the lucky ones. "You really want to know? It's because otherwise you'd do the odd jobs they use to train genin in teamwork. It's because ninja have to start young, to take advantage of strength and flexibility. And it's because you need more knowledge -- reading, math, things like that -- to run a business than to kill people."

Yukiko straightened from her slouch, trying to emphasize her seriousness. "That's what ninja do -- kill people. That's all we're good for. Sometimes we kill people in order to protect other people, but ultimately we only destroy things. _You_ , on the other hand, can create things and keep them running. Don't ever think that's not important."

Yusuke pushed the chair back and stood up to meet Yukiko's eyes. "Yeah, I know. You think I don't hear this from the old man every week? I'm just blowing hot air and you know it, Yukiko. Besides, why are you still all anti-ninja? If you're trying out for chuunin, shouldn't you be a little more proud of what you do?"

"Um..."

Yusuke grinned. "You are _such_ an idiot."

She was _not_ an... well, maybe she was. Yukiko sighed. She was so used to convincing herself she didn't regret giving up her dreams that she was still trying to tell herself ninja were ultimately useless. "Okay, so ninja have our own skills that have to be learned through experience instead of in classrooms. And we protect people, we can use chakra to do impossible jobs, and we save a lot of lives, especially medic-nin. But other jobs are still important, and honestly, it was a _lot_ harder learning to manage an apartment building than it was learning to fight."

"I believe that!" Yusuke said, nodding. "It's kind of fun to be in charge and it's _so_ cool to get exempt from afternoon lessons, but I don't know _how_ you deal with these people. I've only been doing this for six days, and they're driving me crazy! Especially the fox-brat -- he kept coming in and asking questions in this incredibly annoying voice, and he wouldn't go away when I said I was busy. I had to push him out and lock the door to get some work done."

Yukiko felt her face freeze. Slowly, carefully, she asked, "Are you talking about Uzumaki Naruto? Blond, lives in 7-J, wears orange all the time?"

"Yeah, that's him. He's the Kyuubi, right? I sort of remember the name, and he has those creepy whisker marks."

"You pushed Naruto out the door."

"Yeah, because he wouldn't go away and I didn't want him behind me." Yusuke frowned at Yukiko's expression. "Hey, I didn't yell or hit him -- if he pays rent I won't say anything against him -- but really, you can't expect me to be friends with a demon. I don't have any fancy ninpou to protect me. Besides, sealed or not, he killed Mother."

Yukiko counted to ten, inhaled, counted to ten again, and then released her breath. "Okay. You didn't actually hurt him so I'm not going to fire you, but I'm not happy. Listen, Naruto is _not_ the Kyuubi. He's the Kyuubi's prison. Any kid could have the fox trapped inside, but Naruto had the bad luck to be born on the right day. He's a six year old boy, everyone hates him, and he has _no idea why_. Think about that for a minute. And don't ever touch him again."

Yukiko held Yusuke's eyes. "Are we clear?"

Yusuke nodded. "Yeah, we're clear, whatever. No touching." He raked his hands through his navy-blue hair and shifted his feet uncomfortably; Yukiko knew she wasn't going to like what he had to say, and Yusuke obviously knew it too, but he seemed determined to say it.

He looked up, completely serious for the first time in the conversation. "Listen, Yukiko, I know you like the brat. But even if he was normal once, he's had the fox in him for six years. There's no way it hasn't done something to him. Normal kids don't have whiskers. Who knows what it could make him do? And if the fox ever breaks out, I don't want it to know who the hell I am or anything about the family. So you keep him away from me, I won't touch him, and we'll all be happy. Deal?"

Yukiko counted to ten again, and stuck out her good hand. "Deal."

They shook to seal it, and then Yusuke ostentatiously shuffled some papers on the desk. "So, about that radiator..."

Yukiko attempted a smile, grateful for the subject change. "Right, Emi's radiator. Come on and we'll take a look at it. And you can tell me all about Yura and that Iinuzuka boy."

\---------------

The next morning, Yukiko rousted Naruto from bed, glared him into eating miso instead of ramen for breakfast, and -- not quite trusting him to behave instead of sneaking back to watch her team practice -- walked him to school and asked his teacher to help her. If the kid came home without a daily note swearing he'd been in all his classes, she'd know he was sneaking out. And then... then she'd get _creative_.

Naruto gulped, then grinned and told her he'd figure out how to make a fake note by tomorrow.

"Lots of luck, kid," Yukiko said, exchanging winks with the retired chuunin who taught Naruto's class. The kid might be a genius at practical jokes and sneaking around, but forging the chakra signature on Otsumo-sensei's notes was a little beyond his skills.

Iruka and Naga were waiting out back when she returned to her building, Naga frowning at a scraggly young bird in her hands and Iruka attempting to throw shuriken under the cover of a wide-front fire jutsu.

"I hope you have some water on hand," Yukiko said, ghosting up behind him.

"Good morning, Yukiko. I have two buckets at the back door, and I already soaked the target tree," Iruka said calmly, then walked over to cool and retrieve his shuriken. Yukiko pouted; she'd hoped he was distracted enough that she could surprise him.

"So, any luck with the summoning?" she asked Naga.

Naga held her cupped hands out toward Yukiko; the scraggly black bird cocked its head and examined her, turning its head back and forth to peer at her from both eyes. "This is Akaruime," Naga said. "He's a few weeks old, better than I used to do. At least he can talk. But I want a raven that can fly."

"Learning!" the raven croaked. "Soon!"

Naga stroked its head with her fingertip. "I know. But soon isn't now."

"Still, any progress is a good sign, and you're getting to know each other for when he does learn to fly," Iruka said, joining them. "Now that we're all here, I think we should talk about the other genin we may be facing. If we know their skills, it's easier to plan a good defense and attack. Naga, you know the most about the Leaf-nin. I'll research the Mist-nin and Yukiko, you can research the Grass-nin."

"How? They won't be in the bingo books -- they're only genin. I could probably hide myself and spy on them, but that's hard if I don't know where they're training," Yukiko said.

Iruka attempted a superior smirk; he didn't quite pull it off, but it was a nevertheless a creditable attempt. "We ask their jounin 'clients' from the second test -- or if they're on missions, we can ask Maito Gai-san. I'm sure he'll be willing to help the passionate youth of Konoha strive for victory!"

Naga shot him a sour look; her miniature raven echoed the gesture. "It's not funny when he talks like that. Don't you start."

"Yes, please don't," Yukiko said. "But it's a good idea -- let's go."

Gai was nowhere to be found and the mission center staff refused to say which jounin had dealt with which genin, but they were able to get Gai's address and leave a message in his mailbox; if he wasn't away on a mission, Iruka said with satisfaction, they should get an answer the next day.

"So the green idiot finds us tomorrow," Naga said as they walked back to Yukiko's building. "What should we do until then? Play poker?"

Iruka held up his hand before Yukiko could answer. "Shh. Look down the alley."

Yukiko peered covertly down the narrow passage between a flower shop and a luggage store; a small orange figure darted from behind a trashcan to the shadow of a recessed doorway, heading away from them. She hissed and started forward, but Iruka snagged her jacket sleeve, shook his head, and grinned.

"Let me." He ghosted along the walls, black clothes blending into the shadows cast by the overhanging balconies and roofs, and grabbed Naruto from behind, slapping a hand over the kid's mouth to keep him quiet. "I didn't expect to meet you here, Naruto-kun," he said as he carried the struggling boy back to the street, "and I don't think Yukiko did either."

Naruto froze when he spotted Yukiko; she frowned. "What are you doing out of school, kid?"

Naruto gaped for a few seconds before coming up with an excuse. "Um... I'm practicing! Ninja have to be sneaky, so I'm being sneaky! Otsumo-sensei didn't even see me leave -- you're a good teacher, Yukiko-san!" Naruto snickered to himself before noticing that Yukiko wasn't laughing. "Hey, hey, I was gonna go back!"

"You know, he might be telling the truth," Iruka said, still grinning. "Ichiraku ramen stand is just around the corner, and it _is_ lunch time."

Naruto nodded frantically. "Yeah, yeah! I just wanted ramen, not your stupid bento! Um, not that you can't cook, Yukiko-san, 'cause you're a good cook, but you should cook more ramen and not vegetables and seaweed. You make great ramen!"

Naga was trying to muffle a laugh behind her raised hands, and Yukiko rolled her eyes heavenward. "Kami, why me? Okay, kid, I'll let you off easy today -- I'll even buy ramen for you -- but if you keep doing this, I'll ask Otsumo-sensei to tie you to your chair."

"Ramen! You're the best Yukiko-san!" Naruto slithered out of Iruka's grip and hugged Yukiko around the waist; he had an awfully strong grip for a kid that small. "And I don't care if Otsumo-sensei ties me up -- it's good practice getting out of traps!"

"The brat's got a point," Naga said with a cockeyed grin. "He might not be half bad as a shinobi."

Naruto pouted. "Hey, hey, I'm gonna be a great ninja. I'm gonna be _Hokage!_ "

"Yeah, right. Dream on, brat." Naga reached over and ruffled Naruto's spiky hair.

"I'm not a brat!" Naruto scowled, ducked away from her hand, and kicked at Naga's shin, baring his teeth when she lazily stepped aside. "You take that back!"

Yukiko sighed. "Naruto, stop attacking Naga or I won't buy you ramen. And Naga, please be nice."

"No ramen? I'll be good! Ramen, ramen, ramen!" Naruto was easily distracted, easily pleased, and easily bundled back to school after lunch, with an apology to Otsumo-san for his behavior.

"That kid is a terror," Naga said as they left the school. "What do you two see in him?"

"Determination. And a very lonely boy," Iruka said, his eyes going distant. "When I lost my parents I still had my clan, but Naruto-kun has nobody except for us."

"And Sarutobi Hokage-sama, but he doesn't have the time to be a real presence in Naruto's life," Yukiko added. "People hate Naruto for things that aren't his fault, somewhat like your and your relative. But he has a good heart, and I wish I had half his enthusiasm."

"People hate him? Why?" Naga frowned in confusion and fiddled with one of her earrings. "He's incredibly annoying, but that's not worth hating him."

Yukiko and Iruka exchanged looks; Naga was apparently too young to remember what had happened to the Kyuubi, and if she didn't know, they weren't allowed to tell her. The Third Hokage was probably trying to keep adults from turning their children against Naruto when he made that law, but children didn't need a tangible reason to dislike him. They just followed their parents' lead. And now Naga, who had more reason to sympathize with Naruto than most people, couldn't learn the truth.

"His family... had a curse," Yukiko improvised. "People are afraid that it might become active again, which would make him very dangerous."

"That brat, dangerous? Are they crazy?"

"No," Yukiko said softly, thinking of Yusuke and his worry about the family, thinking of Ame and Kasumi burned, trampled, and torn to shreds. "No, just scared. The last time the curse was active... it was very bad."

"Oh."

They walked in silence for a minute before Iruka cleared his throat. "In any case, we should get back to training. Until we hear from Gai-san, I think we should work on our weaknesses."

"Sounds good," Naga said.

Yukiko hastily agreed.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter the Tenth, in which Yukiko practices kata, Kakashi has an unfortunate encounter with hair dye, Iruka loses his temper, Naga learns Go, Naruto finally figures out the secret of Yukiko's squeaky floor tiles, and Gai doesn't walk around the village walls 100 times on his hands.

Yukiko needed to improve her taijutsu -- there was no way, she said, that she'd be able to learn any effective ninjutsu in only a month. Iruka disagreed. "You don't need anything flashy, but you should learn at least one jutsu -- something to amplify any weapon strikes, to make yourself a little bit faster, or to block attacks," he said.

Naga looked skeptical. "Ninjutsu's hard enough on its own. You want to make Yukiko stick chakra into a weapon?"

"Not exactly. I thought that she might use a small fire jutsu to heat her kunai and shuriken, or a wind jutsu to either push herself out of the way or send her opponent off-course."

Yukiko shook her head. "It's a nice idea, but it won't work. Trust me, I'm terrible at ninjutsu -- I just don't have the knack for using chakra to create physical effects. Why do you think I concentrated on genjutsu?"

Now Iruka looked skeptical. "You can't be that bad."

"Want to bet?" Yukiko centered herself, drew up her chakra, and formed the seals for a basic fire jutsu, the one most ninja learned so they wouldn't have to carry matches around. She pursed her lips, pictured a tongue of flame... and blew a thin stream of dry, lukewarm air with a faint tinge of smoke.

She smiled. "Hey, I got smoke. Usually I'm lucky if the air comes out dry."

Naga snickered. Iruka looked stunned. "That's... that's the easiest jutsu..."

"Exactly," Yukiko said, gently whapping Naga with her bandaged arm. "And I can't do it -- I _told_ you I'm terrible at ninjutsu. I can't even do Henge properly; I cheat by using genjutsu to cover up the flaws. I only mastered Kawarimi because I couldn't graduate otherwise, and then my jounin-sensei _beat_ tree-climbing and water-walking into me. I've never managed any other jutsu -- well, in the summer I can cool my office a few degrees, but that's pretty pathetic considering that the jutsu I use is meant to coat things in a meter of ice."

"Pathetic is right," Naga said, grinning. "Even I'm not that bad at ninjutsu -- I just don't like it."

Iruka coughed. "Right. And that's something _you_ need to work on. You rely on taijutsu, but if you can't see your opponent, or if he's out of reach, you're in trouble."

"Out of my reach? That's hard to manage," Naga said, snaking her arm out and wrapping it around a branch on the other side of the yard. She snapped off a twig and dumped it onto Iruka's head as she reshaped herself to normal. "See?"

"Yes, but do you have leverage?"

Yukiko and Naga looked blankly at Iruka. He sighed. "Look, if I rush at you, you can use my momentum to flip me over your body. But if I'm ten yards away, even if you reach me all you can do is tie me up or use your hand strength. You can't put your whole body behind your attacks and that makes you vulnerable."

Comprehension dawned on Naga's face, and she twitched her shoulders irritably. "Okay. How do I fix that?"

"You use ninjutsu or weapons, something that works from a distance," Iruka said.

"And you should work on strategy," Yukiko added. "Remember the day we met? I caught you with genjutsu and you didn't think about the situation -- you just tried to hit me. Sometimes you can't win with a direct attack."

"Great," Naga muttered, scowling. "So I need to think and Yukiko needs to kick ass. What about you, Iruka?"

He flushed and scratched the base of his ponytail. "Um..."

"Confidence," Yukiko said with a grin. "He needs to work on his confidence. And integrating his skills -- he's good with weapons and his jutsu aren't bad, but he doesn't use them together."

Naga perked up and shot Iruka a speculative look. "Hmm. I bet I know something else he should fix..."

"Oh?" Iruka asked warily.

Naga fluttered her eyelashes, arched her back, and smiled at him. "Come home with me tonight and I'll show you, Iruka-kun. I'm sure you'll pick it up in no time, with your _sword skills_."

"Ack!"

"Naga, that wasn't nice," Yukiko said, trying to sound severe -- thirteen year old girls shouldn't be thinking that much about sex -- but it was hard to restrain her laughter at Iruka's spectacular flush and panicked hand-waving. Still... "You shouldn't tease your teammates."

"Really?" a new voice asked. "Who should she tease, then?"

"Kakashi!" Naga glared up at the silver-haired jounin, who was stretched out lazily on a tree branch over her head, little orange book held open in his hand. "What are you doing in Yukiko's yard, you asshole?"

Kakashi shrugged, which looked very odd from a horizontal position. "I happened to overhear Gai lamenting that he didn't have time to help the passionate youth of Konoha strive for victory, and cleverly deduced that he was talking about you. Being a kind, thoughtful man, I decided to check up on you for him."

"You mean you looked through his mail and you're bored," Naga said.

"Well, that is one interpretation," Kakashi admitted. He snapped his book shut, vanished it, and leapt to the ground. "But since I really am a kind, thoughtful man, and you don't have a jounin-sensei, I'm offering my services as a training advisor. When should we start?"

Naga sputtered with frustration. "We've done fine on our own -- who says we need you!"

"Then I suppose you _don't_ want the reports on the Mist-nin and Grass-nin," Kakashi said mournfully, staring at the sheaf of papers that suddenly appeared in his hand. "And after I went to all the trouble of liberating them..."

"Excuse us a minute, please," Yukiko said. She dragged Iruka and Naga to the other side of the yard. "Listen, I know he's a jerk. And he probably shouldn't have those reports. But we need every advantage we can get."

Iruka rubbed his scar, forehead furrowed with concentration. "I don't like it. If Kakashi-san really is here because Gai-san is too busy to help us, that's one thing, but if he's only trying to stir up trouble, we should turn him down. Politely," he added, frowning at Naga.

She twitched her shoulder. "I don't see why you care -- he's a jerk. But maybe he can help Yukiko with her ninjutsu." Then a grin slid across her face. "And maybe he'll piss you off enough you'll figure out how to stand up to people, Iruka- _chan_."

Iruka flushed and scowled. "Just because I'm not as rude as you are--"

"Let's go ask Kakashi exactly where he got those reports," Yukiko said hastily before they could really start arguing.

"You don't need to ask -- I'll be happy to tell you," Kakashi said from right behind her shoulder. Yukiko whirled in shock, hands rising to defend herself; Kakashi blinked and slid back a pace. "Hmm. You seem jumpy -- maybe you should all sit down and relax."

"You... you _bastard_ ," Yukiko panted, trying to calm her racing heart. "Don't _do_ that."

"Eavesdropper," Naga muttered. "I bet you _did_ look through the green idiot's mail."

Kakashi's eye drooped in mock sorrow. "Such distrust. Actually, Gai really did ask me to help you -- he leaves on a mission for River Country tomorrow, but he said that if the youth of Konoha were passionate enough about victory to ask for advice, he would see that they got help or he'd run around the village walls one hundred times on his hands. I decided I should spare the gate guards the sight of Gai upside-down."

The three genin contemplated the image of Gai -- green bodysuit, orange legwarmers, shiny hair and all -- walking on his hands around the entire circumference of Konoha.

"Good decision," Naga said after a few seconds.

"I certainly thought so," Kakashi agreed, "but at this point it's up to you three. So... am I your sensei or do I tell Gai to get started?"

The genin exchanged glances, and Iruka turned to Kakashi. "Welcome to the team, Kakashi-sensei."

\---------------

Two weeks later, Yukiko ran through a kata designed for close defensive work and quick, disabling strikes. Kakashi had declared that there was no point teaching her any specialized taijutsu attacks -- her goal was to distract and confuse her opponents with genjutsu and close to strike while they were disabled. If people broke her illusions, she would just have to hope they couldn't or wouldn't finish her from a distance.

"Well, you _could_ try throwing kunai -- actually, if you attached explosive notes that would be a good distraction technique -- but your aim isn't good enough for that to be a reliable attack," Kakashi said when Yukiko protested this hole in her defense. "You think fast under pressure, even if your common sense flies out the window. Trick them into closing."

"How? If they break one genjutsu they'll probably break any new ones I try."

Kakashi shrugged. "That's your problem. Now watch closely -- this block flows into a falling backhand or knife strike to the neck, an excellent set-up for a push and foot-sweep take-down move, or for a knockout blow."

He was probably right, Yukiko mused as she ran through the kata again, counting her breaths and slowly ingraining the motions into her muscle memory. The warm air was heavy with the scent of early summer flowers and greasy pollens, gnats swirled in haphazard clusters under the trees, and the sun beat down from a cloudless sky. Her blue jacket lay abandoned over a tree branch and she'd exchanged her usual pants and shirt for shorts and a sleeveless green t-shirt. She was sweating like a pig anyway.

At least Iruka and Naga were working equally hard. Kakashi had set Naga to learning a rare fire jutsu that ignited with snapped fingers instead of an exhaled breath. He also had her extending her arms, grabbing a tree across the yard, and pulling her body to her hands instead of returning her hands to her body. Her hands were covered in first-degree burns and her body was a mass of scrapes and bruises from dragging over the ground or smashing into trees.

On the second day of this regimen, she showed up with a brilliantly purple and blue splotch over her left eye, a souvenir of the first tree she'd hit the previous day. Neither Yukiko nor Iruka dared to say anything after Naga glared at them. They didn't comment on any phase of the rainbow of sickly colors that paraded across Naga's face, and by now her mottled skin seemed as unremarkable as Iruka's scar.

The training _did_ seem to be working; yesterday morning Naga demonstrated the burning hands on Kakashi, to her teammates' stifled laughter. "An interesting tactic," Kakashi said sourly as he rubbed his burned hip. Then he handed her an instruction book on Go and told her to study strategy for the rest of the day.

Naga was not amused.

As for Iruka, Kakashi was giving him more personal attention, inasmuch as Kakashi could be said to give anything 'attention' in the usual sense of the word. He set Iruka to work through weapons kata, or practice speed-throwing shuriken. Kakashi himself lounged in a nearby tree, reading his little erotic books, napping, mercilessly teasing Iruka, ... and now and then, at unpredictable intervals, ordering Iruka to perform various ninjutsu techniques without letting down his defense or interrupting his target practice.

Iruka lasted four days before he snapped and sent a barrage of kunai at Kakashi.

The jounin vanished in a swirl of leaves, smacked Iruka over the head with his book, and told him to be less obvious in his attacks. "But not bad for a first try," he added. "I was starting to wonder if you were human."

"You... you..."

"The word you want is 'bastard,'" Naga said helpfully, limping past after her latest collision with a tree.

Iruka drew a deep breath. "Thank you, Naga. Kakashi-sensei... you _bastard!_ What's the point of driving me insane?"

Kakashi straightened from his habitual slouch and looked oddly serious. "A shinobi has no use for courtesy and consideration during battle or on missions. Only two things matter: achieving the objective and protecting your team. You can't afford to remember your enemies' humanity. They won't be thinking about yours, and if you hesitate, you'll die.

"The chuunin exam isn't exactly like that, but it isn't like your classrooms either. It's a replacement for war."

"I know that," Iruka said. "I still don't see why you keep insulting me."

Kakashi's eye twinkled and he leaned back against his tree. "When you figure that out, the lesson will be complete. Now pick up your knives and aim at the target, not me."

Fuming, Iruka returned to his practice.

Kakashi, Yukiko decided now as she drifted in the clear yet distant concentration of her kata, wasn't half bad as an instructor, once you saw past his peculiar attitude and strange techniques. The team was learning, and he'd succeeded in uniting them in their quest for revenge -- that wasn't a tactic that would work for a regular jounin-sensei and genin team, but since he wasn't going to lead them on missions, he probably didn't care if they disliked him.

He might regret that after the next week. The team had enlisted Naruto's help in setting up practical jokes and not even the most alert jounin could avoid all of them. Kakashi, with his face stuck in his book, had even less chance of escaping unscathed.

Yukiko grinned and started her kata again.

\---------------

The morning of the third test dawned bright and clear, though an indefinable tension thrummed in the air. It felt almost like the faint electric charge preceding a thunderstorm, but in this case it was caused by hundreds upon hundreds of excited chakra signatures. Yukiko wondered if huge public events irritated all ninja as much as they irritated her, or if she was just hypersensitive from too much genjutsu practice and chakra-sensing exercises.

Probably hypersensitive, she decided, since none of her ninja tenants seemed anything other than innocently excited as they walked past her office.

There was no real point in trying to get paperwork done -- she might have been better advised to sleep in or spend an hour or two on last-minute practice -- but the routine of paying bills, adjusting her weekly newspaper ad to account for a newly empty 2-bedroom, checking through the tenant complaint forms in her drop-box, and calling the glazier to replace a cracked window in 5-D, was soothing. This was something Yukiko _knew_ she could do, and do well. This was something she'd still have even if she crashed and burned a few hours from now. This was -- surprisingly -- something she didn't want to give up even if she passed the chuunin exam and could be a regular ninja again.

She looked up at the knock on her door, startled; she hadn't heard the tiles squeak.

"Who's there?" she asked cautiously.

Someone giggled. Yukiko frowned; that sounded awfully familiar. "Kid, is that you?"

"Yeah!" Naruto rushed into her office in a blur of orange, and danced around her chair. "Hey, hey, Yukiko-san! I found your squeaky tiles! I can sneak up on you now!" He paused and stared suspiciously at her paper-covered desk. "Hey, hey, why are you working? Don't you have your test today?"

Yukiko grinned at the kid, her tension draining away. "Yes, but it doesn't start for a couple hours yet -- all they're doing now is seating the audience and letting the Kage and Masters make speeches about international peace and cooperation. Who wants to sit through that?" She picked up a sheaf of maintenance requests and tapped the kid on the nose; he scrunched up his face and frowned through narrowed blue eyes. "And don't think I can't spot you even if you did find my squeaky tiles -- you have a lot to learn before you can sneak up on me."

Naruto stood straighter -- not that this meant much, given his short stature -- and clenched his fist in determination. "Someday I'm gonna sneak up on you, Yukiko-san. Next year I'm gonna be in the ninja academy and Iruka-san will help me. He's good at sneaking around!"

"True," Yukiko agreed, "but I'm better. Now shoo, kid. Go plan another trick on Kakashi-san."

Naruto's face crinkled in a grin. "Hehehe -- his hair was still pink yesterday! Next time I want to get his stupid books!" He dashed out of the office, leaving Yukiko to contemplate Kakashi's response to the desecration of his precious erotic literature. The jounin hadn't seemed too upset over the dye Naruto had dumped into his silver hair while the three genin pinned him down, but she didn't think he'd be so complacent if his books were threatened; he'd already acted jumpy when Naga wanted to borrow them for late night reading... although, to be fair, Kakashi might simply have been worried about Iruka's reaction to that.

Well, it really wasn't her concern. After today, Kakashi would have no reason to be near Yukiko's building, and unless he applied to be a real jounin-sensei, he and Naruto probably wouldn't meet again for a decade, by which point he might well be dead anyway.

After today, she probably wouldn't see Iruka and Naga much either -- if even one of them passed the chuunin exam, their little mismatched team would break up. Even if they all failed they'd have to wait half a year for the next exam, and they wouldn't have normal genin missions to keep them together until then. A strange, hollow weight coalesced in the pit of Yukiko's stomach at that thought.

She buried herself in paperwork as a distraction.

\---------------

Two hours later Yukiko stood at her apartment door and gave her outfit and equipment one last review. Pants taped to her ankles, check. Wire, rope, explosive notes, and a few grenades -- both smoke and flash -- in her jacket pockets, check. Kunai holster filled and strapped to her thigh, check. Hair pulled back from her face, check. Forehead protector, check.

Self-confidence? Yukiko ran over the information on Kakashi's papers. She thought she had at least an even chance of beating the three Grass-nin and two of the Mist-nin. The third Mist-nin and Aburame Kuroko had some defenses against genjutsu, but at worst she should manage not to lose disgracefully. She already knew from the second test that Hyuuga Shiro was vulnerable to illusions. So long as she didn't have to fight Uchiha Akaro, she should be okay.

Self-confidence, tentative check.

There was only one thing left. She hurried up the back stairs to Naruto's apartment and knocked on his door. "Kid? If you're in there, the third test starts in half an hour. I can get you into the family seats if you want to watch."

The door slammed open, revealing a stunned Naruto. "Really? _Family_ seats?"

There was something about the way he emphasized that one word... oh. Oh, shit. Now what?

"Yes. Family seats." Yukiko shifted her feet, uncomfortable under the kid's measuring, narrow-eyed stare. He seemed like he expected her to take back the implication, to push him away. She wasn't certain how to reassure him. "I'd rather have you than my uncle, or even my cousins."

"That's just 'cause they're not ninja," Naruto said, looking unconvinced.

Well, it was true that civilians didn't really appreciate the skill involved in tournament fights, but that wasn't the real reason she'd prefer having the kid there as her family. Yukiko jammed her hands into her pockets, fingering her tools for reassurance. "Look, kid... Naruto... I'd want you there even if you didn't want to be a ninja. You know how a team can be like a family, even though they're not related by blood?"

He nodded warily.

"Well, my old team was like that. And now you're like that for me," Yukiko said quickly, rushing to get the words out. She looked down, not wanting to see Naruto's face if he still didn't believe her.

Several seconds passed in silence, and then a small body hurtled forward and wrapped its arms around her waist. "I've never had a family," Naruto whispered.

Yukiko found her arms creeping around his shoulders, and she squeezed him gently. "Now you do." Somehow it was easier to say this time.

"So, so, you're like my big sister, Yukiko-san?"

Huh. Yukiko turned it over in her head, testing the concept. Big sister. She liked it. "Yeah, kid, I'll be your big sister if you want."

"Yeah!" Naruto let go and cocked his head, face scrunched up in thought. "Yukiko-neesan. Yukiko- _neechan_." He grinned suddenly, lighting up like sunlight bursting through clouds. "Hey, hey, Yukiko-neechan, let's go! You don't want to be late for the test. And I want to watch you kick people's butts!"

A small orange whirlwind latched onto Yukiko's hand and dragged her down the stairs. She couldn't stop a smile from spreading over her face as Naruto danced and tugged her through the streets of Konoha. The kid wanted to be part of her family. He wanted to be her little brother.

Self-confidence, check. Today, Yukiko could take on the world.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter the Eleventh, in which Yukiko plots a grand renovation project, we meet Naga's mother, Asuma makes an uncredited cameo, and the third test starts with an uneven matchup.

The great arena was set near the village wall, on the opposite side of Konoha from Yukiko's building. It served three purposes: it held the full population of Konoha during important events such as the investment of a new Hokage; it provided a venue for official tournaments, both internal and international; and it became an ice-rink during the winter. Today it was fulfilling the second purpose.

Naruto slowed as he and Yukiko approached the arena walls, unsure of where to go. Yukiko firmed her grip on his hand and knocked on the side door that led to the contestants' area -- small bathrooms, two changing rooms, a first aid station, and a walled-off section of the lowest balcony ring, chosen so they could easily observe the other fights and reach the main floor for their own tests. Several rows of seats were reserved for the family and teammates of the participants.

A masked and robed Anbu guard opened the door and drew her shoulders into a disapproving posture. "Ayakawa Yukiko?"

Yukiko nodded.

"You're almost late," the Anbu said. She pointed at Naruto. "And what is _that_ doing here?"

Naruto inched closer to Yukiko, his hand alternately clenching and loosening in her grip as if he couldn't decide whether to cling or run. Yukiko glared at the Anbu. " _He_ is here as my family."

"You'd claim that as your blood?"

"Not blood, but family. There are no competing claims -- I have the legal right to adopt him. Even if I didn't," Yukiko said, hardening her glare, "I can still give family and team seats to whomever I want. Now let us through before I really am late."

The Anbu shrugged, but she stepped aside and closed the door behind Yukiko and Naruto. "Go up the stairs on the left, and hurry. They're nearly ready to assign numbers and determine the first match fights."

Yukiko led Naruto through the dim corridors, wondering for the thousandth time why nobody had ever bothered to paint the featureless concrete walls, or tile the stone floors in anything other than utilitarian squares. For a land as known for its flamboyant architecture as Fire Country, and for a people as patriotic as Leaf-nin, it was astonishing that nobody seemed to mind making such a drab impression on visiting ninja.

Hmm. Perhaps the next time she met with Sarutobi-sama to discuss Naruto's progress, she could mention sprucing up the arena. Some of her maintenance contractors did carving, painting, and fine carpentry on the side; she could probably work out a few feasible renovation plans with them and make a decent profit as the middleman and shinobi contact.

But not today, she reminded herself as she reached the balcony door and pushed it open; bright midday sun spilled into the stairwell and Yukiko automatically tugged Naruto into the shadows so they'd make less inviting targets. Tomorrow she could think about business. Tomorrow she'd be an apartment manager again.

Today, though... today she was a ninja.

Yukiko took a deep breath and stepped into the arena.

\---------------

The twelve genin competing in the third test stood in a group near the balcony walls. The jounin sensei stood nearby: one gray-shrouded Mist-nin, tall and stiff with folded arms; one petite Grass-nin with a diaphanous veil and claw-tipped gloves; a broad, bored-looking Leaf-nin smoking a cigarette; and Kakashi, who had a knack for insinuating himself into situations so smoothly that nobody thought to question his presence. Two Anbu lounged in deceptive relaxation at either end of the small balcony section, and a stocky, red-haired Leaf-nin wearing his forehead protector as a belt was fiddling with the control box for the announcement boards, obviously getting ready to draw lots for fight order.

The Mist-nin and Grass-nin had no family present -- even after a decade of peace, the hidden villages weren't relaxed enough to welcome more foreign ninja than absolutely necessary, and civilians generally didn't travel for ninja events -- but several Leaf-nin and civilian relatives sat behind the genin. Yukiko spotted a thin, pale woman who, aside from her formal kimono, long hair, and lack of a forehead protector, could be Naga in twenty years; she had the same angular, fine-boned face and startling gold eyes. Clusters of Hyuuga, Uchiha, and Aburame rounded out the private audience, each clan group keeping carefully to themselves.

Although both Aburame Kuroko and Uchiha Akaro seemed to have relatives about Naruto's age, Yukiko steered him toward Naga's look-alike. The old ninja clans had lost the most in the Kyuubi's attack, and they tended to look down on outsiders anyway. While they would be controlled in their dislike -- ninja couldn't afford hysterical hatred -- Yukiko figured Naruto had a better chance of getting neutral attention elsewhere.

"Hello," she said, bowing slightly when she reached the pale woman in the lavender kimono. "I'm Ayakawa Yukiko, one of Naga's partners, and this is Uzumaki Naruto, my brother. It's been an honor to work with Naga during this exam."

The pale woman offered a tiny smile and bowed her head in return. "Thank you for your kind words. I am Tonoike Taizen; Naga is my daughter. I am pleased to meet you, Yukiko-san." She cast a sideways glance at Naruto, and relaxed slightly at the way his grip on Yukiko's hand belied his defiant expression. "You also, Naruto-kun."

Naruto looked doubtful.

"Go on, kid, you can sit with Taizen-san," Yukiko said. "She can explain what's happening if you get confused." She looked at Taizen for confirmation, and received a tiny nod.

"I'm not confused," Naruto protested, but he perched on a seat near Taizen, not quite relaxed but not longer looking as though he might bolt or start a fight at the slightest provocation. "Don't worry about me, Yukiko-neechan -- you're gonna be late, remember?"

Yukiko reflexively looked at the rest of the genin, several of whom were staring impatiently at her. "Ah, right. I'll talk to you later, kid. Thank you, Taizen-san."

"I'm certain he'll be much less trouble than Naga was at his age," Taizen said with her tiny smile. "Good luck, Yukiko-san."

"Yeah, good luck Yukiko-neechan!"

Yukiko nodded a hasty thanks and vaulted down over the seats to the balcony floor. Iruka waved her over, and she slipped into the circle of genin, standing between him and Naga.

The red-haired ninja at the control box to the electronic announcement boards did a quick head-count, tapped three keys, and closed the programming panel, leaving only the basic keypad exposed. "Hmm," he said, "a bit late, but better late than never. Okay, now that you're all here, I'll run over the rules one last time.

"I'm Okame Hisen, the referee, and this is a standard elimination tournament -- lose one fight and you're out. In the third round one of you will get a bye since, barring any mutual defeats, there'll be three of you left. I'll decide who sits out, with advice from the Kage and Masters. Don't bother contesting my decision; it's final. The Kage and Masters will watch for characteristics that are valuable in chuunin, and will promote you or hold you back on that basis. Winning fights won't necessarily help you pass. Remember, at this point any of you can become chuunin even if you lose your first fight, so long as you show what the Kage and Masters are looking for. Any questions?"

One of the Grass-nin, a green-haired boy Yukiko remembered from the first test, pulled his hand from one of his numerous coat pockets and waved it lazily. "Yeah. So, what about killing techniques?"

Hisen shrugged. "It's an elimination tournament -- anything goes. Just try not to bring the arena down on us or injure the audience. That won't make anyone happy and it really won't impress anyone with your control."

The boy nodded and slipped his hand into a different pocket. "That's cool."

"Okay then. The first match is..."

Hisen pushed a button on the keypad, and boards around the arena flashed into life, two names appearing in glowing yellow.

"...Uchiha Akaro vs. Ayakawa Yukiko!"

Yukiko's stomach dropped to her feet. Oh, _shit_.

\---------------

Iruka and Naga shifted closer; Iruka ready to catch her and Naga glaring daggers at Akaro. The black-haired boy smirked at Yukiko from across the circle. "I hope you know more than genjutsu or this is going to be really boring," he said.

Naga hissed at him.

"Save it for your own fight, snake-freak," Akaro said, and vaulted lightly over the balcony wall to the main floor. He strolled to the center of the arena and folded his arms over his high-collared red shirt. Every inch of his body screamed arrogant impatience.

"Shit," Yukiko muttered. "Oh, shit."

Iruka rested his hand on her elbow. "Are you all right, Yukiko? I know this is the worst match-up for you, but you can get through this. Akaro isn't as strong or as smart as he thinks he is, and we have faith in you -- right, Naga?"

Naga nodded, still glaring over the balcony wall at Akaro. "Damn right. Kick his ass, Yukiko."

"But he has the Sharingan!"

Naga snorted. "So? He's just a little prick. Doesn't even have the full Sharingan -- only two of the little swirly things in each eye, not three. You beat that assassin in the second test. You slipped genjutsu past Kakashi in the first test. Akaro's no problem."

"Well, I wouldn't say he's _no_ problem," Iruka said, patting Yukiko on the back, "but he's certainly not as invincible as you think he is. Go on, get down there before Hisen-san calls an automatic forfeit."

"Maybe I _should_ forfeit," Yukiko muttered. "I might as well put myself out of my misery fast." Nightmare images of her last chuunin exam, and her humiliation at the hands of an Uchiha, flashed through her mind.

Iruka grabbed her arm and twisted her slightly so she could see the family seats from the corner of her eye. "Naruto is watching you," he whispered into her ear. "Are you going to mock his dream by giving up here?"

The kid was beaming at her, waving his arms in encouragement and bouncing on his seat with excitement. Taizen smiled indulgently and produced a small blue-green flag out of nowhere for him to wave.

...It would break his heart if she quit now. And it wouldn't be fair to Iruka and Naga either, or Kakashi, after they'd helped her this far. It wouldn't be fair to her parents, who'd always supported her dream. It wouldn't be fair to Ame and Kasumi, who'd never stopped reminding her that she had a place waiting on their team once she made chuunin.

It wouldn't be fair to _herself_ , to quit without ever knowing how far she could go. She'd told Uncle Yutaro she wanted to prove that she'd given up being a shinobi because she wanted to, not because she wasn't good enough to make it.

Besides, Yukiko told herself, determination building, Uchiha Akaro was only thirteen. He'd grown up in peace. He didn't know what real fighting was. He didn't know how to pull himself together and keep going after his whole world fell apart. Even if he did have the Sharingan, there was no way he knew how to use it to its fullest, knew its strengths and weaknesses inside and out. And she'd learned some new tricks since her last chuunin exam.

Maybe she couldn't beat him. But she could go down into that arena and give him the fight of his life.

"Okay, Naga," she said, a tiny smile breaking out through her nerves. "I'll kick his ass."

Yukiko held Naga's cockeyed smile and Naruto's trusting eyes in her mind as she descended into the arena. But, being neither stupid nor desperate to feed an oversized ego, she took the stairs down instead of jumping.

\---------------

As she walked slowly to the center of the arena, Yukiko kept her face blank even while her thoughts raced. She couldn't trick Akaro's eyes; he'd see through any of her illusions. She couldn't counter his ninjutsu; she didn't have any attacks of her own. She couldn't outrun him; the Uchiha were notoriously fast. She couldn't outlast him; he had youth on his side, and had been practicing much more regularly than she had.

She had to outthink him.

Well. People said the Uchiha were geniuses, but not all of them could be. And just because the Sharingan could _see_ through genjutsu, that didn't necessarily mean it would help if she tried to fool Akaro's _other_ senses. She'd just have to set up a useless jutsu as a distraction so he'd think her chakra was feeding _that_ instead of a whisper in his mind or something to make him stumble over thin air.

Yukiko ran through a list of basic genjutsu forms, tossing out the visual ones and trying to find something useful. Unfortunately, most genjutsu was designed to fool the eyes, since vision was the most acute sense -- and jutsu that affected the other senses usually had a visual component attached that would, in this case, render the whole exercise pointless. If Akaro spotted the visual part of an illusion, he'd know to discount the other pieces.

She'd have to improvise, have to pick bits and pieces from various jutsu and weave them together into new forms. Yukiko scowled in her mind. Creating new genjutsu on the fly was easier and safer than mucking around with ninjutsu -- she could set the stage with basic seals and then do any fine-tuning with her mind. It wasted chakra that more accurate seals would save, but at least half of genjutsu was mentally controlled anyway. Unfortunately, there was still no guarantee any new techniques would work the way she intended.

Still, they ought to distract Akaro for a second or two, which might be all she needed. If she could get him to close, and then throw him off balance for just a second, she might be able to win. _If_.

Hisen looked between Akaro's casual smirk and Yukiko's blank determination, and raised his arm. "The match will end when one person surrenders or is unable to continue fighting. If I judge that one of you is finished but the other doesn't stop attacking, I'll break you up. Clear?"

Yukiko and Akaro nodded.

"Good. Begin!" Hisen lowered his arm and leapt out of the way.

Yukiko immediately wove a quick area genjutsu, causing illusory trees to spring up throughout the arena. Akaro laughed. "What's the point? I can see through this, idiot."

Of course he could, Yukiko thought, but the trees were just a cover. The important part was the wall of silence that shut out any noise from the audience and left him receptive to her whispers. She knew what he saw: a short, thin woman, blue-green hair pulled into a sloppy ponytail, and badly hidden fear on her face. Nothing threatening. Nothing to worry about. All she had to do was enhance that impression. _What a stupid woman,_ she murmured into Akaro's mind, letting the words coalesce out of the diffuse chakra forming the illusory forest. _I don't even need to use jutsu to beat her. Pathetic._

"You know, I don't even need ninjutsu to beat you," Akaro said, drawing a handful of shuriken. "You should be ashamed of yourself, trying to be a chuunin with such pathetic skills."

He flicked the shuriken toward Yukiko, who threw herself low and to the left, cursing as one tore through her pants and grazed her leg. Don't get cocky, she told herself. Just because he's listening to you doesn't mean he's going to forget basic strategy. Her leg stung where the shuriken had drawn blood.

Akaro smirked and threw another shuriken, his arm and hand moving too fast for Yukiko to see clearly. She dodged left again, twisting sideways, and felt the wind as the sharp metal flew past only inches from her back. Damnit, this wasn't going to work; sooner or later he was going to hit something important.

She had to distract him.

Shuriken -- duck. Yukiko slipped her hand into her pocket and pulled out a wire coil and a flash bomb. Shuriken -- dodge left -- remember to pretend the tree is solid! She drew a kunai and wrapped the wire through the hilt loop. Shuriken -- dodge left, ignore the sting along her right shoulder. She slid the short end through the pull-tab of the bomb, and wrapped it three times around the main body. Shuriken -- dodge left. Shuriken -- jump, dodge left.

Shuriken -- duck. She slammed the kunai into the ground as she rolled away from another shuriken. Dodge left -- duck -- dodge left -- just a flesh wound, don't slow down! -- left, left, left -- jump -- grimace and clap a hand to her left side, pulling the shuriken free -- left, left -- around the fake tree, always pretending it's real -- left, left... how many shuriken did Akaro _have?_ Breathe heavily, stumble, and keep her hand pressed to her side. Dodge left, and again, and again...

180 degrees. Now!

Yukiko yanked on the wire, pulling the tab loose from the flash bomb, and sent it flying straight toward Akaro.

She closed her eyes against the burst of light, then took careful aim and hurled a handful of shuriken at Akaro's legs, hoping to slice tendon or cut deep into muscle.

He dodged. Yukiko grimaced; it had been worth a try.

"Nice try, but I'm not stupid," Akaro said, smirking. He pointed at his red-and-black eyes. "I can see what you're doing, remember? I saw your wire."

Yes, but he wasn't throwing shuriken at her anymore, now was he? _Definitely pathetic,_ Yukiko projected. _She's bleeding, she's tired. She's not thinking straight -- she kept acting like the fake trees were real. I bet if I pushed her next to one, she wouldn't even try to step through it._

Akaro sauntered forward, grinning and twirling a kunai in his right hand. Yukiko drew three kunai of her own with her right hand, keeping her left pressed against her side. She slid back one step, two steps, until her back would almost have pressed against bark if her trees were real. She tensed, ready to dodge sideways.

Akaro blurred forward, aiming just a bit to her right...

Yukiko dropped to the ground, falling straight back into the heart of the tree and sticking her leg out to trip Akaro. He stumbled, touched down with his left foot, and pushed into an aerial flip, hurling his kunai as he twisted away from her scattershot knives.

Shit! Yukiko frantically rolled sideways, scrambled to her feet, and drew another kunai.

Akaro looked at her speculatively.

Shit, shit, shit. If he started thinking he'd underestimated her, she was in big trouble. _Not a bad trick, but that's all she has,_ Yukiko whispered hastily, swaying on her feet. _Still, maybe I should finish this before she gets another 'clever' idea._

"That was almost smart, faking _two_ patterns of movement," Akaro said. "But I think this has gone on long enough. Do you surrender?"

"No." Interesting that he'd make the offer, though, Yukiko thought. Maybe he wasn't quite as much of a self-centered little jerk as Naga thought.

Akaro shrugged. "Your loss. This ends now."

Oh, _shit_. Time to go for broke. Akaro blurred forward again, and Yukiko released the trees, released the silence, jerked her hands into a tiger seal, and forced all her chakra and will into a scream and flash of light within his mind.

" _NO!_ "

The thunder echoed back in her own mind, and she staggered, spots of phantom light flashing before her eyes. Shit. This was why she _hated_ improvising in the middle of a fight; that scream was a physical effect genjutsu, just like Vertigo, and those always doubled back on the caster. She had to find Akaro _now_ , before she lost the few seconds' advantage she'd gained by bracing for the chakra drain.

Something scrabbled against the dirt to her left; Akaro, eyes squeezed to narrow slits, one hand clamped to his right ear, struggled to his feet and fumbled for a kunai. "You... sneak... cheat..." he mumbled, the words sticking to his bloody tongue and lip.

Yukiko winced in sympathy as he swayed, but she threw her kunai anyway, aiming for his left shoulder. His eyes tracked it automatically, his mind in no shape to override millennia of animal instincts, and Yukiko reached his right side before he could readjust to block her.

Her knife-hand missed his neck and slammed into his shoulder. Shit. The feedback was throwing her off more than she could afford, and her balance was off; she was overcompensating for the slice below her left ribs.

The crowd roared as Akaro dodged her attempted foot sweep -- she couldn't tell if they were cheering for him or for her. It didn't matter, really, so long as she didn't let the noise throw her concentration.

"Missed," Akaro panted. Blood trickled from his mouth, where he'd bitten into his tongue when the genjutsu hit. "My turn." He sliced at Yukiko's stomach with his kunai; she knocked his arm aside, and he turned his stumble into a shoulder roll.

"Katon: Mythical Fireflower no Jutsu!"

The gout of flame was weak, but well targeted. Yukiko blinked, then threw herself to the ground, feeling fire scorch her hair and back as it passed over her. Akaro was recovering, enough to use ninjutsu. She had to finish this _now_.

There was something Kakashi said, several weeks ago, about explosive notes and kunai. A good distraction technique...? No time for that, but fortunately she had other tools.

Yukiko pulled two smoke bombs from her jacket pocket, pulled the tabs, and hurled them in Akaro's general direction. He dodged easily despite his still-shaky balance -- and sank another shuriken into her left thigh -- but that didn't matter. She only needed three seconds worth of distraction, and the thick, eye-watering, mouth-burning smoke that poured from the bombs covered everything within five yards. Two bombs was probably overkill, but at this point, she didn't care.

Yukiko concentrated her chakra and will, formed her seals with care, and walked into the thinning cloud of smoke. Left foot, right foot, then left again, each step slow and deliberate, each foot placed with exacting care. This was her last chance; she couldn't let it go to waste.

"Do you surrender?" she asked.

Akaro coughed, then wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. He glared. "Never. You?"

Yukiko smiled, a little shakily, and shifted to protect her left side. "Come and get me." She dropped her left elbow slightly. Take the bait, take the bait... she couldn't whisper in his mind anymore -- didn't have any illusions up to mask the flow of chakra, but she could still play a role, act a part. Come on, take the bait...

She set her hands and waited. One. Two. Akaro's eyes narrowed, flashed red-and-black, and whirled. Yukiko didn't let her grin out; that wasn't going to do any good now, but let him ease his suspicion. Let him take the bait... Three. Four. Five.

Akaro rushed forward, aiming for her wounded side...

And ran, instead, straight into Yukiko's knife hand. She stabbed him in the throat, swept his feet to the side, and followed him to the ground, her knee planted on his chest and a kunai resting against his throat. "Surrender."

He didn't answer. Yukiko took a deep breath, trying to steady herself. His eyes looked odd -- actually, he didn't seem to be focusing on anything. She waved her hand in front of his face. No reaction.

"Concussion?" she wondered.

"Hmm. Yes, probably. That was a hard fall," someone said next to her.

Yukiko turned, too tired to flinch. Hisen, the red-haired judge, squatted down beside her and checked Akaro's pulse. "Well, he isn't dead; that's nice. A good fight, both of you. Would you mind telling me just what happened at the end, and why that scream threw both of you off so badly?"

Normally she would have argued -- no ninja liked giving away her secrets -- but she was too tired, and besides, it might help her pass the exam. "They're physical effect genjutsu," Yukiko said. "The scream is amplified in the mind, along with a flash of light. I don't have a name for it. The second one I call Sidestep; it throws your feet off ten degrees to one side. I was expecting it and aimed to compensate. Akaro didn't."

"Hmm. Risky, but interesting. I'll tell the Kage and Masters. For now..." Hisen whipped a small box out of his pocket and pressed several buttons. "There we go.

"You win."


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter the Twelfth, in which Iruka has fun with mirrors, Naga takes shameless advantage of her role as the team's bratty little sister, Yukiko discovers the perils of celebrity, Naruto learns some new words, and a certain pair of brothers get cameos. Also, an omake!

The arena was oddly quiet as Yukiko trudged back to the stairs. She supposed nobody had really expected her to win, not a genjutsu expert against an Uchiha, even if she did have nearly a decade of experience on Akaro.

Iruka and Naga met her at the ground door, beaming. Naga slipped her shoulder under Yukiko's arm, and Iruka frowned at the shuriken still stuck in her left thigh. "I'll go find one of the medic-nin on duty," he said. "Congratulations, Yukiko!"

Naga waved him off and helped Yukiko up the stairs. "Told you, you could kick his ass. And you did." She grinned. "I bet it felt good."

"Well, yes," Yukiko admitted. "I hope Akaro's all right, though."

"Who cares!"

Yukiko frowned. "He's a Leaf-nin -- we should all care, even if we don't personally like him. Besides, I don't think he's quite as bad as you remember. He _did_ ask me to surrender before he tried to finish the fight."

"He always does that," Naga said, twitching her shoulder. "Likes to rub it in that he's better than everyone else."

Or maybe he didn't want to take meaningless fights to their logical conclusion, Yukiko thought, and taunted people to cover his insecurity. There was no shame in that. But Naga could be right -- he might just be a little jerk -- so she kept her thoughts to herself and concentrated on climbing the stairs.

Naruto was waiting at the top, bouncing on his toes and switching between smiles and wide-eyed worry. "Hey, hey, Yukiko-neechan! Are you okay? You were so cool! I knew you'd kick his butt! Do you need a band-aid? Hey, hey, you should sit down. Are you gonna be okay for your next fight? I bet you kick people's butts again!"

Yukiko sank onto a bench across the aisle from Taizen and patted the space beside her. "Kid, sit down -- you're making me dizzy."

Naruto promptly dropped onto the seat, but he couldn't stop his feet from fidgeting. "Are you sure you're okay, Yukiko-neechan?"

"Yes, I'll be fine. I just need some bandages and a bit of rest, that's all. Now shush -- they're going to announce the next fight."

Hisen finished loading Akaro's body onto a stretcher carried by two medic-nin, and vaulted back onto the balcony. He fiddled briefly with the keypad, programming the results of the first match, and then two new names flashed on the boards.

"Hino Suisen vs. Umino Iruka!"

\---------------

According to Kakashi's profiles, Hino Suisen was a Grass-nin, one year older than Naga, who fought using a family jutsu that focused light. She could blind a person unwary enough to stare directly at her mirrors.

She could probably leave the mirrors home and just blind most men with her outfit, Yukiko thought sourly as she watched the girl glide into the center of the arena. Her gold shirt barely skimmed the tops of her breasts, and stopped well above her navel -- only the full sleeves gave it any claim on being a shirt instead of a bra with ambitions. Her white pants were equally tight, and slung low on her hips. Mirrors flashed on her wrists and ankles and jewelry glittered in her ears, around her neck, and in her navel.

Suisen had taken the role of seductive kunoichi and run with it. Iruka was going to throw a _fit_... if he didn't pass out first.

"Here, Yukiko, I brought a medic. Who's up next?"

Well, speak his name and he appeared. "You, apparently," Yukiko said as she stuck her leg into the aisle for the medic-nin to inspect. "You're fighting Hino Suisen, the mirror girl -- she's already down in the arena. Brace yourself."

Iruka shot her a puzzled look. "Brace myself? Why should I..." He trailed off as he got his first clear look at Suisen's fighting outfit. "Kami, what is she _wearing?_ "

Naga snickered from behind Yukiko. "Clothes, Iruka-chan. They're called clothes."

Yukiko leaned back and whapped Naga with her uninjured arm. "Shush. Go on, Iruka, before they disqualify you."

"...Right." Iruka swallowed, checked his kodachi, and vaulted over the railing.

"Show-off," Yukiko muttered, and then winced as the medic-nin pulled the shuriken out of her thigh. Naga snickered, undeterred by Yukiko's glare. "Oh, shut up."

\---------------

Hisen dropped his arm and Suisen leaped backwards; light gathered in blinding glows at her wrists and ankles and on her forehead-protector. "You can't fight what you can't see!" she called.

Iruka drew one kodachi with his left hand and a handful of shuriken with his right. "I'll think of something." He squinted and threw the shuriken toward her. Suisen laughed and vaulted over them; her long blonde pigtails whipped through the air behind her.

"Go Iruka-san! Kick her butt!" Naruto cheered. Then he turned to Yukiko, looking slightly confused. "Hey, hey, Yukiko-neechan, what's wrong with what that girl's wearing? It's just clothes, right?"

Yukiko winced. Great. Just great. It wasn't enough that she was wounded. It wasn't enough that she was in the middle of the chuunin exam. It wasn't enough that Suisen had just sent a storm of glittering shuriken towards Iruka, who was furiously parrying with his kodachi.

No, she had to explain sex and body taboos to the kid.

"Help me," she muttered to Naga.

Naga just smiled that infuriating cockeyed smile. "He's _your_ little brother, not mine. Besides, you know Iruka doesn't like me talking about this stuff."

Yukiko vowed to get revenge after the fights were over and turned back to Naruto, catching a flash of light that left brilliant spots floating in her vision. "Um, nothing's _wrong_ with her clothes. But... you don't usually run around naked, right?"

"Ick!" Naruto stuck out his tongue and crossed his eyes. "No way!"

"So naked people are kind of unusual. Well, for women and girls, there are certain parts of the body we usually keep covered. So if they're uncovered, or look like they _might_ be uncovered, it can be a little distracting, especially for men."

A look of intense concentration spread across Naruto's face. "So, so... naked girls make boys get all funny, like Iruka-san?"

"...More or less. Now shush, kid; I want to watch Iruka's fight."

Suisen was dancing circles around Iruka, who couldn't risk looking toward her for more than a second at a time -- any longer and she could aim her light into his eyes and blind him. It looked hopeless, but there was something suspicious about the pattern of his retreats and the way he still hadn't drawn his second kodachi. His right hand hovered over his shuriken holster.

"What's he waiting for?" Naga asked. "He's fast enough to hit her if he closes. That light-show won't block a sword."

A beam of light seared out from Suisen's wrist and burned across Iruka's shoulder; fabric sparked and smoldered in its wake.

"I guess that's why he isn't closing," Yukiko said. That looked painful -- at least fire jutsu were somewhat diffuse, but this light was nearly solid, and, judging by the way Suisen had shifted her wrist to track Iruka through his dodge, she could hold the beam on one target for several seconds. Yukiko didn't blame Iruka for not wanting to get closer to that sort of attack.

But if he wasn't closing, what _was_ he doing?

Yukiko studied the arena and watched Suisen's pattern of strikes. The Grass-nin depended on mobility; she used her leaps and acrobatics to cover a wide territory so Iruka could never be sure what direction was safe to look in. Despite that, Iruka was covering himself well -- so far none of Suisen's shuriken had done more than graze him, and he only had three burns that Yukiko could see.

...And he was luring Suisen toward the shadows under the arena wall. Huh. Yukiko leaned back toward Naga. "He's trying to get her into the shadows."

Naga twitched her shoulder. "Think she'll fall for it?"

"Probably not."

"Think he'll win?"

Yukiko shrugged. "Not with that plan."

"Hey, hey, don't say that!" Naruto yelled, jumping onto the bench and frowning at Yukiko and Naga. "Iruka-san's gonna kick her butt! He's gonna be my sensei next year!"

Yukiko sighed, but, remembering what happened the last time she tried to make Naruto realize that not all dreams could come true, she didn't argue. "Okay, kid, I'll be good. I want Iruka to win too."

"Good," Naruto said. "Now you have to cheer for Iruka-san, Yukiko-neechan, 'cause you said bad things about him. It's like an apple-jee."

"That's 'apology,' kid." Yukiko sighed. "Do I really have to cheer?"

"Yeah." Naruto folded his arms and attempted a stern look.

This was embarrassing. Yukiko glanced around to see if any of the other genin and spectators were looking in her direction. Almost everyone seemed focused on the arena, but a boy about Naruto's age, with the Uchiha fan on his shirt, caught her eyes and stared curiously at her. Yukiko scowled at him, hoping he would turn away, but he set his chin and scowled back at her.

Naruto poked her. "Come on, Yukiko-neechan."

Yukiko reluctantly waved her arms. "Go Iruka. You can do it. Yeah." The Uchiha boy laughed merrily and scooted closer to his family. Naruto poked her again, harder this time, and Yukiko turned back to him.

"That was a really stinky cheer, Yukiko-neechan," Naruto said with a pout.

"The brat has a point," Naga added.

Yukiko could _hear_ the smirk in her voice, and was trying to think of a good response when a strangely melodic crash drew her attention back to the arena. Iruka was standing deep in the shadows on the far right of the arena, one kodachi in his left hand and his right finally going back to draw his second sword. Suisen stood in the sunlight, shards of glass scattered at her feet, and screamed. "You jerk! You broke my mirrors! Do you know how much those _cost?_ I'm going to _kill_ you!"

Iruka only shrugged. "I told you I'd think of something." He ran forward, and now it was Suisen's turn to retreat, leaping and flipping like a demented grasshopper, always just a second too slow to pull herself together and attempt any sort of attack.

"Did you see what he did?" Yukiko asked Naga.

She nodded. "In the sun everything's bright -- can't track her attacks. But in the shadow, the light made paths. He could see where she was every time she tried to hit him, and he nailed her mirrors with shuriken."

Huh. "I guess he did have a plan."

"See? See? I told you Iruka-san was gonna kick her butt!" Naruto said as he bounced in his seat. "Go Iruka-san!"

Down in the arena, Iruka pinned Suisen to the ground with a sword at her throat, and Hisen declared the match over.

\---------------

Naruto lunged at Iruka as he reached the top of the stairs, babbling about how cool the fight was, how he _knew_ Iruka was gonna win, and how he made Yukiko-neechan cheer even though she didn't do it right. Iruka smiled and trudged over to his teammates, favoring his burned right leg.

"I'd call the medic-nin back, but I'm too tired to stand up," Yukiko said from where she'd sprawled sideways in her seat and laid her injured leg flat on the bench. "Congratulations!"

"Thanks." Iruka sat down beside Naga, who slid inward from the aisle to make room for him.

"I'll find a doctor, Iruka-san!" Naruto said, and dashed off toward the stairs. Even if he didn't bring back a medic-nin, that ought to keep him busy for a while. If they were really lucky, Yukiko thought, he'd wear himself out a bit as he ran around.

"Good fight, Iruka," Naga said. "And really good thinking."

Iruka flushed and scratched the base of his ponytail. "Well, I was so busy trying not to pay attention to her clothes that I didn't have time to get nervous. In all my other exams, I started worrying that things would go wrong, and they did. This time everything went right."

"...Are you saying we should have worn bikinis during training, to help you concentrate?" Yukiko asked with a grin.

Iruka turned even more red and waved his hands wildly. "No! No! Oh, look, they're announcing the next fight!"

"You're lucky I'm feeling nice or I'd yell at you for ducking the issue," Yukiko said. "So, who's up?"

Naga whapped her on the shoulder. "Sit up and look."

"I'm too tired."

"Lazy."

"Please don't argue. It's Hyuuga Shiro vs. Shinkan -- the kunoichi from Hidden Mist," Iruka said.

Yukiko hauled herself upright and peered down into the arena. "She's the one with the swords, right?"

Iruka nodded. "Yes, she uses daisho -- it's an odd choice for a ninja. This should be an interesting fight. Both Shiro and Shinkan are close-range fighters, so this is all about speed, reach, and feints; it's a race to see if he can shut down her inner coils before she can slice him to ribbons."

"Better her than me," Naga said. "Can't fight a Hyuuga bare-handed, not unless you're crazy. At least she has a katana."

Hisen dropped his hand and started the fight, but neither ninja moved to attack. Shiro folded his hands into the sleeves of his white jacket and bowed, letting his loose hair swing down in front of his face. Shinkan pressed her palms together and returned the bow; her mottled, loose-sleeved shirt billowed as she straightened.

"I've always wanted to fight a Hyuuga," she said, loudly enough to carry through the arena. "I've heard a lot about the strength of the Gentle Fist, and I'm glad to test my swords against you."

Shiro frowned slightly, but sank into a defensive stance and beckoned her to attack. Shinkan drew her katana and wakizashi, set her feet, and darted forward.

Naga whistled as the two fighters dodged and feinted, slashed and struck. "They're _fast_ ," she said. "Shiro's a lot better than the last time I watched him fight -- I wouldn't want to face either of them."

"Can you see who's winning?" Yukiko asked. "I can't even tell who's been hit."

"Shinkan, I think." Naga frowned and squinted down at the arena, her eyes flickering back and forth to follow the battle. "Hard to see, but yeah, she's winning. She got Shiro's arm -- see how he's favoring it? Katana gives her the reach advantage. And she's faster, just enough to keep blocking him with her dagger."

"I thought the Hyuuga had some unblockable taijutsu attack. Why isn't he using it?"

"Not all Hyuuga can use the advanced forms of the Gentle Fist, and the Sixty-Four Hands strike is definitely advanced," Iruka said. "I'm impressed that Shiro's blocked most of Shinkan's attacks without being cut -- it takes a lot of skill to judge the right angle to block a sword."

"Or very good eyes," Yukiko said, "which he has, of course."

Iruka nodded, but added, "I think the Sharingan is generally more useful for that sort of thing than the Byakugan -- I've heard that it allows a ninja to predict movements from the smallest muscle twitches, whereas it's a bit harder to predict sword trajectories from chakra pulses. Sooner or later he's bound to miss."

Just then, Shiro finally landed a strike to Shinkan's side.

"Maybe I spoke too soon-- oh!" Shinkan knocked Shiro's left arm aside with her katana, taking advantage of his extended right, and slammed her foot into his knee; he fell to the ground and she brought her sword back around to rest at his throat.

"A sacrifice ploy," Iruka said with satisfaction. "One strike rarely disrupts anything irreparable, and she ended the fight without serious injury on either side. Kakashi's reports were right -- she's the dangerous one on her team."

Yukiko agreed. Special techniques could usually be countered or avoided, but an opponent who could _think_... well, that was the kind of person to watch for.

\---------------

Naruto reappeared just then with a medic-nin in tow. He pointed out Iruka, and then hopped up onto a seat beside Yukiko. "Hey, hey, did they finish fighting? Who won? Was it cool? Were there any 'splosions, or lots of blood and stuff?"

Yukiko smiled. "Shinkan, a Mist-nin, beat Hyuuga Shiro of the Leaf. I thought it was pretty cool, but there weren't any explosions, just some very high-level taijutsu and swordwork."

Naruto crossed his eyes and frowned. "That's _boring_ \-- 'splosions are a lot cooler." Then he looked over at Iruka and a flash of guilt crossed his face. "...Well, swords are kinda cool. But I'm gonna learn ninjutsu! It's more fun."

"What about genjutsu?" Yukiko asked. "Illusions are pretty fun too."

"Maaaaaybe," Naruto said, and then bounced onto his feet and pointed at the display boards. "Hey, hey, what're they doing now? What's that say, Yukiko-neechan?"

Yukiko looked over at the boards. "That says 'intermission,' kid -- that means there's going to be a little break, like when you get free time between lessons at school. We can go get some food and not miss any fights. Do you want anything?"

"Ramen!" Naruto gave her a look that rather eloquently conveyed the sheer idiocy of assuming he would ever _not_ want ramen. "Pork ramen! Or shrimp ramen! Yeah, shrimp ramen!"

Yukiko levered herself upright and grabbed one of Naruto's flailing hands. "Kid, they don't usually sell ramen at concession stands. But we can probably buy some dango..." She motioned toward the gap in the balcony wall that led toward the main audience sections of the great arena, and hoped he wouldn't protest too much.

"They _should_ have ramen, but dango's okay. Just no icky vegetables. Come on, Yukiko-neechan!"

"Save my seat!" Yukiko said to Iruka and Naga as Naruto dragged her off into the crowds that filled the main tiers of the arena.

It seemed that at least three quarters of Konoha's population, both ninja and civilian, had turned out to watch the tournament -- that wasn't actually surprising, since the chuunin exam rotated through the hidden villages in their network of allies, so each village only hosted the tournament once every few years. This was one of the few chances for people to see special techniques displayed in the open instead of practiced in secret. This was also a chance to cheer for Leaf-nin and air out old wartime grievances that still lingered despite a decade of peace.

After the twentieth stranger stopped Yukiko and Naruto to offer congratulations on her victory, berate her for defeating Akaro and thus lowering the reputation of the Uchiha, pass on congratulations to Iruka, or commiserate over Shiro's loss, Yukiko cast a small genjutsu over herself so she looked like a blue-eyed girl with spiky blonde hair, who was _clearly_ Naruto's older sister and who bore _no_ resemblance whatsoever to the Ayakawa Yukiko who'd just fought down in the arena.

"You look funny," Naruto told her. "Your hair's like a porcupine."

"Well, what does that say about you?" Yukiko asked. She ruffled his spiky hair and grinned as he squirmed out from under her hand. "Hey... do you want to be sneaky and cut ahead in line? I can make everyone think we were always in front of them."

"Hehehe! Yeah!"

Yukiko quickly cast a small distraction genjutsu -- the one Hoshi, her old jounin-sensei, had called Somebody Else's Problem -- and dragged Naruto through the crowd around the concession stands. This wasn't really an honorable use of ninpou, but she told herself she deserved a little bit of fun after the way people kept badgering her. They slipped into line behind a small group of Uchiha -- a couple and their two sons -- since she wasn't going to risk passing them, even if they didn't have their Sharingan activated at the moment.

"--reminded that our bloodline doesn't make us invincible," the man was saying. "We're born with an advantage, but we can't let our training slack or assume that others are weak. Akaro lost because he discounted that woman and let her control the pace of their fight."

The older boy, who wore a chuunin vest despite looking young enough to still be in the academy, nodded. "He gave her too much time to plan -- he should have struck with a fire jutsu much earlier. He overestimated his capacity."

"Now Itachi-kun, there's nothing wrong with showing a bit of compassion to people who aren't up to your standards," the woman said. She turned to the vendor. "Two dango and a cup of ice cream for Sasuke-chan, please."

"Mama!"

The woman smiled down at her younger son. "I'm sorry, Sasuke-kun. I'll have to remember you're a big boy now. Why, you'll be in the academy this autumn! That's something to be proud of."

The boy ducked his head, letting his ragged black hair fall around his face. "But I'm not early. Aniki got in early."

His brother squatted and tapped the boy's shoulder, a small smile on his tired face. "Hey. Don't worry about that. You'll learn to be strong." The boy beamed up at his brother.

Yukiko blinked, suddenly recognizing him; this was the boy who'd scowled at her like a little thundercloud, and then laughed at her pathetic attempt to cheer for Iruka. He certainly switched moods fast.

The vendor handed the dango and ice cream to the woman, who passed them to her sons while her husband paid for the food. The boys ran off, the younger trailing after the older, and the parents followed them into the crowd.

Yukiko shook off her thoughts and stepped up to the counter. "Five dango, please." That would be one each for her, Naga, and Iruka, and two for Naruto, who was a bottomless pit even when he wasn't eating his beloved ramen.

Naruto tugged on her jacket and she glanced down. "Hey, hey, Yukiko-neechan? Do you think I'm gonna learn to be strong?" He seemed oddly pensive.

Yukiko let her hand rest on his shoulder. "Kid, I _know_ you're going to be strong. You're going to be Hokage, right? Of course you'll be strong."

"...You would've kicked that guy's butt even if he didn't over-stimate his cap'city, right?"

Huh. Yukiko gathered her thoughts while she paid for the dango and handed two to Naruto. How should she answer that?

"Well, maybe I would have won, and maybe I wouldn't have," she started. "It's hard to say. You see, the Uchiha have an advantage against people who use genjutsu and genjutsu is what I'm good at. But they're not so good against people who use taijutsu or weapons, or who have other bloodline limits that they can't copy or see through. Everybody has a weak point somewhere. So even if that boy ends up in your academy class this fall, I'm sure you'll be better than he is at something."

Judging by the way Naruto smiled and starting bouncing again, she'd found the right answer.

This family thing was a little harder than it sounded at first, but, Yukiko thought as she nibbled on her dango, it was definitely worth the trouble.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Omake:** Hisen dropped his arm and Suisen leaped backwards; light gathered in blinding glows at her wrists and ankles and on her forehead-protector. "You can't fight what you can't see!" she called.
> 
> Iruka slipped a pair of sunglasses out of his pocket. "Whatever."
> 
> Suisen pouted. "That's not fair!"


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter the Thirteenth, in which we learn a bit more about Iruka and Naga's families, Naga discovers the joy of mud, Naruto learns origami, two Mist-nin have fun, and Kakashi and Yukiko play a little game. You're getting sleepy. You're getting very sleepy...

Yukiko dropped her genjutsu in order to get back into the restricted section of the arena, reverting to her natural face and her straight, blue-green hair. "Now you look like seaweed," Naruto told her.

"Better than a porcupine," she said, and ruffled his hair with her free hand. She handed one dango to Naga and sank into her seat with a sigh of relief. Her thigh wound wasn't too deep and the medic-nin had done a good job wrapping it, but it still ached and sent tiny lightning strikes of pain up her hip when she stepped too heavily. The shallow gash just below her ribs stung where sweat seeped under the bandage and into the raw flesh; Yukiko stripped off her jacket and tugged her shirt away from her side, trying to air-dry the cut.

"Where's Iruka?" she asked as Naruto dashed across the aisle and up several rows to tug on Taizen's sleeve.

Naga twitched her shoulder. "Said he was going to find his great-aunt, since he wouldn't have to fight for a while. I think she can't handle stairs -- some old war injury -- so she's over on the far side."

The far side of the arena held the section specially set up for the wounded, old veterans, the elderly, and the handicapped. "He said once or twice that he has a clan, but he never talks about them," Yukiko said. She shaded her eyes and peered across the arena, trying to spot Iruka's distinctive high ponytail. "I wonder... maybe we can get him to introduce us after the test?"

"Whatever."

Suddenly a bell clanged, signaling the end of the intermission, and Yukiko looked up at the announcement boards. "Makiba Kohaku vs. Tonoike Naga. Huh." She looked over at Naga and grinned. "I'll save your dango. Break his leg."

Naga grinned back, gold eyes shining, and vaulted over the balcony railing.

\---------------

Makiba Kohaku was one of Hino Suisen's teammates and a master of soft earth jutsu -- he specialized in instant quicksand, sudden pit traps, and miniature localized earthquakes. Yukiko studied him as he faced Naga in the center of the arena. He was short, stocky, and heavily tanned, wore brown pants and a sleeveless olive green shirt, and kept his hair trapped under a tan bandana. He had no weapons besides the standard kunai and shuriken holster, and his was oddly flat, almost empty-looking. He didn't look very threatening, but he _did_ look like he'd be hard to find in the plains around Hidden Grass, which was probably the idea.

Yukiko was fairly sure she could beat Kohaku -- the Grass wasn't known for genjutsu or illusion-breaking techniques -- but she wasn't sure how well Naga would fare against a ninjutsu master, particularly one who could turn her footing against her. If she could get close, Naga could probably take Kohaku out easily, but it would be hard to land a good blow if she couldn't keep her balance.

Hisen raised his hand and started the match.

Kohaku sank into the earth, tiny ripples of dirt marking the spot where he'd stood. Yukiko gaped; _that_ hadn't been in Kakashi's reports. Naga stood frozen for one long moment, as if she didn't believe her eyes either, and then leaped into the air a bare heartbeat before the ground fell away beneath her feet.

The next minute and a half looked more like a circus act than a fight, as Naga leaped, flipped, and ran, staying mere seconds and inches ahead of Kohaku's unstable earth. Every footfall, every landing, sent tremors through the ground and he tracked her by those vibrations. She had no way to retaliate; he was hidden underground.

But he couldn't stay down forever. Suddenly a bandana-covered head rose through the dirt and Kohaku gasped for air. Naga whirled and dove -- her arms shot forward -- her hands glowed with flame -- and she flipped herself into an aerial somersault, nothing but a singed bandana in her grip.

"Shit!"

Naga dropped the cloth and ran, trying to stay ahead of Kohaku. She stumbled -- her left foot sank deep into thick, sucking quicksand -- but she reached forward, dug her fingers into the ground twelve feet away, and pulled her body to her hands. Her foot popped free with a wet _schlock_ and she launched herself back into the air.

Now Naga scanned the ground more carefully, choosing her footing and handholds with caution. There was no pattern to the patches of quicksand that Yukiko could see from her vantage point in the balcony, and even if there was, she doubted Naga could find it with all her attention caught up in the adrenaline-soaked rush of motion. How long could Kohaku burn this level of chakra? Would he tire before Naga missed a leap, or would Naga catch him the next time he surfaced for air?

It turned out to be a moot point; suddenly Naga landed and simply stopped moving. Two seconds later the earth collapsed underneath her feet, but she held her balance as she sank into a deep hole that filled in to hold her legs and arms imprisoned.

She turned her head, searching for her opponent. "Show yourself!"

Kohaku rose from the earth, bent over with his hands braced against his thighs, and gasped for breath. "Are you crazy? Why'd you stop? You're trapped now, you know. I win."

Naga twitched her shoulder. "Not until you knock me out."

He took two steps toward her, and then stopped, a wary expression on his face. "I'm not falling for that trick. I'll stay over here, and you can just smother until you're unconscious." Kohaku fixed his hands into an ox seal and earth closed over Naga's head. He waited, panting, for nearly three minutes, until the small tremors within the cocoon of earth stopped. Then he let the dirt flow away and fill the narrow pit from the bottom up, which raised Naga to the arena floor. She lay slumped in a tangle of limbs, still and silent.

Yukiko held her breath. Kohaku walked over to confirm his win.

Naga exploded into motion. One leg hooked sideways and swept Kohaku off-balance while her arm shot forward and slammed him to the ground. She rose to her feet only to drop back down on one knee, letting gravity lend weight to her fist as it smashed against his jaw. For good measure, she hit him another three times.

"Idiot." She backed up a step and prodded him with her foot. "He's out cold," she called to Hisen. Then she unwound the bandage from her right hand, extended her tongue nearly a foot, and wiped mud out of her mouth.

Yukiko blinked. If Naga had just been holding her breath, why did she have dirt in her mouth? She'd figured that Naga was trying to lure Kohaku within striking range of her head or tongue, but had she planned something for being buried alive as well?

Naga strode over to the stairs, leaving Hisen to deal with Kohaku's unconscious and bloody body. "Didn't break his leg, but I might've broken his jaw," she said as she dropped into a seat next to Yukiko. Then she wiped her tongue again and grimaced. " _Shit_ , mud tastes bad."

"What in the name of the kami did you _do?_ " Yukiko asked.

Naga looked smug. "I made a plan. If he got too close, I'd pin him with my tongue and figure he'd get grossed out and drop the ninjutsu. Or I'd just stick out my neck and _bite_ him -- that always creeps people out. If he tried to smother me, I'd use my tongue to make an air hole and figure he'd be so worried about my arms that he wouldn't notice." She plucked her dango from Yukiko's hand and favored her teammate with a cockeyed smile. "I was right."

"And that, children, is what we call 'strategy,'" a voice said from behind them. "Good job."

"Kakashi!" Yukiko winced as her abrupt turn pulled on the gash in her side. "Stop _doing_ that!"

Kakashi's eye drooped in exaggerated sorrow. "Can't I come to congratulate my students? I'll be able to hold this over Asuma's head for months -- all three of you passed the first round, while two of his team already washed out. And his Uchiha lost to genjutsu, no less. I told you that sidestep jutsu could be useful."

He looked marvelously innocent and proud, but Yukiko could _feel_ him smirking somewhere under his mask. She studied his hair carefully; it was still faintly pink, and she wondered if he had any vengeance planned. She also wondered if this Asuma was the sort of jounin-sensei who regarded losses as a learning experience, or the type who defended his team against anyone who showed up their defects, no matter how necessary a dose of humility might be.

"We're not your students," Naga grumbled.

"Oh? Then I must have hallucinated that fire jutsu around your hands. Remind me to get my eyes checked tomorrow." Kakashi dropped sideways into a seat in front of Yukiko, swung his feet up onto the bench, and leaned back on his elbows. "Where's Iruka?"

"With family, on the far side," Yukiko said. "Now shush, they're announcing the next fight."

\---------------

Yellow letters flashed on the boards. "Aburame Kuroko vs. Nagoyaka Kafunnokaze!" Kuroko stood from her seat among her family and walked toward the stairs. The green-haired Grass-nin who'd asked about killing techniques -- Kafunnokaze, Yukiko assumed -- pulled a pair of gloves from a pocket in his long black coat, and sauntered after her.

"Interesting," Kakashi said. "Either all of Asuma's students wash out, or all the Grass-nin do."

"They could still be promoted even though they lost," Yukiko protested half-heartedly.

Kakashi shrugged, a minimal lift of his shoulders. "That happens, but they didn't fight well enough or think fast enough to impress anyone. The Uchiha and the mirror girl didn't follow through on their advantages, the dirt boy only has one trick and he wasn't careful enough when he thought he'd won, and the Hyuuga needs more practice."

"Suisen had Iruka running, but he dodged too well for her to really hit him. How could she have followed through?" Yukiko asked.

Kakashi tipped his head back and grinned with his eye. "Think of it as an exercise -- you tell me. And don't forget her other advantage over poor Iruka-kun..."

Yukiko swiped at him with her extra dango, but he ducked, rolled to the side, and snatched the food from her hand. Yukiko sighed. "Pervert. Say, shouldn't the fight be starting?"

Kakashi glanced down into the arena. "They seem to be undoing the quicksand patches the dirt boy left when he took a nap." Then he turned to Yukiko, somehow managing to leer with nothing more than a subtle shift of his posture. "Anyway, I prefer to think of myself as a humble connoisseur of the beauties of the human body, but I'm willing to let you try to change my ways. I don't suppose you'd be interested in dinner and drinks this evening...?"

Yukiko blinked. He couldn't possibly be serious -- not with that tone of voice -- so what was he trying to provoke her into doing...? She blinked again, and then had a perfectly evil idea.

"Dinner," Yukiko said with a slow smile, "sounds _wonderful_. On behalf of the team, I accept. And I'm sure Naruto will be thrilled to eat at a fancy restaurant. Hey, kid!" she called across the aisle as Kakashi winced and Naga snickered.

Naruto looked up from Taizen's origami lesson. "Yeah, Yukiko-neechan? Hey, hey, look -- Taizen-san can make frogs and birds and cats and things, all out of paper! I made a flower!" He held up a smudged piece of orange paper, folded into something vaguely reminiscent of a tulip.

"Neat. You'll have to show me how to do that. Anyway, Kakashi-san is taking us all out for dinner tonight. It'll be a nice restaurant, so you'll have to behave."

"Sure, Yukiko-neechan!" Naruto said, and turned back to watch Taizen's nimble fingers produce a sheet of paper from nowhere and shape it into a fish.

"Your mother has good hands," Yukiko said to Naga. "I didn't see where she keeps her paper -- does she use genjutsu?"

Naga looked sour. "Just sleight-of-hand. She likes things like origami and card tricks -- says misdirection and subtlety are good for more than just killing. She used to be a shinobi, but she quit when that bastard dishonored our clan. Now she runs a _teahouse_."

"More precisely, your mother runs a teahouse that caters to ninja -- the rooms are open and well-lit, the windows are small and high up, the tables are widely spaced, and her servers prepare the tea and snacks right at the tables or out on a central counter so people aren't worried about poison," Kakashi said, oddly serious for once. "Sasayaki Taizen was a very effective infiltrator in the great wars, and she still knows how to put people at ease."

Naga looked unconvinced. "Whatever. It's still a teahouse."

"You can take us there," Yukiko said to Kakashi. "Maybe Taizen-san will give you a discount if you act pitiful enough."

"Like this?" Kakashi essayed a fair imitation of Iruka and Naruto's puppy-dog eyes, and then shrugged and resumed his lazy slouch. "It's easier to just pay the bill. In any case, Hisen seems ready to start the fight."

\---------------

Nagoyaka Kafunnokaze was the most puzzling of the three Grass-nin. His profile stated that he was a master of drugs and poisons -- a very useful skill for a ninja, but not one that seemed particularly suited to combat. And yet Fugaku Kohai, the jounin assigned to the Grass-nin during the second test, described him as the most dangerous fighter of that team.

Yukiko wondered how he fought.

Aburame Kuroko was a member of the most reclusive and mysterious of Konoha's great clans. The insect masters guarded their secrets so carefully that nobody really knew if their connection with the kikkai was a bloodline limit, a summoning contract, or a peculiar mix of the two. Their ability to influence other insects argued for a bloodline limit, but the way the kikkai actually lived _inside_ their bodies, receiving chakra and a nest in return for their service, argued for a contract. Quite frankly, Yukiko didn't care; insects were creepy enough that she had no desire to think about them any more than she absolutely had to.

Besides being damn creepy, Kuroko seemed to be calm under pressure. She'd been the one to keep Akaro in line when their teams met during the second test. In retrospect, Yukiko was glad she'd faced Akaro instead of his teammate; at least Akaro was arrogant enough to give her time to make plans. Kuroko's insects could probably help their mistress spot genjutsu, and they'd bother Yukiko enough that she wouldn't be able to think clearly. And once a ninja stopped thinking, she was in trouble.

It was a little disloyal not to support fellow Leaf-nin, but Yukiko secretly hoped that Kafunnokaze won this fight. She didn't want _any_ chance of facing Kuroko in the second round.

Hisen dropped his hand and leaped to the edge of the arena. "Begin!"

Kuroko raised her arms; kikkai poured from the sleeves of her loose, violet blouse. Most hovered in a thick cloud around her, but Yukiko spotted a few streams of black as they broke from the main swarm and flew toward Kafunnokaze. "Are you a ninjutsu master?" she called, sounding as if she were sitting in the academy discussing the nature of chakra instead of standing in the great arena at the start of a fight.

Kafunnokaze pulled something small and dark from one of his pockets -- a folded paper packet, Yukiko realized -- and tore it open with his teeth. "Not exactly," he said as he spit out the scrap of paper and dumped the packet's contents into a silk pouch. He flicked three shuriken toward Kuroko, who dodged. They sank harmlessly into the ground beside her.

"That's good," she said, as calmly as if he hadn't just attacked her. "The kikkai like ninjutsu masters -- more chakra for them to eat -- but it's hard to learn from an opponent if you never see his techniques."

Kafunnokaze grinned as he drew a glass vial from a slot on his wide belt, tucked it into the pouch, and dropped the silk bag by his feet. Then he pulled a yellow paper packet from a pocket inside his coat, near his heart. "Yeah? Well, I don't think you'll learn much from me even if you watch through those bugs on my shoulders. By the way, I soak my coat in contact poisons; they'll drop dead in a few minutes." As Kuroko blinked, he formed five hand seals, ripped open the packet, and cast red powder onto the sudden wind.

The kikkai scattered like autumn leaves and Kuroko wove a wind jutsu of her own to counter the attack; the powder blew up and sideways into the stands. A twenty foot wide section of the audience doubled over, sneezing.

Yukiko blinked. Huh. So that was how you fought with drugs. No wonder Kafunnokaze had asked about killing moves -- if he slipped, or if an opponent countered unexpectedly, he could easily poison half the audience.

"That's interesting," Kuroko said as she let her wind die. "My kikkai can't touch you, your powders can't touch me, and our winds can deflect any weapons. Shall we try close combat?"

Kafunnokaze grinned again. "Yeah, why not." He snapped his gloved fingers and suddenly held a faceted crystal on a long chain, which he swung back and forth like a pendulum. Motes of light sparked and reflected off its angled planes. "You're getting sleepy. You're getting very sleepy. Your little bugs are getting sleepy too. When I snap my fingers again, you'll do whatever I say, because you're so sleepy and it's so much easier not to think..."

Yukiko raised her eyebrows. " _Hypnotism?_ " she said to Kakashi. "What in the name of all the kami does he expect _that_ to do?"

"It's a distraction," Kakashi said without turning. "Watch."

Down in the arena, Kuroko frowned and called her kikkai back to sheathe her arms and flit in a halo around her head. Kafunnokaze stood his ground, swinging the crystal back and forth, back and forth, as Kuroko drew a kunai and warily walked forward. "You're getting sleepy, very sleepy. Each step is harder, like dragging your feet through sucking mud in a rainstorm, like wading through snow in midwinter. You're getting sleepy..."

She was ten steps away. The kikkai pulled inward, landing on Kuroko's hair and shoulders. She was six steps away. One insect fell to the ground. Five steps. Another fell. And a third. Four steps. Then a fifth, a tenth, a hundredth, until the entire swarm pattered to the earth like light black hail.

Kuroko stared at the black carpet. Kafunnokaze grinned, snapped the faceted glass back up into his sleeve, and dropped a torn and empty packet from his other hand. "Yeah, that about does it," he said. "Not all my powders are colored, see? Now it's your turn to go to sleep." He raised his hands toward his collar as if to pull out a new packet; while Kuroko focused on his fingers, his right foot casually stomped on the silk pouch that lay by his feet. The vial inside shattered with a muffled crunch, and he kicked the bag into Kuroko's hands.

"Say goodnight!" Kafunnokaze yanked a black cloth up from his collar and over his mouth and nose. Greenish smoke boiled from the silk pouch, wreathing around Kuroko's face before she had any chance to drop the bag or start a wind jutsu to disperse the drug. She reacted faster than Yukiko expected, though -- hurled the bag away with her left hand and sank her kunai into Kafunnokaze's shoulder with her right.

As he yanked out the knife, Kuroko lurched, swayed, and sank to her knees among her fallen kikkai. Gently she gathered insects into her hands. "Will they live?"

Kafunnokaze seemed surprised by the sudden heat in her voice. "Yeah. They're just sleeping." He tugged his mask back down as a light breeze blew the smoke away from them. "Um, you're going to black out in about thirty seconds. If you surrender I'll give you a hand up before you crush your bugs."

Kuroko swayed again and steadied herself with one hand in the patch of dirt she'd swept clear of kikkai. "Yes."

"You surrender?"

She nodded. As Kafunnokaze crouched to grab her shoulders and haul her to her feet, she said, "I did learn something from you. Next year, I'll be ready." And then she sagged against him like a puppet with cut strings.

Kafunnokaze dragged her clear in silence.

\---------------

As Hisen and the arena attendants carried Kuroko over to the stairs and swept her kikkai onto a cloth for easy transport, Kakashi stretched idly. "Now there's a ninja who knows the value of misdirection. And I have to give Asuma credit -- at least the Aburame recognized that she wasn't ready this year, and she'll learn a lot from that fight."

"Like what?" Naga asked.

Kakashi raised his eyebrow. "This isn't the academy; you tell me."

"Not to make assumptions," Yukiko said after a few seconds. "That's where Akaro went wrong, and Suisen and Kohaku -- they assumed they were stronger and smarter, and didn't allow for any surprises."

Naga looked thoughtful. "I guess. And not to hesitate. She could've attacked while he had that crystal out -- can't do hand seals with your fingers tangled up -- but she was too cautious." She grimaced. "Kuroko's always too cautious. She's real cold, too."

"She seemed to care about her kikkai," Yukiko said. "Maybe that's why she's cautious -- if she gets hurt, they get hurt too."

"They're just bugs. Who cares?"

"Just bugs?" Kakashi turned and fixed Naga with a lazy eye. "Ah. Suppose you summoned a raven and I reached out, like _this_ ," -- his hand blurred with speed, and Naga yelped as her earring vanished -- "and wrung its neck?" He let the fragile mother-of-pearl disks, suspended on their silver chains, dangle loosely between his fingers. "After all, it's just a bird." His fingers tightened a fraction and the silver hook started to bend.

"Okay, okay, I get it! Now give that back -- it belonged to my grandmother!" Naga grabbed her earring as Kakashi dropped it, and fussed over the compressed hook fastening. "I swear by all the kami, all the demons, and all the blood and tears of my ancestors, if you broke my earring..."

"Then you'll break my leg. I know." Kakashi shrugged and turned back to the arena. "In a few years, you _might_ be good enough that I'd have to take you seriously."

"Bastard."

"Shush, both of you." Yukiko kicked Naga's legs, and then regretted it as her thigh wound complained with a flash of heat and pain. "The last fight's starting, and I want to watch without you two distracting me."

"You should be more considerate of the man whose selfless instruction got you this far, and who's going to pay for your dinner despite what your little brat did to his hair," Kakashi said, but he sat a fraction straighter in his seat and didn't argue further.

\---------------

The last two genin, Aishou and Mouten Junichi, were teammates from Hidden Mist. Aishou, a tall, skinny boy in a gray bodysuit, used ninjutsu to condense mist from the air, and then either heat it to nearly boiling or cool it to nearly freezing. Either attack was painful and disorienting. Mouten Junichi, his shorter, stockier teammate, fought with his eyes closed, which sounded very odd to Yukiko. But their jounin 'client' from the second test swore that Junichi tracked motion _better_ with his eyes shut, and could bind or slice an enemy with razor wires before anyone else realized the group was under attack.

That reeked of a bloodline limit or a secret family jutsu.

Evidently Kakashi was curious as well, since he slid his forehead protector up from his left eye, exposing the Sharingan as the two boys bowed to each other down in the arena.

"Is that really fair, to copy jutsu during the exam?" Yukiko whispered to him.

Kakashi shrugged. "We're allied with the Sand and the Grass, but with the Mist, it's only a truce that nobody really wants to break. I'd like to have some advantages if we ever go back to war with them. Facing unknown and deadly ninjutsu... well, that isn't high on my list of fun things to do. Besides, if I died, think of all the books I'd never get to read!"

Huh. It still seemed a bit like cheating, but then, the Sharingan was _designed_ to help ninja cheat and steal techniques. Some jounin-sensei refused to send their teams to any chuunin exams hosted by Konoha, because they knew the Uchiha would be waiting to copy any special jutsu. Anyone here had tacitly accepted that risk.

Down in the arena, Junichi closed his eyes, formed a single ox seal, and settled a coil of wire into his gloved hand. Aishou unscrewed the cap of a canteen slung around his shoulder, poured out a handful of water, and flung it at the other boy. It fell a foot short, and they both laughed.

"Wanna make a bet? Loser covers the winner's cooking shifts going home," Aishou called.

Junichi grinned. "You're on. And you're going _down_."

"Dream on, man."

As wire lashed forward and Aishou's fingers flickered through seals, Yukiko couldn't help smiling along with the boys. They made it all the way to the finals of the chuunin exam, laid their futures on the line, and then treated it like a sparring exercise, or a game. They were honestly having fun, even when wire sliced lines of blood on Aishou's arms and steam scalded Junichi's cheek.

"I guess fighting a teammate's different from fighting someone you don't know," she mused.

Kakashi blinked. "Ah? Yes, it's different. It can be fun, but it can also get very bitter. Teammates know all each other's habits and weaknesses, and can use that familiarity. Like that." He nodded toward the arena, where Aishou had just snagged a loop of wire on a kunai.

The wire snapped with a singing wail; the cut ends lashed back toward Junichi, who rolled sideways to avoid them... right into a cloud of steam. When he rolled out, his hands were clamped tightly over his nose and mouth, and Aishou took advantage of his distraction to dive forward and pin him to the ground.

The boys rolled over twice before Aishou got a knife against Junichi's back. Junichi went limp, and slapped the ground with an open palm. "Shit! I give. You win," he panted. "Now get that knife away from my kidney."

Aishou waved Hisen over to confirm the result. "Sorry about that, man. But you know I can't cook."

"You are such a _jerk_ , Aishou," Junichi growled, but he smiled as he said it.

The two Mist-nin picked themselves up, dusted each other off, and headed to the stairs. Hisen vanished in a puff of smoke and handily beat them back to the balcony. "We'll have another break before the second round," he told the genin as he pressed a button to display _INTERMISSION_ on the announcement screens. "I need to program the results of this round and set up a new random selection. So go relax."

Yukiko stretched her arms above her head and looked at Naga. "Huh. We have at least fifteen minutes. Want to go find Iruka?"


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter the Fourteenth, in which Iruka gets teased by his aunt, a minor political crisis is peacefully resolved, Naruto distributes presents, Yukiko feels stupid, Kakashi juggles his masks, and Naga kicks someone _hard_.

As soon as they left the guarded balcony, Yukiko reinvoked her genjutsu disguise to protect herself from the audience. Naga simply glared any well wishers into submission, while Kakashi managed to be nearly invisible, despite how difficult it should have been for a masked man with one eye and such distinctive hair to vanish.

Yukiko shoved through the mass of civilians, slipped around her fellow shinobi, and wondered if Taizen would mind terribly if she spilled something colorful and sticky on Kakashi during dinner.

She sighed. It didn't matter anyway -- it wasn't as if she'd be able to keep him from dodging.

After nearly ten minutes, they reached their goal: a section of seats bounded by ramps instead of stairs, and located beside one of Konoha's few elevators. The large, boxy platform was mostly open to the air; steel bars criss-crossed in a loose fence to keep wheelchairs from rolling off the sides, but the gaps were easily wide enough to throw weapons through, and to allow even a wounded ninja to haul herself up and off the elevator, if need be. Shinobi didn't like confined spaces where their movement was under someone else's control, and most civilians didn't want to pay for full elevators -- Yukiko had two small dumbwaiters in her building, one beside each stairwell, for hauling furniture and laundry up and down from the top floors, but they were hand-operated, to keep her power bills low.

Iruka's distinctive ponytail bobbed from a seat near the balcony railing, as he bent down to speak with an elderly woman -- his great-aunt, Yukiko presumed. She was thin and frail, like grass dried by the late summer sun, and her iron-gray hair was braided and wound into a neat bun secured by two senbon. A polished oak cane rested across her black skirt, and her blue shirt was embroidered with silver waves. Her dark eyes danced with interest in her seamed face as Yukiko, Naga, and Kakashi approached.

"These are your teammates, Iruka-kun?" she asked. "Well! Please introduce us."

Iruka flushed. "Um. This is Tonoike Naga, who's a taijutsu expert; Hatake Kakashi-san, who agreed to stand as our jounin-sensei during training; and Ayakawa Yukiko, who doesn't normally have blonde hair. Everyone, this is Umino Sadako, my great-aunt."

"And retired chuunin," Sadako added, waving at her forehead protector. "My leg isn't much use these days -- not even Tsunade-hime herself could fix my knee after the last war -- but I still have teeth." She smiled. "Please sit down. Iruka-kun has told me so much about you that I feel as though we're already friends."

"Aunt Sadako!" Iruka flushed again and scratched the base of his ponytail. "Um. Congratulations on your fight, Naga. That must have been tricky."

"He cheered for you," Sadako confided in a stage whisper. She patted Iruka's thigh as he tried to spontaneously combust with embarrassment. "He's always been an enthusiastic boy."

Naga snickered. Yukiko and Kakashi, both still standing, exchanged glances. Kakashi winked, and Yukiko rolled her eyes at him.

"So, what brings the three of you to visit an old woman like me?" Sadako asked.

"Merely seeking my wayward student, but if I'd known he was hiding a beauty like you, I'd have been here much sooner," Kakashi said lightly.

Sadako swatted at his hand. "Beauty? It's true that good looks run in the family -- my brother had the whole village after him in his day, my mother could still turn heads when she was older than I am now, and Iruka-kun here... well!" Yukiko would almost have sworn that even Iruka's _hair_ was flushing.

"But I know flattery when I hear it," Sadako continued with a smile, "and you're a liar if I ever heard one."

Kakashi shrugged and leaned back against the balcony railing. "I learned from the best."

"From _your_ jounin-sensei?" Sadako raised a skeptical eyebrow. "I'm sure you did. Now, Iruka-kun isn't much at subterfuge -- that's not his strength as a ninja. It wasn't mine, either. But you... you're nothing but masks, aren't you? Be careful that you don't forget who you are underneath them."

"Aunt Sadako, please stop," Iruka said, managing to keep his voice steady. "Kakashi-sensei has helped us a lot."

Kakashi met Sadako's stare with a placid eye. "Don't worry, Iruka-kun, I'm not upset. All ninja need to look underneath the underneath. It's never a bad thing to be reminded."

"Oh, I _like_ you," Sadako said. Her dark eyes sparkled with mischief. "Iruka-kun, you can keep him -- and these two lovely young kunoichi as well."

Naga burst out laughing. Kakashi winked at Iruka. Iruka sputtered incoherent protests. And Yukiko wondered if everyone she'd met since last autumn had a peculiar disorder that made them act more immature than Naruto.

"Well! It's been good to meet you all, but I think you should hurry back to your places before the next match is announced," Sadako said as Naga's laughter trailed off into intermittent snickers. "Good luck to you, Yukiko-san and Naga-chan, though you understand that I'll have to cheer for Iruka-kun if you end up facing him. The academy needs teachers like him. And he's family."

"And he's cute?" Kakashi asked idly. "I'll be in trouble then -- all my little genin are adorable!"

"I am _not_ adorable!" Naga growled.

"And humble, too! Your virtues know no bounds." Kakashi patted her on the head and casually dodged her retaliatory fist. Then he snagged her purple vest and Iruka's ponytail, and dragged the mismatched pair -- one snarling in outrage, one trying to sink through the floor from sheer mortification -- back around the rim of the arena.

"I swear by all the kami, I don't know them," Yukiko muttered, face buried in her hands. "I really, truly don't."

"So? Well, if they can embarrass you, then you obviously care about them -- and that's the first sign of a successful team. I think you're all very good for my nephew." Sadako patted Yukiko's shoulder with her thin, gnarled fingers. "Now, go catch up with that jounin rogue before he makes poor Iruka-kun develop a new ninjutsu to set himself on fire."

Sadako's laughter bubbled through the air as Yukiko hurried to catch up with her team.

\---------------

The remaining genin gathered around Okame Hisen and waited -- with varying degrees of patience -- for him to announce the next match. The red-haired Leaf-nin fiddled with the guts of the announcement board for nearly a minute, swearing once or twice under his breath, before he shut the programming panel and touched a button on the control pad.

"Right," he said. "You six are in random order again for this round, so who you fought last time doesn't matter. Any forfeits?"

The genin shrugged, shook their heads, and murmured denials.

"Okay. First match is... Aishou vs. Shinkan!"

As the names flashed on the huge boards, a stir ran through the crowd. Aishou had already faced one teammate last round. For him to face his other partner now...

"I object to this match!" Yukiko turned at the hoarse voice, and saw the grey-shrouded Mist jounin stride forward. His air filter masked his mouth and nose, and a loose cowl shadowed his face, but his eyes were drawn downward in a scowl. "Your machine is rigged, Leaf-nin. My students should not have to fight each other twice in a row."

Hisen stiffened. "You're calling the honor of the Leaf into question, Mist-nin. Be careful."

The Mist-nin tapped his ear, drawing attention to a small radio receiver. "The Mizukage supports my objection. Stand aside and let me examine your machine."

Hisen looked over to the high balcony where the Hokage sat in his chair office. The Mizukage, leader of Hidden Mist, sat to Sarutobi-sama's left, and the Master of Hidden Grass sat to his right. The Kazekage of Hidden Sand had declined to attend the third test, since none of his genin had qualified, but a Sand jounin stood at the end of the high balcony, her expression unreadable under her dark, stylized face paint.

Sarutobi-sama stood, tilted his wide hat back so his face was clearly visible, and raised his hand for attention. "A question has been raised about the drawing of lots. Please be patient while we resolve this."

"Let Mist and Grass examine the program," one of the Anbu guards told Hisen. "We have nothing to hide."

"I don't see the point," Naga said as the tall Mist-nin bent to examine the programming panel. The Grass kunoichi knelt beside him and prodded a bundle of wires with her claw-tipped glove; the lights flickered as she loosened the connections. "If the Mist-nin fight each other, then two of us will have to fight each other as well," Naga continued. "Besides, that Shinkan is probably going to pass anyway -- if she beat Shiro, she's _good_."

Kakashi shrugged. "It's politics -- we've never been on particularly good terms with Hidden Mist, and they'd love an excuse to show us up or break our truce. Even though this accusation is baseless, they've made our honor look questionable in the eyes of the daimyo watching the exam. That might hurt our success at attracting new contracts and missions."

"That's stupid," Naga said, and she folded her arms with an expression of great disgust.

"No, that's life," Yukiko said with a sigh. "Trust me, that's just how businesses work -- you can try to get ahead by being the best, or you can try to make your competition look bad. Fundamentally, Konoha _is_ a business, and so are all the other hidden villages. We just dress it up in pretty words about honor and loyalty so people forget that we're trying to earn money for killing people."

Naga twitched her shoulder. "Stop being so morbid."

"Yes, please do," Iruka said. "Besides, Konoha isn't only a business. This village is our home, and Fire Country is also our home. We do more than just kill people -- we protect people, we keep the roads safe, and we stop the daimyo from raising armies and using technology to build new weapons."

"Huh. Well, yes, that's true," Yukiko said, thinking about a book she'd once read, in which the author discussed the ways explosives and radios could easily be used to create vast armies of civilians, "but you _teach_ people to be ninja. You have to think like that."

Iruka frowned and rubbed his scar thoughtfully. "I don't, actually -- a lot of teachers never worry about the implications of their job, and others don't care much about morality as long as the Leaf is stronger than any potential enemies. But I think that if people are going to fight -- and I don't see any way to stop that, yet -- then it's important to teach children _why_ we fight, and why sometimes it's better _not_ to fight. It's just as important to learn how to make friends, because if we don't have friends, we'll die."

Kakashi made a startled noise. Yukiko spun around to study him, wondering what had made him lose his control, but she couldn't see anything interesting in his line of sight. Instead, Kakashi's eye had gone vague and unfocused, as if he were seeing something that wasn't there, or had lost himself in a memory. Then he blinked and noticed his audience. "What?" he asked.

"Um..." Iruka ventured.

Kakashi twitched under the weight of the three genin's scrutiny. Then he whipped out his little orange book, flicked through the pages, and pretended he didn't feel them staring. "Oh, look!" he said. "They've finished examining the machine!"

Naga scowled, but when she opened her mouth, Yukiko shook her head. This wasn't the time to figure out their impossible jounin-sensei.

"Everything seems to be honest," the Mist-nin said reluctantly, his hoarse voice rasping as it echoed through his air filter. "I approve the match."

"I approve as well," the Grass-nin said in a firm, musical voice.

"Thank you," Hisen said dryly. "Okay, Shinkan and Aishou. You're on -- get down into the arena and wait for my signal."

\---------------

Aishou vaulted over the balcony railing, while Shinkan simply sat on the edge and dropped down to the arena floor. They were both pale-skinned, dark-haired, and roughly the same height, though Aishou had the stringy look of a boy with several more years of growth ahead of him, while Shinkan seemed to have more or less reached her adult proportions. They both wore the standard grey bodysuit of Hidden Mist, but where Aishou left his unadorned, Shinkan covered hers with a loose, billowing shirt in a mottled pattern. It looked, Yukiko thought, like a green-and-black plaid that had streaked and run in the wash.

Aishou had an air filter dangling around his neck, a canteen slung over his chest and shoulder, a pack of senbon strapped to his right thigh, and a kunai holster on his left leg. Shinkan carried nothing but her sword belt, with her katana on one side and her wakizashi on the other.

"This should be interesting," Kakashi said as he leaned against the railing. "A ninjutsu master who specializes in midrange attacks, against a weapons master who specializes in close combat. The one who controls the range will have the advantage."

Yukiko sank onto a seat behind him and massaged her aching thigh. "Your wisdom is astounding, Kakashi-sensei," she said dryly. Kakashi raised his visible eyebrow, then shrugged and slouched into a seat beside her.

Naga slumped on Yukiko's other side, while Iruka stayed at the railing. "Who do you think will win?" he asked.

Kakashi shrugged again. "You tell me -- if you're right, I'll give you a shiny new lollipop!" His eye crinkled into a teasing crescent.

The three genin exchanged long-suffering glances. "You're already buying us dinner," Naga said. "We don't need extra sweets. Now shut up; they're starting."

Down in the arena, Shinkan and Aishou bowed to each other, and Hisen dropped his hand to start the match. The two teammates circled each other warily, one with drawn blades and one with an open canteen and fingers poised to start a water jutsu. "You made a bet with Junichi," Shinkan said in her loud, clear voice. "I'll make one with you. I don't want to suffer through your cooking, so I say whoever loses this fight does the other's laundry on our way home."

Aishou's face screwed up in disgust. "Shinkan! That's just gross -- I'm not gonna _touch_ your underwear!"

Shinkan laughed. "Then you should fight to win, Aishou... not that you'll succeed." She dashed forward in a blur of grey and steel, and Aishou vanished behind a scalding hot cloud of steam.

Yukiko had a difficult time following the next minute -- Aishou's mist and steam did a very effective job of hiding both him and Shinkan -- but now and then she caught a flash of light off Aishou's canteen, a slash of curved steel as Shinkan struck, or a swift glitter as Aishou hurled senbon at his opponent.

"Why senbon?" Naga asked, looking confused. "He used kunai against Junichi."

"With Junichi, he needed to cut wire. Here, the senbon can strike nerve points to deaden Shinkan's arms, or to increase her temperature sensitivity," Iruka said. "He switches weapons according to his situation."

Huh. The Mist-nin seemed a lot more versatile than the Grass-nin, Yukiko thought. Junichi's wire was effective at close range and middle distance, and Aishou had more than one trick up his sleeve. But Shinkan... why would someone smart -- and her fight with Shiro proved that she was smart -- limit herself to only close combat?

"Ow, _shit!_ "

Down in the arena, Aishou dropped a senbon and hunched over his side. Shinkan rolled out of a thick coil of steam and slammed her foot into his ankle. He stepped back to recover his balance, but she flipped to her feet and kicked the back of his knee.

His leg buckled, and Shinkan shoved him to the ground with her katana at his throat. "Surrender," she said, panting. Her face was red and blistered, and clear fluid seeped from her raw hands, but her blade was steady with the promise of death.

"All right, all right, I give," Aishou muttered. Blood stained his torso and the top of his leg, spreading from whatever had hit his side.

Shinkan looked toward Hisen, who nodded in acknowledgement of her victory. She stepped to the side and shoved her wrist into Aishou's hand, helping him to his feet. Then she slipped her shoulder under his arm for support. Her wakizashi was buried to the hilt just under his ribs.

"She _threw_ her dagger?" Yukiko said in astonishment. "I never heard of people throwing wakizashi."

Kakashi looked at her as if she were a particularly stupid toddler. "It's a weapon. Therefore, it can be thrown, and a sensible ninja would learn to throw it. She can probably throw her katana, too, if necessary."

"Throw a katana?" Naga asked, twitching her shoulder skeptically.

As the two Mist-nin limped out of the arena, Iruka turned sideways against the railing and said, "It takes a lot of practice, but you can learn to do it. It's usually a desperation move -- when you're going to die but a second or two of surprise might give you something to work with." He grinned. "That saved my life in my first chuunin exam. I missed completely, but it distracted my enemy long enough for me to do Kawarimi and run like hell. After that, I spent a few months teaching myself to throw swords properly."

"Hey, hey, you can throw _swords_ , Iruka-san?" a high voice piped up from behind Yukiko. "That's so cool!"

"Naruto!" Yukiko spun around, ignoring the protest of her slashed side, and grinned at the kid. "What new origami did Taizen-san teach you?"

"These!" Naruto's blue eyes gleamed as a grin split his face. He held up a double handful of folded orange paper, slightly askew at the corners and bent where clumsy, childish fingers couldn't quite master the delicacy needed to keep the paper crisp and straight, but clearly recognizable as a tulip, a crane, a butterfly, a dog, a crow, a dolphin, several frogs, a snowflake... and a fox.

Yukiko blinked at the kid's choice of subject matter, and sent Taizen a questioning glance. "I showed him the flower, crane, butterfly, and frog patterns, but he asked about the others on his own," Taizen said quietly. "Even the fox."

Huh. How much of the Kyuubi leaked through the seal? Not enough to make Naruto dangerous -- Yukiko was sure of that by now -- and not enough to influence his conscious mind... but foxes were notorious tricksters, and that might explain some of Naruto's passion for jokes. Still, that was a question for another day. "Are these presents, kid?" Yukiko asked, fishing out the crow and the dolphin.

Naruto nodded. "Yeah! Those're for Naga and Iruka-san, 'cause Naga can make crows and 'cause of Iruka-san's name, and the dog's for Kakashi-baka 'cause he's like Gouchou-san's lazy old dog on the third floor, and the snowflake's for you. You're cooler than a snowflake, Yukiko-neechan, but it's your name, and Taizen-san says it's pretty and you'll like it. Do you?"

"Yeah," Yukiko said as she held the garish orange snowflake in her cupped hands. "Yeah, kid, I like it a lot."

\---------------

Hisen's voice cut through Yukiko's contemplation, drawing her attention back to the chuunin exam. "Next match is... Tonoike Naga vs. Nagoyaka Kafunnokaze!"

Naga blinked. "Fuck."

"Naga-chan, watch your language," Taizen said, a sharp edge threading through her voice. "Naruto-kun doesn't need to hear that sort of thing."

" _Fine_ ," Naga growled, glaring at her mother. "Yell at me before I go and get poisoned to death. _I_ don't mind having this as our last conversation if _you_ don't."

In the corner of her eye, Yukiko noticed Iruka and Kakashi both wince -- Kakashi covered better, but there was no way that twitch at the corner of his eye didn't mean something. "You're not going to die," she told Naga firmly. Then she leaned over and hissed into the girl's ear. "Iruka and Naruto are both orphans, you idiot. Say something nice to your mother."

Naga maintained her scowl, but she closed her eyes for a second and said, "Sorry, Mother. Thank you for coming to watch today."

Taizen's cool expression softened, and she rested her hand on Naga's shoulder. "I apologize for my tone, Naga-chan. Now, get down into the arena and uphold the honor of our village and our clan."

Naga twitched her shoulder, casting off her mother's hand, but a tiny smile hovered on her lips as she vaulted over the balcony railing. Kafunnokaze, meanwhile, walked out of the doorway at the base of the wall; he'd taken the stairs.

Yukiko looked at Iruka. "You realize this means we have to fight each other next," she said.

Iruka scratched the base of his ponytail. "Um, yes. But let's not worry about that yet. I hope Naga comes through her match without too much damage."

"Hey, hey, don't you think Naga's gonna win?" Naruto asked as he swung his heels against the legs of his seat. "She's annoying, but she's kind of cool. And she can stick out her tongue all the way across the room!"

Yukiko shrugged. "Naga's a good fighter, kid, but she doesn't have any defense against drugs and poisons. This could be hard for her."

"Oh." Naruto looked subdued for all of three seconds before he perked up again. "But she can hit really hard! Hey, hey, I bet she kicks that guy's butt."

"I'll take that bet," Kakashi said as he slouched in his seat. "If I win, I get to dye _your_ hair, you little brat."

"Nyah!" Naruto stuck his tongue out and grinned. Yukiko pressed a hand against her head and, very softly, groaned. She was surrounded by idiots. Naruto had a right to be immature, but by all the kami, Kakashi was _her_ age. And he was a jounin! It was extremely disconcerting when he acted like a three-year-old kid.

"Ready?" Hisen's voice drew Yukiko's attention down into the arena, where Naga and Kafunnokaze faced each other, tense and poised for action. Kafunnokaze's gloved hand was inside his coat, and Yukiko winced at the thought of the drugs he might be reaching for. "Begin!"

Naga charged. Kafunnokaze whirled and sprinted for the far side of the arena, scattering the contents of a paper packet as he ran. Naga cut sideways to dodge the windborne drug, but she was still faster than he was. She caught up, and for a second Yukiko thought she was going to throw a punch -- but she thrust off the ground into a flying kick instead.

"He poisons his coat," Kakashi said to Yukiko and Iruka's confused expressions. "She doesn't want to touch him with bare skin."

Huh. "Well, I feel stupid," Yukiko said. _She_ was supposed to be better at strategy, but Naga had remembered the contact poison and she hadn't. Some chuunin _she'd_ make.

Kafunnokaze stumbled as Naga's feet hit his back, but he tucked smoothly into a shoulder roll and spun to face her. As her sandaled foot crashed into his jaw, he threw a powder point-blank into her face.

Naga slapped her hand over her mouth and nose and dropped to the ground, rolling away. Her other hand splashed into a shallow puddle condensed from Aishou's mists, and she extended her neck to shove her face into the muddy water, trying to wash away Kafunnokaze's drug.

Kafunnokaze staggered to his feet, looking dazed and unbalanced from Naga's kick. He drew a kunai that glistened oddly -- probably poisoned -- and threw it at Naga's unguarded back. She scrambled aside just before it could hit her, and the knife sank harmlessly into the dirt.

They faced each other for a few seconds, both dizzy and out of breath. Then Naga tore the wrapping from her left arm and started winding it around her face. Kafunnokaze cursed and ran.

Naga tied her makeshift mask and chased him.

As she closed, she tried another kick, but Kafunnokaze dropped to the ground and froze. Naga flew harmlessly over his body, and he reached up and stabbed her calf with a kunai.

"Oh, _shit_ ," Yukiko said.

"Language, please," Taizen murmured. Her voice was calm, but her body seemed to thrum with tension. "He was kind to the Aburame girl. I'm sure he won't kill my daughter."

Yukiko glanced at the deep, red furrows Taizen's fingernails had left in her skin as she clenched her folded hands, but said nothing.

Kafunnokaze shot to his feet and ran again, still wavering a bit from the hit to his jaw. Naga yanked his kunai from her leg and hurled it after him, but it caught in his long coat without touching his body. Then she looked down at her bleeding calf, and cursed. She tore the bandage off her right arm and tied it above the wound in a sort of makeshift tourniquet, but some of the drug or poison had obviously started working through her blood and she staggered, one hand flying to her chest.

Kafunnokaze, on the far side of the arena, smiled in relief.

Naga scowled, and dashed toward him. Even drugged, she was still faster than he was, and this time, she didn't bother trying for a kick -- she just punched him, hard, in his lower back, and swept his legs from under him as he stumbled. He threw a handful of powder behind him as he fell, but Naga didn't even try to evade it. She slammed a knife-hand against the side of his neck as she collapsed to the ground.

She struggled to raise herself again, and then fell limp and unconscious, one hand clutching her chest.

Kafunnokaze twitched, moaned, and tried to get up. He managed to push himself to his hands and knees, and then slowly rose to his feet. He wavered, one hand pressed tightly against the side of his head, and nearly fell, but Hisen appeared at his side and lent him a hand in support.

"You win -- congratulations. Do you have antidotes?" Hisen asked calmly, as three medic-nin hurried out with a stretcher and lifted Naga from the ground.

"Yeah," Kafunnokaze said. His voice was thick and slow, and he blinked rapidly as if trying to clear something from his eyes. "Yeah, I have antidotes. Here." He took his hand from his head and reached into his coat for a green paper packet and a vial of yellow liquid, which he handed to one of the medic-nin. "Mix the packet into a half liter of water, and give her about three swallows. Then rub the yellow gunk over the cut on her leg. Some aspirin would probably be good too."

He lifted his hand to his jaw, where Naga had kicked him at the start of their fight, and blinked again. "Wow, she kicks hard."

Hisen smiled and led him out of the arena.


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter the Fifteenth, in which Yukiko flummoxes everyone, Shinkan has something up her sleeve, Iruka plays with fire, Naruto is actually quiet (briefly), Naga does not actually appear, and Kakashi continues to annoy the heck out of people.

Taizen stood as the medic-nin carried Naga through a door in the arena wall. "I wish good luck to both of you, Iruka-kun and Yukiko-san," she said quickly, "but I can't stay to watch your fight. I must be with my daughter." She tucked her hands into the wide sleeves of her lavender kimono, bowed, and swept out of the reserved section of the balcony. Her light steps were graceful but hurried.

Yukiko turned and looked speculatively at Iruka. She wasn't looking forward to fighting him, and he didn't seem enthusiastic about the match either. "I guess we should get down there," she said.

"Um. Yes."

Yukiko stood, winced slightly as her wounded thigh protested the movement, and started walking toward the stairs. Iruka fell in beside her.

"Hey, hey, Yukiko-neechan?" Naruto scrambled after her and tugged on her jacket; Yukiko stopped instantly and looked down at him. His round face was screwed up in a frown of deep concern, and his blue eyes were wide and worried. "If you're fighting Iruka-san, does that mean only one of you gets to be a chuunin?"

Yukiko knelt and laid her hand on his shoulder. "No, kid -- we can both pass the test and become chuunin. It doesn't matter which one of us wins, so long as we both show that we're smart and can fight well."

"Oh." Naruto relaxed, and grinned. "That's good. 'Cause I'm gonna cheer for you, but Iruka-san's my friend and it wouldn't be fair if you get to be a chuunin and he doesn't."

Yukiko ruffled his hair; he ducked out from under her hand with an air of wounded pride. "Kid, you're great, you know that? Don't ever change." It was amazing that Naruto cared about being fair after the way people like Tani Midori, his old guardian, had treated him. Yukiko didn't think she'd have half his faith in humanity, or his courage and resilience, if she were in his situation.

She couldn't do anything drastic to Iruka while Naruto was watching. She really hoped Iruka shared that feeling in reverse.

"Do you have any final advice, Kakashi-sensei?" Iruka asked as Yukiko stood again.

Kakashi shrugged and closed his eye. "Look underneath the underneath. Remember that you're teammates. And don't be idiots -- that's what most advice boils down to anyway."

Yukiko and Iruka sighed in unison. "Right," Yukiko said. "Bye, kid. Don't do anything _too_ drastic to Kakashi-san while I'm gone." Naruto's slow grin and Kakashi's sudden alarm warmed her as she started down the stairs.

\---------------

Yukiko hesitated at the doorway to the arena floor, trying to think of a strategy for fighting Iruka. She'd made tentative plans for facing the Mist-nin, the Grass-nin, and Naga's classmates, but she hadn't really considered what to do if she ended up facing Iruka or Naga. She hadn't _wanted_ to consider that.

Naga would have been easy; she still had trouble breaking full genjutsu traps, and something simple would probably hold her long enough for Yukiko to knock her out. Iruka, though... She knew so many more of his old wounds to play on now, so many more of his insecurities. She could freeze him with guilt, torture him with self-doubt, wrack him with psychosomatic pain -- all the horrors she'd refrained from unleashing in her demonstration of skills, nearly two months ago. Genjutsu that deep and strong would drink her chakra like a desert drank water, but it would probably work. She could win.

But Iruka was her teammate. A ninja who turned on her teammate was lower than scum. And Naruto was watching.

Yukiko walked slowly to the center of the arena, trying to think of a way out. She really had no defense other than genjutsu. Her usable offense consisted of smoke bombs, flash bombs, explosive notes, kunai, and her uncertain aim. She couldn't drag Iruka's dead parents up in his mind -- bloody, broken, and putrefying -- to accuse and torment him. She couldn't parade illusions of Naruto, Naga, and herself before his eyes -- illusions tortured and murdered because of Iruka's imaginary failures. She couldn't make herself do that.

Even if she could, Iruka deserved to win more than she did. He would be a good teacher, the kind of teacher who cared about his students and taught them more than just rote lessons. He could teach kids compassion and understanding. He could teach them to be good people as well as good ninja. He'd do a lot of good as a chuunin.

What good would _she_ do? She'd be stuck leading missions, always out of town and snatching a day here or a week there to stay home and relax. She'd have to turn her building over to Yusuke.

She'd have to leave Naruto alone.

Yukiko closed her eyes and saw the kid curled up on her bed in her darkened room, moonlight splashing over his pale face, and hands clutching her jacket for comfort. She heard his voice, saying with complete disbelief, _"There are people who'd_ want _to help me?"_ She felt his arms hugging her like he was afraid she might turn to smoke and vanish if he didn't hold on as tightly as he could.

If being a chuunin meant losing her new family, then screw the exam.

Yes, she liked being a ninja, and she was proud of her skills -- she could admit that now -- but that didn't define her life. Naruto's voice echoed in her mind, high and determined, saying, _"Wasn't being a ninja your dream?"_ and then, _"I'm never gonna give up, not like you!"_

"Dreams change, kid," Yukiko murmured as she opened her eyes and stepped away from Iruka, letting Hisen's voice wash over her ears like the meaningless babble of a stream. "Sometimes you don't give up -- you just find something more important."

"Begin!" Hisen dropped his hand and leaped for the walls. Iruka drew his kodachi and circled warily; Yukiko could feel him straining his senses, wondering if she'd already caught him in an illusion.

One last test, Yukiko thought, just to make sure this was what they both wanted. She drew a handful of flash bombs from the left pocket of her jacket and tossed them in a wide arc between herself and Iruka. Then she closed her eyes and wove her fingers through four seals. "Heart's Desire no Jutsu," she whispered, and opened her eyes.

Iruka blinked, and stood frozen as he stared at his parents and Sadako. They smiled and ducked out of sight again, as he turned back to his eager, fidgeting class. In the back of the room, Naruto grinned.

Yukiko drew a kunai and walked forward, concentrating as she whispered comfort and calm into Iruka's mind. In one part of her awareness, she watched his illusory world. In another, she saw a ghostly image of her own parents waiting at the door of her building. Her mother's sky blue hair was pulled into a high cascade, and a brilliant smile lit her father's broad face. Ame and Kasumi stood off to the side; Ame idly flipped her giant shuriken open and closed, while Kasumi leaned on her spear with half-closed eyes. Yukiko's cousins walked past on the left, and Uncle Yutaro nodded to her, his face for once empty of disapproval.

Naruto stood between her parents, clutching her mother's hand, bouncing on his toes, and beaming like a tiny piece of the sun come down to earth.

"It's a beautiful dream, Yukiko. Thank you," Iruka said. In the genjutsu classroom, he brought his hands together in the dispelling seal, and stilled the chakra flows she was manipulating. "Kai."

She threw her kunai. One kodachi flashed out and deflected the knife; it spun harmlessly to the side. Iruka raised his other sword and set his feet for an attack.

Yukiko lifted her empty hands. "I forfeit."

\---------------

There was a moment of confused silence in the arena, and then murmurs swept through the audience. Hisen appeared at Yukiko's side with raised eyebrows. "Forfeit?" he asked.

"Yes," Yukiko said clearly. "Iruka is my teammate, and his reasons for wanting to be a chuunin are more important than mine. I could fight him, but I won't use dark genjutsu on my friend, not when he isn't a danger to Konoha."

Iruka lowered his kodachi. "Yukiko, you don't have to do this. You've waited a lot longer for this than I have. I can try again next year."

Yukiko shook her head. "Don't bother, Iruka. You want to be a teacher a lot more than I want to be a run of the mill chuunin, and Konoha needs good teachers a lot more than it needs another illusionist." She turned to Hisen and said, "I forfeit. Iruka wins." Then she started back toward the stairs.

Hisen laid a hand on Iruka's shoulder when he tried to follow her. "Since you're not injured, you'll be in the next match. You might as well wait here while I decide who you'll face." Then he teleported out of the arena, presumably heading for the room where medic-nin were treating Shinkan and Kafunnokaze.

Iruka hesitated, and then hurried after Yukiko. He caught up to her as she opened the doorway to the staircase -- her thigh still ached, so she hadn't walked particularly fast. "Why?" he asked, speaking quietly and facing into the stairwell. That kept his voice from activating the arena's acoustic seals, carefully designed to carry voices anywhere from the center to the farthest seats, so that everyone could hear taunts exchanged during fights, and match jutsu names to their results.

Yukiko shrugged. "Before the first test, I told my uncle that I wasn't sure I wanted to be an active ninja, but I did want to prove that if I quit, I quit because I chose to, not because I wasn't good enough. I think I proved that."

She stopped fighting the smile that wanted to stretch out across her face. She'd helped her team through the first test. She'd beaten the 'assassin' in the gorge, all by herself. She'd used genjutsu against an Uchiha and won. Yes, she'd made her point -- Uncle Yutaro probably wouldn't recognize that she'd won their argument, but Yukiko knew, and that was what really mattered.

"Well, yes, but why choose to quit?" Iruka asked, looking puzzled. "You like being a shinobi -- I know you do -- and Naruto looks up to you."

" _Because_ Naruto looks up to me," Yukiko said. "Think about it. I'm his big sister now. How would he feel if I passed the exam, and had to spend weeks away on missions? What if I left and never came home? What if I died?" She reached over and tapped Iruka's chest. " _You_ need to be a ninja to reach your dream. I don't. Besides," she added, "I like running an apartment building. It's not what I planned to do with my life, but I'd miss it if I had to stop."

That was actually true; she'd never expected to like taking over her parents' job, but somewhere along the line she'd realized that she was good at it. She could make a large building run smoothly, keep her tenants happy, develop good relations with other business people in Konoha -- and she'd miss doing that at least as much as she'd missed being an active ninja.

She was lucky. She had two ways to make a living; she could afford to pick the one that let her have a family.

Iruka flushed and rubbed his scar. "I think you're underestimating yourself, but it's your choice. Good luck explaining all that to Naruto."

Yukiko groaned and slapped her forehead. Then she shook out her fingers and blew on the tingling spots where her knuckles had cracked against the metal plate of her forehead protector. "Right, thanks; I'll need some luck. Speaking of which, good luck to you in your next fight. Shinkan and Kafunnokaze are both strong, and they're smart."

"I know," Iruka said. He paused, scratched the base of his ponytail, and shifted his feet awkwardly. "Um. Will you give me your explosive notes, since you aren't fighting again?"

"Sure. Strings or adhesive?"

"Strings."

Yukiko fished a bundle of explosive notes from the front pocket of her pants. They were the kind that looked like cheap and flimsy luggage tags, with a scribbled seal on the back and a bit of string tied through a small hole at one end. Then she looked at Iruka's outfit, noted his lack of pockets, and paused. "Where will you put them?"

Iruka flushed a brilliant tomato red, snatched the tags from her hand, and tucked them into the waistband of his trousers. His eyes dared her to comment.

"You're lucky I'm not Naga or Kakashi," Yukiko said with a mischievous grin. "Break their legs and kick their butts, Iruka. Naruto and I will be cheering for you."

"Thanks, Yukiko. Um. And I think you'd be a great chuunin, even if you'd rather stay with Naruto and your building." Iruka smiled, and Yukiko wished for half a second that he were her age instead of a teenager. Then she smiled back, wryly, and slipped through the door.

Naruto was waiting at the top of the stairs, utter confusion on his face. "Hey, hey, are you okay, Yukiko-neechan?" he asked. "Why'd you give up? Iruka-san's cool, but you could've won! And you said you weren't gonna give up anymore!"

This was her little brother, and he believed in her. Yukiko let that thought warm her, and then she bent down and swept him into a hug; after a second of token struggle, he relaxed and let her carry him. "I didn't give up, kid. I just realized that I had more than one dream, and I picked the one I cared about more."

"You have another dream? What's that?" Naruto asked.

Yukiko dropped into a seat beside Kakashi and set Naruto down beside her. "...Family, kid. That's my other dream. I didn't want to hurt Iruka, and I don't want to leave you alone. So I forfeited. Besides," she added, "I didn't really give up. I've already proved that I _could_ be a ninja if I wanted to. Right, Kakashi-san?"

Kakashi glanced up from his little orange book and shrugged. "You could be a decent shinobi. You three might even have passed my old sensei's evaluation after you graduated from the academy, and that's not something just anyone can do."

"See, kid?"

Naruto squirmed on his seat, face set in an expression of deep concentration. "So, so, you think _I'm_ more important than being a ninja?" he asked after a minute.

"Yeah," Yukiko said softly. "Yeah, I do."

Silently, Naruto reached out and clutched her hand. Yukiko lifted him onto her lap and held him like he was the most precious thing in the world.

\---------------

After another two minutes, during which Iruka paced the arena floor, waves of noise rose and fell as the audience shifted and murmured, and Kakashi, Yukiko, and Naruto sat in companionable silence, Hisen appeared on the balcony and tapped a few buttons on the control panel.

"It's my decision, backed by the medic-nin, that Nagoyaka Kafunnokaze is more injured than Shinkan. Therefore, Shinkan will now face Umino Iruka in the semifinal match," he said in a loud voice as the two names in question flashed up on the announcement boards.

"Shinkan had burns and open blisters all over her hands," Yukiko said to Kakashi. "How is that less serious than a concussion?"

"We have salves and chakra techniques for fixing burns, and at the least they can be wrapped for protection. We still can't do much for concussions besides hand out painkillers and wait," Kakashi said. He snapped his book shut, tucked it into a pocket of his vest, and peered down into the arena.

Shinkan strode out from a ground-level door and headed for Iruka and Hisen's waiting figures. Her face was still red, but the color seemed more like a faint and fading sunburn than the vivid, parboiled look Aishou had left her with. Her hands were sheathed in soft white gloves, which were further secured with surgical tape; the bandages ran up her arms and under the loose sleeves of her muddy shirt. The hilts of her katana and kodachi gleamed oddly, as if she'd rubbed them with something to counter the slipperiness of her new gloves.

"Iruka-san's gonna win, right?" Naruto asked, tipping his head backwards to see Yukiko's face.

She shrugged. "I don't know, kid. He's good, and his kunai and shuriken give him an advantage at middle distance, but she's awfully fast. If Iruka can get off any fire jutsu, that might help, but Shinkan might have some ninjutsu up her sleeve as well."

"Oh. Well, I bet he wins," Naruto said firmly. "And then I'm gonna steal Kakashi-baka's stupid books and paint all over them, even if they _are_ orange."

"It's good to set your goals high, brat," Kakashi said as he shifted a few inches away from Naruto's hands. "You won't ever reach them, but they make you try harder."

Naruto stuck his tongue out at Kakashi, and Yukiko -- after checking to make sure the kid was looking straight ahead and couldn't see her face -- copied him. Kakashi sighed, and she grinned at him.

Iruka and Shinkan bowed to each other, hands hovering near the hilts of their weapons; they each recognized a dangerous and intelligent opponent. Hisen dropped his hand. "Begin!"

A thick shroud of mist billowed out over the arena floor, filling nearly half the space between the high concrete walls.

Yukiko blinked. "I guess Shinkan does know some ninjutsu." Then a nasty thought struck her. "Mouten Junichi is her teammate, and he fights with his eyes closed. That would give him an advantage in the dark. She and Aishou must have a lot of practice at blind fighting."

"Mmm," agreed Kakashi, as he pushed his forehead-protector up to reveal his left eye and the old scar that bisected it. Three black commas whirled around his pupil, like specks of night in the blood-red iris of the Sharingan.

A muffled clash of metal rose from the concealing mist.

"Can you see what's going on?" Yukiko asked.

Kakashi walked to the railing, closed his right eye, and squinted down into the shifting grey cloud. "A bit. Samurai girl is keeping her mist jutsu active, and she's prowling around Iruka. She's more than fast enough to slip past his defenses when he can't see to block her. I think she's going for his arms -- disabling strikes."

"So, so, what's Iruka-san doing?" Naruto asked, wriggling impatiently on Yukiko's lap. "Mist stinks -- I want to see!"

"Running," Kakashi said blandly. "See?" He pointed at the edge of the mist, just as Iruka burst into the open with a diving roll. He bounced to his feet and took three steps backward, toward the wall.

"A classic standoff," Kakashi said. "She can't leave the mist, he can't enter, and neither can reach the other right now. I wonder what other tricks samurai girl has up her sleeve?"

Iruka sheathed his kodachi and fished several explosive notes out from his waistband. Then he tied them to the hilts of his kunai. Yukiko grinned. "I guess he listened to that advice you gave me a few weeks ago," she said to Kakashi.

"Very possibly," he said, not paying particular attention to her. He propped his chin on his hand and stared into the mist. "Oh, now this is interesting. She's... hmm... I think samurai girl is trying a genjutsu, but I can't tell what it's meant to do." His forehead drew downward in a frown of concentration, and the Sharingan spun faster. "I think it interacts with the mist... yes. It shapes images out of the mist, and probably also lets her throw her voice to any of the illusions."

Yukiko frowned. Huh. Once genjutsu started interacting with ninjutsu, it could be very hard to dispel through normal means, since it wasn't all in your head anymore. She couldn't pull off jutsu like that -- she couldn't create mist or smoke to manipulate -- but she knew the theory behind that type of illusion. "That's not good," she said. "Even if Iruka can throw his explosive tags, he'll probably end up aiming at clones instead of Shinkan."

Sure enough, when an image of Shinkan cautiously peered out of the fog, several yards away from Iruka, he hurled a tagged kunai toward her. The illusion tucked and rolled back into its cover, and the explosion spattered dirt in a harmless circle. Its heat drove the mist back for a second, but then the cloud swept back and consumed the dry smoke.

The mist surged a few feet toward Iruka, and another image stuck its head out. "You missed," it said with Shinkan's clear voice.

This time Iruka threw two kunai, one to either side of the illusion, but again he hit nothing but dirt and fog. After several seconds, the mist swept over the ragged gaps near its edge and reformed into the same impenetrable grey wall.

"What does he think he's doing?" Yukiko wondered. "Shinkan can't hold the mist forever, but he'll run out of explosive notes and kunai a long time before she'll run out of chakra."

"He's a strategist," Kakashi said, still peering into the mist. "He's testing a plan."

Yukiko waited for several seconds, and then said, "Well? What plan?"

Kakashi turned his head and favored her with a lazy wink. "Patience is a virtue for shinobi and civilians alike, Yukiko. If you practice it well enough, you might even be able to knock that into Naruto's skull."

Yukiko slapped her hand over Naruto's mouth, counted -- very fast -- to ten, and whispered into the kid's ear, "If you want to spill something on Kakashi-san's book during dinner tonight, I promise not to yell at you for disturbing Taizen-san's teahouse. Actually, I'll help you. I bet if we all work together, the way we did to dye his hair, we can pull that off. Nod if you agree."

Naruto bobbed his head furiously, and Yukiko pulled her hand away from his mouth. "You're cool, Yukiko-neechan," he said. "This is gonna be so funny! Hehehehe."

Kakashi stared suspiciously at them, but before he could make a comment, Iruka drew a handful of kunai and sprinted into the fog. Yukiko held her breath, hoping he wasn't crazy or trying a kamikaze move, and then flung her hand up to shade her eyes as fire blazed in the arena. Explosions scattered through Shinkan's mist, and a gout of flame billowed outward in a ring from where Iruka stood.

This time the mist didn't heal. Severed into ragged patches, cut off from its source in Shinkan's chakra, it began to dissipate into the hot afternoon air.

Iruka stood in a bare patch several yards in diameter; his hands were already snapping down from guiding the flames, snatching his last four kunai from his holster. At the far edge of his circle, Shinkan lowered her arms from their instinctive -- and useless -- guard in front of her face, and cursed.

She dove for the safety of her remaining mist, fingers already shaping seals, but in the second she took to react, Iruka threw his kunai. Two sank into her side and one sliced a glancing wound across her leg. Now the tattered mists began to gather, trying to smother Iruka and protect their mistress. Iruka took a deep breath, stepped into the thickening grey cloud, and set off the fire jutsu again.

Shinkan dove out from the fog, rolled under Iruka's flames and slashed at his legs with her katana. Yukiko winced, but Iruka leapt over the sword, tucked into an aerial roll, and landed with his kodachi drawn. He was bleeding from slices on his arms and shoulders, courtesy of Shinkan before he'd escaped her mist, but the cuts were shallow. Shinkan had a few similar wounds, but now she was favoring her right side, where his kunai had bitten deep, and her face was once again red and blistered.

"Iruka-san," Naruto said, in the tones of the deeply impressed, "is _cool_."

"Yeah, kid, I think he is," Yukiko agreed. "That was a pretty good plan." After getting scalded by Aishou, Shinkan was instinctively flinching from heat, and her hesitation had bought Iruka just enough time to strike. They seemed to be done with ninjutsu for the moment, and had moved on to close combat. All things being equal, they were probably an even match with their weapons -- Shinkan was faster but Iruka's kodachi were better for defense, while the length of her sword compensated for the length of his arms -- but now she was wounded, and that gave the advantage to him.

"Plan? That's not the point, Yukiko-neechan! He can make _fire_ ," Naruto clarified.

Ah, the logic of six-year-olds. Yukiko shook her head in amusement as Iruka slowly wore Shinkan down. "There's more to life than explosions, kid," she said. "Besides, plans are cool too. You should know that -- you make plans whenever you set traps and jokes."

"Yeah, yeah, but that's different. That's just stuff. When I go to the academy, I'm gonna learn about chakra, and I'm gonna make all sorts of 'splosions!"

"Konoha trembles in fear, brat," Kakashi said dryly. "Oh, look, samurai girl's knocked out. Iruka won. Shall we cheer now?"

"Yeah!" Naruto said, climbing off Yukiko's lap to stand upright on the seat beside her. "Yay Iruka-san! You kicked her butt! You're cool, and you're gonna be a chuunin, and we're gonna get dinner, and you're gonna be my teacher, and you're my friend, and I'm really happy you won!" He waved his hands wildly and grinned like a maniac.

Yukiko stifled a burst of laughter. Then she made the mistake of looking at Kakashi's raised eyebrow and had to bite her tongue, very firmly, to keep from collapsing in giggles and making Naruto think she didn't approve of his loud support for Iruka.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Omake:** Naruto squirmed on his seat, face set in an expression of deep concentration. "So, so, you think _I'm_ more important than being a ninja?" he asked after a minute.
> 
> "Yeah," Yukiko said softly. "Yeah, I do."
> 
> Naruto stared at her in disbelief. "That's so stupid! You're not my big sister anymore, not if you don't think being a ninja is the coolest thing ever!" He stuck out his tongue and then turned his back on her.
> 
> "Well, shit." Yukiko tapped Hisen on the shoulder. "Hey, can I call a do-over?"


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter the Sixteenth, in which Iruka proves that he's better at tactics than Naga, Taizen loses her cool, a bit of political wrangling occurs offstage, Naga tests her boundaries, Naruto gets his way, and Yukiko gets a shock.

Once again, Iruka was left down in the arena to wait for the medic-nin to release his opponent. He promptly sat down to conserve his strength, unwound the white cloth from his left wrist, and began to bandage the shallow cuts on his arms. Hisen assured the audience that Kafunnokaze would be out shortly, leapt to the genin's balcony to make Iruka and Kafunnokaze's names flash on the announcement boards, and then pushed open a door leading down to the inner rooms of the arena complex.

In the doorway, Taizen blinked in the sudden light, her arm still outstretched to pull on the door handle. "Please excuse me," she murmured, and stepped aside to let Hisen pass. Then she held the door while Naga limped through, leaning heavily on a padded crutch.

"Hey, hey, Naga! You're okay! You missed Iruka-san's fight -- it was really cool, and he can make _huge_ 'splosions, almost as big as a tree," Naruto called as Naga walked, slowly and deliberately, along the balcony toward her team. Taizen hovered beside her daughter, ready to catch her if she faltered.

Naga favored Naruto with her small, cockeyed smile. "What kind of tree?" she asked as she lowered herself onto a seat. "Wide like a cherry, or straight up like an oak?"

" _Both_ ," Naruto said, with the withering scorn he usually reserved for people who tried to convince him that other foods tasted better than ramen. Yukiko rested her chin on his head and grinned at Naga; in the corner of her eye, she saw Kakashi wave lazily and twist so his back was against the balcony railing and he could watch the conversation.

"Sounds like a big explosion," Naga agreed. She swung her bandaged leg up onto the seat between herself and Yukiko, and sighed with relief. A faint greenish tinge lingered under her skin, but her breathing sounded normal and her chest didn't seem to be bothering her anymore.

"I take it Kafunnokaze's antidotes worked," Yukiko remarked. "Was he actually using deadly poisons, or just incapacitants?"

Naga twitched her shoulder. "Coat's deadly if you rub your hands all over it, but I didn't touch it that much. Everything else would've worn off on its own. The antidotes just kept me from twelve hours of fever dreams and puking my guts out when I woke up." She smiled again. "He's not bad -- gave me a chocolate bar while the medic-nin wrapped my leg."

Taizen made a small disapproving noise in the back of her throat. "Generous or not, he is still a Grass-nin."

Naga stared sourly at her mother. "So Hidden Grass got scared of bloodline limits and kicked out our clan. So what? _I_ don't care, and I bet Kafunnokaze doesn't either. It's not like he asked me to marry him."

Taizen's face smoothed until she had no readable expression at all -- which, for a ninja (or even a former ninja), was generally a sign of strong emotions. Yukiko had the distinct feeling that she'd stumbled into an old family argument, one whose positions had been fought over until both Naga and her mother knew them inside and out, and one that Yukiko had no business listening to. She cast about for a change of topic. "He's a strong ninja," she said somewhat desperately. "How do you think Iruka will do against him?"

"Depends," Naga said, turning away from her mother. "If he wraps his face at the start, that'll help. And he has swords, so he doesn't have to worry about keeping his hands off the coat. But Kafunnokaze's smart and he has good aim. And he told me some of his powders are for the eyes, not the nose or mouth."

"Huh. That sounds tricky," Yukiko said, "and Iruka used up all his kunai on Shinkan. I don't know how many shuriken he has left."

"Who cares?" Naruto said with a grin. He bounced on Yukiko's lap and kicked his heels against her shins. "Iruka-san can make fire and blow up the guy in the coat!"

"Kid, you can't solve everything with fire jutsu," Yukiko said.

Naruto twisted his head around and pouted. "You're just jealous 'cause you can't make fire too, Yukiko-neechan."

Oh, this was ridiculous. "Kid, I don't _need_ ninjutsu to make fire. If I want to fight, I can convince you that you're burning to death. If I need to relight the stove, I have matches. And if everything else fails, I have steel and a piece of flint to strike sparks. So there." Yukiko bent down and stuck her tongue out in Naruto's face.

He pulled down his lower eyelids with his index fingers, stuck his pinkies up his nose, and grinned at her.

"Okay, okay, you win!" Yukiko said, trying not to laugh. "Now stop that. It's disgusting, and we're in public."

Naruto wiped his hands on his orange jacket and looked smug.

"Yo." Yukiko turned at Kakashi's voice; the jounin was pointing down into the arena. "I apologize for interrupting this moment of domestic tranquility, but it occurred to me that you might want to watch the last fight."

"Yeah, thanks," Yukiko said. Then she raised her voice and called, "Good luck, Iruka! You can beat him!" Iruka glanced upward, waved at the balcony -- Naruto waved back frantically with both hands -- and then returned to watching Kafunnokaze's slow progress to the center of the arena.

\---------------

Kafunnokaze looked unharmed -- unlike Shinkan, he had no bandages to show for his injuries -- but the careful way he placed his feet shouted that his balance wasn't completely certain, and his vision might be a trifle blurred. Still, he'd spent the past fifteen minutes resting while Iruka had been running, bleeding, and burning chakra. Neither one was in the best shape for a fight.

Iruka was taller, but not by much; however, he looked much better proportioned, whereas Kafunnokaze had the stretched look of a boy who'd just finished a growth spurt. Yukiko figured that was one reason Kafunnokaze had barely tried any close combat in his previous fights. He probably wasn't sure of his reach and hadn't ingrained his new height into his reflexes.

Kafunnokaze pulled his black cloth mask up from his collar and settled it across his mouth and nose. Iruka frowned, and then stripped the wrapping from his other wrist and wound it several times around his lower face.

"You learn fast," Kafunnokaze said cheerfully. "This is going to be interesting."

"Thank you," Iruka said. His hand hovered near his leg, ready to draw shuriken.

Hisen popped down into the arena, glanced between the two ninja, and raised his arm. "Do you wish to forfeit?" Both boys shook their heads. "Okay. Begin!"

Kafunnokaze tore open a packet and cast a wind jutsu. Iruka was already running, circling to the right, but the wind howled after him, carrying its rust-colored poison; it swirled around him in a tight spiral, sucking dust from the ground to obscure Iruka from sight. Yukiko held her breath.

Suddenly, Iruka's swords pierced the whirlwind. One kodachi sliced down while the other slashed up, both glowing red hot with a fire jutsu Kakashi had drilled Iruka into combining with his weapons kata. The heat broke the wind's spiral, just as Kafunnokaze approached with a poisoned kunai in one hand and an open packet in the other.

Iruka coughed, dropped his kodachi, and blew flames point-blank into Kafunnokaze's chest.

The Grass-nin's heavy black coat sizzled and caught fire. Paper packets burned and exploded, sending gouts of discolored smoke into Kafunnokaze's face. He tore his arms from his sleeves and threw the coat onto Iruka. Iruka shook it off, dropped, grabbed his kodachi, and rolled to the side. Kafunnokaze followed, kicking dirt toward his smoking coat.

Now both shinobi were breathing heavily and swaying from the burning drugs that had seeped through their cloth masks. Kafunnokaze drew a long dagger from his back and a handful of kunai in his left hand, and waited. Iruka set his swords, took a deep breath, and charged.

Yukiko's hands tightened around Naruto, and the kid squeezed her arms. Iruka was skilled with his kodachi, but Kafunnokaze's blades glistened with the oily sheen of poison, and she'd seen what his concoctions had done to Naga.

Kafunnokaze managed one slice across Iruka's thigh and another on his left wrist, before Iruka twisted the dagger from his hand and kicked his knee. His balance was already shaky, and he crashed to the ground. Iruka pressed one kodachi against his neck and pointed the tip of the other at the small of his back. "Yield?"

"Yeah, I yield," Kafunnokaze said. Then he groaned and rolled onto his back. "Oh, kami, my head hurts."

"Sorry," Iruka said as he sheathed his swords. "Do you want a hand up?" Kafunnokaze held up his arms and Iruka hauled the Grass-nin, stumbling, to his feet.

Hisen appeared in front of them and offered both boys a shoulder to lean on. "Congratulations!" he said with a slight smile. "Umino Iruka, you're hereby declared the winner of this tournament, and Nagoyaka Kafunnokaze, you're the runner-up. Everyone else, please take an intermission while the judges make their final choices among this year's potential chuunin."

\---------------

"He won!" Naruto yelled, wriggling out of Yukiko's arms to jump up and down on the seat beside her. "Iruka-san won! That's so cool! Hey, hey, he's gonna be a chuunin, right Yukiko-neechan?"

Yukiko grinned; she felt like jumping too, but she was a little too old for that, and besides, her leg would protest. "Probably, kid. It's not an absolute guarantee, but the person who wins the tournament almost always gets promoted."

"They'd better let Iruka-san get p'moted," Naruto declared, "or they stink."

"Nobody's arguing with you, kid." Yukiko turned to Kakashi. "Who else do you think will pass, Kakashi-san?"

The jounin shrugged and pulled his little orange book of erotica out of his vest. "Probably Kafunnokaze and Shinkan. Maybe Naga. Beyond that, I don't want to guess; I've never been good at predicting Sarutobi-sama, and when you throw in the Mizukage, the Master of Hidden Grass, and the Sand's representative..." He raised his eyebrow eloquently.

"Right," Yukiko said, taking his point.

"You think I might pass?" Naga asked. "I lost!"

Kakashi snorted, but didn't bother to look up from his reading. "Your last strike could have killed Kafunnokaze if you'd wanted. A shinobi has to be able to complete her mission even if it costs her life. Against a true enemy, not just an opponent, you wouldn't have won -- but you wouldn't have lost, either."

"Oh." Naga sat quietly for several seconds, contemplating that. Then she shook herself and asked Yukiko, "Want to check on Iruka? I bet we have time."

"Sure. Hey, kid," Yukiko called to Naruto, who was running up and down the aisle between the blocks of seats. "We're going to visit Iruka. Are you coming?"

"Yeah!" Naruto bounced over to Yukiko's side and grabbed her hand in an effort to pull her upright and get her moving. Yukiko stood and readjusted her grip, making sure he wasn't going to dash off and try to help Naga as well; his intentions were good, but the kid would probably knock her over instead of steadying her.

"Lead the way to the medic-nin, please," Yukiko said to Naga. Naga's lips quirked up in her cockeyed smile, and she hobbled off toward the door.

\---------------

The medic-nin had set up several hospital beds in a large, high-ceilinged room off the hallway that led between the outer entrance and the door into the arena floor. One Anbu stood guard at the doorway; he was sweating under his painted mask and had pushed the hood of his robes down to hang from his shoulders. He stared hard at Naruto, but seemed to recognize Naga and Yukiko, and Yukiko clutched Naruto's hand firmly. The Anbu waved them through the door.

Kafunnokaze sprawled on a bed just to the right of the doorway, sipping a cup of liquid and making terrible faces. His hands were wrapped in cotton mittens -- probably a burn treatment -- and his face was flushed. Iruka lay two beds further on, along the outer wall and right under a narrow window; the afternoon sun slanted across the edge of his bed. Someone had replaced his makeshift, dirty bandages with clean wrappings from his shoulders to his fingertips. Yukiko thought he looked a bit like a mummy.

A medic-nin was waving a cloth soaked in something astringent and highly volatile under Iruka's nose. The scent permeated the room; Naruto sneezed, and Yukiko's eyes watered. It reminded her of the bleach-based cleaner she used to mop the laundry room of her building, only this had traces of the sharp, green smell that rose from crushed grass, and a whiff of something sweet and greasy.

Iruka sneezed violently and knocked the medic-nin's arm away. "I'm fine," he insisted when the man frowned and raised the cloth again. "I was just dizzy, that's all."

"If he isn't dead yet, he's not going to die," Kafunnokaze added as he set his empty cup on the table beside his bed. "I know what my drugs do, even when some maniac sets them on fire, and you got the antidotes in fast enough that all we need is a day to rest. And guess what -- we're going to _get_ that."

Naga snickered. "You need it -- you're as green as your hair." Kafunnokaze grinned at her.

The medic-nin looked put upon, but he tucked the cloth into a waterproof bag, helped Iruka sit up on his bed, and didn't object when Yukiko and Naruto walked over. Naga hung back to talk with Kafunnokaze.

"Hey, hey, you won, Iruka-san!" Naruto said, bouncing on his toes; Yukiko held his hand tightly to make sure the kid didn't try to jump on Iruka, or hug him while he was still woozy. "Kakashi-baka says you're gonna pass, and that means you're gonna be my teacher! That's gonna be so cool! Um, and I promise not to sneak out of your classes -- well, not much -- and I'll pay attention, and I'll be the best ninja ever!"

Iruka smiled and ruffled Naruto's hair; the kid ducked out from under his hand, but didn't scowl the way he usually did when someone tried that. "Thank you, Naruto-kun. I'm sure you'll be a wonderful student, and if I passed, I'll do my best to be a good teacher. I have to warn you, though, that if you sneak out of my classes, I won't take you to Ichiraku ramen stand anymore."

Naruto gasped and bristled, but Iruka maintained a firm expression. Then Naruto tried looking pitiful. Yukiko rolled her eyes and started counting silently in her head. She'd reached fourteen when Iruka sighed and said, "All right, I'll take you out for ramen tonight."

"Not tonight," Yukiko said quickly. "We're all eating at Taizen-san's place, courtesy of Kakashi. You can take the kid out tomorrow. Oh, and congratulations! That was a good fight."

Iruka scratched the base of his ponytail and looked adorably confused. "Kakashi-san is taking us out for dinner? That doesn't seem like him."

Yukiko grinned in remembered satisfaction. "He made a pass at me, and I did a little fast talking. It felt good to get one up on him for once! Speaking of which, Naruto wants to steal Kakashi's book and do something colorful to it -- will you help?"

"Yeah, come on, Iruka-san, it'll be fun!" Naruto said. His blue eyes glittered with mischief and the whisker marks on his face seemed to quiver with excitement.

Iruka blushed and spread his hands. "I don't think Taizen-san's restaurant is the proper place for things like that, and defacing Kakashi-san's property is a bit different from simply dyeing his hair. I won't stop you, but I have to bow out of this mission." He sighed. "Besides, I wasn't much help the last time."

"Don't be stupid -- it was your plan! This time, you can be the distraction," Yukiko said firmly. "Just make conversation and we'll do the rest." Naruto nodded enthusiastically.

"Um. Well, I suppose it would be fun," Iruka admitted with a small smile. "All right. I'm in."

"Great!" Naruto said, lunging forward to hug Iruka around the waist. Yukiko let go of the kid's hand and watched the two boys with a warm glow in her heart. She was pretty sure Naruto had a big brother now as well as a big sister, even if he and Iruka would never put the relationship into words. There was something about the kid, something about his smile and his eyes and the loneliness underneath his bravado, that reached out and tugged at people. Once you got to know him, it was almost impossible not to want to make him happy -- and he'd do his best to make you happy in return.

The people of Konoha, Yukiko thought to herself, had no idea what they were missing.

\---------------

"Congratulations, Iruka," Naga said as she limped over to his bed. Kafunnokaze trailed after her, taking each step with great care, as if he weren't completely certain the floor would remain solid underneath his feet. A concussion and then an unknown mix of burning poisons could certainly throw off a person's equilibrium.

"Thanks, Naga," Iruka said. He levered himself off his bed and swayed slightly. Yukiko stepped forward and slid her shoulder under his. "Um. Thank you too, Yukiko. Can we get out of here now? I want fresh air and I'd hate to miss the announcement of the results."

"Sounds like a plan," Naga said. "Hey, brat, go open the door for us."

Naruto scowled. "I'm not a brat! But I'll open the door for Iruka-san, 'cause he's my friend." He walked off with his shoulders set in a posture that practically screamed his indignation.

Yukiko sighed. "Naga, please don't call Naruto a brat -- he _is_ , and I realize that, but it doesn't help things."

Kafunnokaze looked politely interested. "Is he your brother? You don't look much alike."

"Adopted brother," Yukiko said shortly as she helped Iruka walk toward the doorway. His knees seemed a little shaky, but other than that he was moving normally. She hoped he'd be able to walk without a prop by the time the new chuunin were announced; it would be embarrassing for him (and for Konoha) to fall down as he was promoted.

Naruto ostentatiously held the infirmary door and then the doors at both ends of the staircase up to the balcony. Yukiko waved Naga and Kafunnokaze on ahead of her and Iruka, just in case the kid decided to slam the door once Iruka was through. As they walked out onto the balcony, Naruto stuck his tongue out at Naga, scowled at Kafunnokaze, and beamed at Iruka and Yukiko. Then he let go of the door and ran off toward Taizen and Kakashi.

"Hey, hey, Taizen-san! What's going on?"

Taizen deftly caught Naruto before he crashed into her, and swung him up onto a seat beside her. "Hokage-sama and the Mizukage seem to have disagreed about something," she said, pointing discretely across the arena to the seats of honor where the judges were conferring. "You see how their heads are close together and the way Hokage-sama's hands are set on his cane? That shows that he is angry, and that they don't want to be overheard."

"Oh," Naruto said. He kicked his heels against the bench as Yukiko and Iruka sat down next to him. "So, so, the Mizukage's being stupid like when he thought we were cheating and stuff?"

Taizen shrugged and adjusted the fall of her long black hair. "Perhaps, although I wouldn't call him stupid. He's simply looking out for the interests of his village, the way Hokage-sama looks out for Konoha."

"I'm gonna be Hokage when I get bigger," Naruto confided. "And I'm gonna protect Konoha, but 'specially Yukiko-neechan and Iruka-san and Naga and Kakashi-baka and you, because I like you best. You're all nice."

"Same to you, kid," Yukiko said. She ruffled his hair and chuckled when he clambered into Taizen's lap to get away from her hands. Then a bell rang, quieting the audience and calling people's attention to the judges' balcony. Sarutobi-sama and the Mizukage clasped hands and bowed their heads formally to each other, after which Sarutobi-sama motioned to Hisen. The red-haired ninja vanished and reappeared in front of the control panel for the display boards, presumably ready to flash the names of the new chuunin as Sarutobi-sama announced them.

"Our decision this year was difficult," Sarutobi-sama began, "since so many of the participating genin are such excellent shinobi. They have fought well and displayed good judgment and self-control, as well as a strong respect for teamwork and an ability to innovate under pressure. We promote only the best of the best, but this year that number is high -- a favorable sign for the future of all our villages."

Yukiko wished the Hokage would skip the political speeches and get to the results. She looked over at Naruto, who was staring with rapt attention at Sarutobi-sama. "He's pretty cool for a grandpa," Naruto whispered to her, "but I bet I'll be a better Hokage. _I_ won't make stupid speeches!" Yukiko stifled her laughter and returned her attention to Sarutobi-sama's words.

"The Hidden Villages of Leaf, Mist, Grass, and Sand are pleased to announce our new chuunin: Umino Iruka of Hidden Leaf, Nagoyaka Kafunnokaze of Hidden Grass, Shinkan of Hidden Mist, Tonoike Naga of Hidden Leaf, and finally Aishou of Hidden Mist and Ayakawa Yukiko of Hidden Leaf."

Yukiko froze. What the hell?

On her left, Naruto leapt to his feet and tackled her in a strangling hug, babbling something about how cool this was and how he knew she was the best ninja. On her right, Iruka offered congratulations. Yukiko mumbled her thanks and pried the kid's arms off her neck; once she could breathe properly, she returned his hug and smiled mechanically as he jumped up and down on the bench. She felt like a wall of glass had slammed down between her and the rest of the world, distorting everything into lunatic shapes; absently, she filed that sensation for future genjutsu experiments.

This was insane. She'd forfeited! She wasn't supposed to pass!

Sweet kami, what was she supposed to do now? Chuunin couldn't retire as easily as genin -- they were more important and had to provide convincing reasons to get their names removed from the active duty lists. As a chuunin, she'd have to _lead_ missions. She'd be responsible for other people's lives -- not just because she was watching their backs, but because she'd be ordering them into danger. She'd have to leave Naruto behind, alone and unwanted.

The official instatement of new chuunin was an internal village affair, which meant that tomorrow, once the foreigners were escorted out of Konoha, she, Iruka, and Naga would go to the Hokage's tower, swear loyalty again, and receive the vests that symbolized their new rank. She could go early, Yukiko decided, and ask Sarutobi-sama to change his mind.

With that settled, Yukiko felt much better; the world stabilized around her and the glassy concentration that froze out any distractions dissolved into the jumbled roar of the crowd, as thousands of civilians tried to file out of the arena in an orderly fashion. Yukiko looked around and noticed that she seemed to be part of a small circle around Taizen. Iruka and Naga looked at her expectantly.

"What?"

"Should we have an early dinner, or should we meet at Taizen-san's teahouse later?" Iruka repeated. He was flushed with excitement but obviously trying hard to remain calm.

"Huh." Yukiko looked at Naruto, then at her teammates and Kakashi, and decided a tactical retreat was in order until she was sure the world wouldn't spin out of kilter again. She also wanted a shower. "Let's meet in two hours. And ask your aunt if she wants to come."

Iruka beamed and hurried off to the other side of the arena. Kakashi glared at Yukiko, but without much heat. Taizen seemed relieved at the delay.

"I'm going to say goodbye to Kafunnokaze, then," Naga announced, and limped away before Taizen could protest. The woman stared angrily after her daughter for a second, and then smoothed her features into their normal mask of calm.

"Why can't we eat _now_ , Yukiko-neechan?" Naruto asked as she took his hand and led him to the stairs. "I'm hungry!"

"We're giving Taizen-san some time to set up a table for us, kid, and we're giving everyone else time to go home and clean up a little. I'm sure Naga wants to change into less muddy clothing and Iruka wants to put a new shirt over his bandages. _I_ want to take a shower." Yukiko closed her eyes as she and Naruto walked out of the arena into the late afternoon sun, and savored the thought of warm water cascading over her body, washing away sweat and blood.

"But I don't need a shower. What am I s'posed to do?" Naruto asked.

Yukiko smiled conspiratorially at him. "Plan what you want to do with Kakashi's book."

Naruto giggled evilly, and Yukiko laughed as they headed through the streets of Konoha, back to her apartment building. Whatever else had happened today, the kid had agreed to be her family, and there was no way she was going to lose her family again.


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter the Seventeenth, in which Naruto proposes a novel use of hair ornaments, the author works very hard to keep Yukiko from derailing the story into a discussion of zoning permits, Kakashi suffers a mishap, the Third Hokage blows smoke rings, Iruka is terribly embarrassed, Naga wears a dress, and Yukiko gets ambushed by a happy ending.

Showers, Yukiko decided nearly an hour later, were a gift of the kami. She shut off the water with a sigh, wrung out her hair, and set about peeling off her sodden bandages and inspecting the damage. The deep gash in her left thigh oozed slightly, but the medic-nin's stitches were holding nicely. The wound in her side, however, had pulled open again; blood trickled slowly down her body, carried by the water that dripped from her hair.

Right. No more hard action for her, not until that scabbed over.

Yukiko poked through her medicine cabinet for a tube of antibiotic ointment, a jar of rather expensive healing lotion, and several rolls of loose cloth bandages. If she worked fast, she might be able to finish before Naruto got bored and charged into her apartment -- she didn't know if the bloody consequences of fights would bother him, but she wasn't particularly eager to find out.

Luck was with her. By the time her front door slammed open and shut, Yukiko was wearing her one and only dress -- it was sky blue, with embroidery around the sleeves, collar, and hem, and, in concession to the shinobi paranoia she'd never quite managed to shed, high slits up the side seams to allow free movement. She felt like a fraud in it, like a little girl imitating her elegant mother, but after asking for a chance to clean up, she thought she ought to put some effort into her appearance.

She pushed her bedroom door open and found Naruto on the futon in her main room, kicking his heels against the floor. He wore his ubiquitous orange pants, but he'd left off the matching jacket in favor of a white shirt with a hand-painted red spiral. He'd also apparently taken the time to wash -- his usually gravity-defying hair was plastered down in damp yellow spikes. "You take too long, Yukiko-neechan," he said, pouting.

Yukiko wrapped her hair into a bun and stretched, feeling the tension on her wounds and making sure her new bandages wouldn't slip or unwind. "Showers are a serious business, kid. You shouldn't rush them when you don't have to." She bent down to rummage for her civilian sandals -- they imitated ninja-style, but were made of dyed, braided leather instead of solid canvas -- which she thought she'd left somewhere by her table.

"You look weird without your jacket," Naruto told her, "and you have chopsticks in your hair. That's silly!"

Yukiko spared half a second wondering how to explain fashion to a six-year-old boy, and decided not to bother. "Yeah, it's silly, but a lot of people think it looks nice. When it doesn't really matter one way or the other, it's easier to go along with what other people expect. Besides, they're special chopsticks. They have glitter and ribbons, see?"

"Really? Cool! Hey, hey, can I have chopsticks with glitter? I could take them to Ichiraku ramen stand and show Iruka-san, and they'd look so cool, and maybe I could get more ramen 'cause I wouldn't have to use the old guy's chopsticks!"

Yukiko tried to picture Iruka's expression when he saw Naruto eating ramen with hair ornaments. She snorted. "Kid, if you can save your money for a week, I'll buy you chopsticks with glitter -- they're not cheap. Besides, the chopsticks you get at yatai are so cheap that nobody figures their cost into the meal. Having your own wouldn't get you any more ramen." At Naruto's deep sigh, she added, "You could just save a pair after you're done eating."

Naruto brightened. "Yeah! Thanks, Yukiko-neechan!"

"No problem." Aha! Yukiko grabbed her sandals from underneath her radiator, slipped them on, and turned back to the kid. "Now come here and let me fix your hair."

\---------------

Tonoike Taizen's teahouse and restaurant stood halfway between the center of Konoha and the massive village wall, on the far side of town from Yukiko's apartment building. The sun hung low on the western horizon as Yukiko and Naruto walked through the streets, casting long shadows from building to building. The warm, sweet scent of flowers rose from small parks and window boxes, and bees hummed quietly to themselves as they flew from blossom to blossom.

Yukiko found that few people seemed to recognize her as one of the new chuunin -- she supposed her dress was a better disguise than she'd expected. Several times, though, passing civilians crossed to the other side of the street and stared suspiciously at Naruto. The kid smiled and babbled as if he didn't notice, but each time he clutched Yukiko's hand a bit tighter until the hostile strangers passed by. Yukiko squeezed his fingers reassuringly.

The teahouse was impossible to miss, not because it was obtrusive -- it was, in fact, the sort of nondescript building the eye tended to skip over unless a person already knew it was there -- but because Naga was waiting outside, scuffing her feet on the pavement. Taizen had apparently forced her daughter into a white kimono decorated with lavender flowers, which Naga wore with both a distinct air of righteous suffering and a subtle awkwardness, as though she weren't quite sure how to move in a skirt.

She brightened as Yukiko and Naruto approached. "Hi! Now everybody's here except Kakashi. Come have tea while we wait for the jerk." Naruto snickered.

Naga led the way into her mother's restaurant, which seemed to be one open, spacious room. Tables lined the walls, and short, waist-high walls jutted outward toward the center of the room, covering seated shinobi's vital areas without greatly impeding their vision. The central area seemed to be a kitchen of sorts, with elaborate shelves of dry tea and delicate porcelain dishes rising to the ceiling between gleaming metal pillars. A plump woman prepared some sort of fried dessert on a sizzling grill, while a hawk-nosed man arranged fruit in elaborate patterns onto porcelain plates and carried them to a waiting party of five.

Naga threaded her way around the tables and dividers, nodded casually to several ninja -- regular customers, Yukiko assumed -- and pushed open a door in the back wall. The new room thus revealed was much smaller, with only one rectangular table. Iruka and his Aunt Sadako sat at the far end, discussing the merits of variant kunai designs with a lanky, brown-haired man in a dark green kimono; presumably he was Naga's father. An unobtrusive door in the side wall opened onto another kitchen, which looked less like a commercial room and more like part of someone's home. Just visible beyond the doorway, Taizen was busily arranging a tea set on a carved wooden tray.

"That's our kitchen," Naga said in response to Yukiko's questioning glance. "This room's for guests or groups who want privacy, so my mother cooks. Our apartment and the back alley are through there."

"Huh." The whole restaurant was interesting, from an architectural and interior design standpoint; Yukiko wondered how long it had taken to set up, and how much it had cost. "Does your family own the building, or did you get permission to remodel this floor?"

Naga twitched her shoulder. "Got permission, I think, but then we bought the building. My mother deals with that stuff," she said as Taizen pushed open the door from the kitchen. "Talk to her if you want -- just keep the brat under control. I have to wait for Kakashi."

"Hey! I'm not a brat!" Naruto grumbled, but he followed Naga and claimed a seat next to Iruka, who smiled and offered his hand for Naruto to shake. Yukiko grinned and sat next to him, while Taizen set out the teacups and claimed her own seat beside her husband, leaving one seat to Yukiko's left and the seat at the doorway end of the table for Naga and Kakashi.

Naga's father took a sip of tea and nodded across the table at Yukiko. "Hello! I don't think we've been introduced," he said. "I'm Tonoike Bashoto, Naga's father -- you've already met my lovely wife, Taizen. Welcome to our place!" His smile was slightly cockeyed, but wide and enthusiastic; Yukiko couldn't help returning it.

"Welcome," Taizen agreed. "However, I would like to lay one ground rule. Hatake Kakashi-san is reimbursing me for half the cost of this dinner, but I consider it a celebration and am happy to have you all here. Please give me no reason to regret my hospitality." A hint of steel underlay her quiet voice.

Yukiko leaned down and whispered into Naruto's ear, "That means don't do anything to Kakashi until after we leave. Sorry, kid."

Naruto pouted. "Hey, hey, when are we gonna see him again? He's not your sensei anymore, right, Yukiko-neechan? I had a really cool plan, too!"

Huh. That was actually a good question, especially if Yukiko didn't accept her promotion and went back to her semi-retired status. It would be easy to keep in touch with Iruka, and she wanted to ask Taizen's advice about remodeling buildings for business purposes -- she might be able to coax her cousin Yura into opening a restaurant in the ground floor of the building next door, if she could scrape up a big enough loan to buy it -- so she'd probably see Naga around as well, but Kakashi... well, Kakashi was a different story.

"I'll think of something," she said. "Now, say hello to Iruka's aunt, Umino Sadako-san."

That introduction was a bit strained -- the Kyuubi had, after all, killed Sadako's nephew, niece, and brother -- but all in all successful. When the elderly woman began to regale Naruto with stories of Iruka's former wild escapades, making Iruka flush crimson with embarrassment and stumble over protests that really, Naruto shouldn't take him as any sort of example, Yukiko returned to her tea with the satisfaction of a job well done. She was just going to ask Taizen how well a restaurant and apartments worked together when Naga, looking thoroughly put out, hauled Kakashi in. She shoved him toward the end of the table and sank into the remaining chair, which she hitched toward Yukiko.

Kakashi still looked exactly like what he was -- a deceptively lazy ninja -- but he had at least switched to longer, more civilian-style pants and left off his bandages. "Yo. Sorry I'm late -- I was attacked by a troop of rabid squirrels and had to detour. What'd I miss?"

Naga rolled her eyes. "See?" she said to her mother. "Don't know why we had to wait for him."

"Naga-chan..."

"Right, right." Naga twitched her shoulder, and then struggled out of her chair to help her mother serve dinner. Taizen vanished into the kitchen and passed several dishes through the door, which Naga laid on clay tiles, to keep their heat from scorching the tablecloth. Taizen's taste leaned heavily toward spicy meat dishes, with vegetables used more as a garnish than the mainstay of the meal.

Naruto pounced on the curry. "See?" he said triumphantly to Yukiko. "Not everybody eats yucky vegetables all the time! Hey, hey, why don't you cook like this, Yukiko-neechan?"

"Because."

"That's not a real answer!"

"Learn to deal with it, kid -- sometimes the world is just like that," Yukiko said, before taking a bite of garlic beef. It was good, but she generally preferred her meals with less kick, and with a higher ratio of pepper and onion to meat.

Naruto raised a chopstick and took a deep breath, but Taizen interrupted him. "Not until after dinner, Naruto-kun. For now, concentrate on eating." She paused. "By the way, Kakashi-san, is the food not to your taste?"

Yukiko, Iruka, and Naga exchanged amused glances and stared pointedly at Kakashi's ever-present mask. "You _are_ paranoid about people seeing your mouth," Naga said. "Or maybe you can't eat without making a mess?"

"Ahh..." Kakashi looked slightly nervous under the sudden scrutiny, and then whipped one of his little orange books from his vest. He snapped it open in front of his face and picked up his chopsticks with his other hand. "I was just worried about the etiquette of reading at the table."

Tonoike Bashoto blinked. Iruka sighed. Naga twitched her shoulder. Umino Sadako laughed. Yukiko clamped her hand over Naruto's mouth before he could say anything unfortunate. And Taizen calmly reached over, her motion so smooth it didn't seem to set off Kakashi's danger signals, and shoved his book down into his plate of curry and rice.

" _That_ sort of book," she said, "is never appropriate."

Yukiko caught a brief glimpse of pale skin and a jagged scar extending down from Kakashi's covered eye before the jounin grabbed his napkin and pressed it to his face. She blinked, dropped her hand, and tried very hard not burst into laughter. "Kid," she wheezed, "I think we're outclassed. Taizen-san already got Kakashi's book for you."

Naruto watched Taizen in awe. "That was so cool! Hey, hey, Taizen-san, teach me how to do that! Yukiko-neechan's teaching me to be sneaky, but she's not fast like that, and it took us _forever_ to dye Kakashi-baka's hair, and you got him so fast, and you know origami, and you're really cool, and please? I can carry stuff for you!"

Kakashi growled from behind his napkin. Taizen smiled again. "I'll think about it, Naruto-kun. Now, since that misunderstanding has been resolved, let's return to our meal."

After a minute or so of awkwardness, the conversation drifted to the new chuunin's prospects. Iruka, of course, was headed back to the academy. Naga thought she might join the Anbu. Her father objected loudly, and both Umino Sadako and, surprisingly, Kakashi, agreed with him. "Wait until you have more experience under your vest," Sadako advised. "Anbu missions are like all your nightmares squeezed together and distilled. You'd probably survive, but you need a very good sense of who you are before you dive in, or you might not recognize yourself when you come out."

Kakashi nodded. "She's right. Anbu's one head trip you don't need yet."

"But--"

"It isn't as if the Anbu will vanish if you wait," Yukiko said, trying to sound reasonable. "Besides, if you're always on secret missions, you won't get any chances to visit places openly. Why not sign up for courier missions instead?" She glanced across the table to make sure Taizen wasn't looking, and sketched the symbol of Hidden Grass in the air.

Comprehension dawned on Naga's face. "Oh. Yeah. Courier missions," she said, which was more or less the end of that argument.

Then, of course, everyone wanted to know Yukiko's plans. She squirmed, not wanting to admit that she intended to refuse the promotion and go back to her civilian life. "I don't know," she said. "I didn't expect to pass, so I never thought about it."

"Anbu," Naga said. " _You_ have a good sense of who you are -- you could tell me about it, all the stuff Dad won't say."

"Um, no." If she had a good sense of who she was, Yukiko thought, it was the sort of sense that said she _really_ didn't want to join Anbu. "But there are a lot of options, and I don't have to decide right away," she said, hoping to fend off any more suggestions.

She was relieved when the conversation moved on to speculation about the state of the truce with Hidden Mist, and what the public disagreements at today's exam would mean for missions near Water Country. That was much safer than lying about her future plans, and, Yukiko told herself, even civilians had a right to be interested in this sort of thing. Conflict between hidden villages affected trade routes, which affected prices and the availability of goods. If things got tense, she might have to raise rents to cover the higher costs of repairs, and if the worst happened and war broke out, her taxes would undoubtedly shoot through the roof.

Konoha would need good spies down in the islands. Yukiko suppressed the small voice that whispered that a genjutsu expert with legitimate civilian business connections would stand a better chance of investigating safely than more typical ninja, and that spying might actually be quite interesting. She was going to quit and take care of Naruto. There was no use having second thoughts now.

\---------------

"So, so, what _are_ you gonna do now that you're a chuunin, Yukiko-neechan?" Naruto asked as she unlocked the door to her apartment. He kicked off his sandals and followed her in, clearly not interested in trudging up to his seventh-floor room.

Yukiko untied her forehead protector and looked at it thoughtfully. He'd find out tomorrow anyway, and he deserved the truth. "Remember what I said this afternoon? There are things I care more about than being a shinobi, and if I went out on missions, I couldn't be here with you. I think I'm going to retire again."

Naruto gasped. "Hey, hey, you can't do that! You _passed!_ "

Oh, shit. If she didn't handle this exactly right, she'd have a repeat of Naruto's tantrum when she'd originally refused to enter the chuunin exam. Apparently it was one thing to convince Naruto that she thought he was more important than fighting Iruka. It was a much harder thing to convince him that she still thought he was more important when she had the chance to be a chuunin without fighting any of her friends, and to explain that being a ninja meant that she'd spend most of her time on missions, which meant that she'd have to leave him alone -- the same way he'd been alone before she'd met him.

Yukiko sat down at her kitchen table and tried to explain all that to the kid. Naruto listened solemnly but with a growing expression of stubbornness. When she finished, he scowled. "That's stupid, Yukiko-neechan. Iruka-san's gonna be a chuunin but _he's_ gonna stay here! Why can't you?"

Yukiko blinked. "Uhh..."

"And even if you go away, Iruka-san's still here, and I'm gonna be in the acad'my, and I have my own 'partment, not like when I was at Midori-san's house. So, so, it's like when I go to school, except you'd be gone longer." He looked briefly hesitant, and then added, "And you'd always come back, so that's okay. And I _know_ you're not a chicken and you like being a ninja, Yukiko-neechan! You smile more." Naruto sat back in his wooden chair and folded his arms with the air of a person who's just delivered a winning argument and knows it.

Yukiko blinked again, feeling as though someone had slammed the hilt of a kunai against the base of her head. Huh. The kid... actually had some good points. She could, theoretically, take a number of positions that didn't require much travel -- mission planning, mission analysis, interrogation, intelligence collation -- but she hadn't even considered those. That sort of thing didn't interest her. She couldn't possibly work with Iruka; nobody who couldn't demonstrate ninjutsu could handle the full load of an academy teacher, and anyway, she wanted nothing to do with hordes of screaming brats. So she'd assumed, without really thinking, that she'd be shoved into a standard mission team and sent off to all corners of the land, with no control over her schedule and no way to continue her civilian job.

She didn't want that. She _liked_ managing her building. And she wanted some stability in her life and her interaction with Naruto.

But there were other positions that could get her out of Konoha -- get her some excitement -- while still retaining some control. She'd have to negotiate carefully to get the details arranged to her satisfaction, but, yes, there were other options.

"Huh," she said aloud. "I smile more, do I?"

"Yeah," Naruto said firmly. "Like, like when you make a good deal, or you rent a 'partment, or you sneak up on me when I'm making a trap. And," he added, "if you're gonna be a ninja, you'll see Kakashi-baka and I can get his book like Taizen-san did!"

Yukiko smiled involuntarily and reached over to muss Naruto's hair. "Kid, you are something else. Don't lose that, okay?"

Naruto looked confused but nodded his agreement and let Yukiko walk him up to his room. Then she walked down one flight of stairs to the sixth floor and opened the door to the roof that held her building's water tank. The night wind whipped her skirt against her legs and ran cool fingers through her hair and along the back of her neck. Yukiko sat on the roof's edge and let her feet dangle down the wall of her building as she looked out across Konoha. Lights sparkled in the darkness as civilian families gathered in their homes, and now and then she caught glimpses of dark-clad ninja leaping from roof to roof before they vanished into the shadows.

"The difference between legendary determination and pig-headed stubbornness is whether or not you win," Yukiko said to herself, remembering what Sarutobi-sama had told her before the exam. But that wasn't the whole explanation. The _other_ difference was whether you could talk other people into believing you. The Fourth Hokage could convince a person that walking off a cliff was the right thing to do. And Naruto... well, Naruto just might become Hokage someday. 

Stranger things had happened. She couldn't think of any offhand, but she was sure it was true.

\---------------

Yukiko stood between Iruka and Naga, waiting in the Hokage's outer office, and refused to fidget. No ninja worth her forehead-protector would let herself show nerves through involuntary motion, and besides, it was beneath her dignity. Naruto, Umino Sadako, and Naga's parents were waiting outside, probably in the corridor where they undoubtedly blocked everyone's passage. Yukiko hoped, secretly, that Naruto was annoying all the clerical workers -- she was sure it was their fault that the new chuunin contracts weren't prepared yet.

She adjusted her new vest and sighed.

"Hokage-sama said this would only take five minutes," Iruka said bracingly. "I'm sure we'll be ready any second now."

Sure enough, a harried-looking genin slipped through the door carrying a small stack of papers, jerked his head to indicate that they should follow him, and opened the door to the inner office. Sarutobi-sama stood from behind his desk, his wide hat shadowing his wrinkled face, and smiled around his pipe. "Congratulations," he said. "Thank you for waiting -- now you only have to listen to me read through your responsibilities, rights, and pay schedules before you can sign and escape." He set his pipe down on an ivory stand and held out his hand for the papers.

Once the new contracts were signed, Sarutobi-sama pulled out another sheet, asked if the new chuunin had any requests for positions -- "Not you, Iruka-kun; I know where you're going, of course," -- and readied his brush and ink.

"Courier," Naga said. "Please."

Sarutobi-sama nodded and made a note. "Yukiko-san?"

Yukiko brushed her forehead-protector for reassurance and said, "Intelligence. Field operations, not headquarters."

Her teammates looked surprised, but said nothing. Sarutobi-sama noted her request, and then laid his brush aside and dismissed them. Iruka and Naga filed out, but Yukiko hung back and closed the door behind them.

Sarutobi-sama made a questioning gesture with his pipe.

"I thought this over last night," Yukiko said, "and talked with Naruto, and I realized that I do want to be a ninja. But I want to continue my civilian life as well. I thought that since I have legitimate business connections, it would be easy for me to pose as a purchase agent for my uncle and cousin's stores. That would give me an excuse to travel and ask questions, but I'd have to return to Konoha regularly. That way I'd still be able to watch over Naruto and maintain my building. And, of course, if there were any specific missions along whatever routes I take, I could do those."

She watched Sarutobi-sama's face for any cues, but he remained impassive. "Would that work, Hokage-sama?"

Sarutobi drew thoughtfully on his pipe, and blew a series of smoke rings. "That's not the typical pattern for intelligence work, but information from the business community could be quite useful. I'll pass on your suggestions to the intelligence division when I tell them of your career request, and I believe that Heika-san and Ibiki-san will be interested. Mmm. Yes, I think it could definitely work."

Yukiko released a breath she hadn't realized she was holding. Then she touched her forehead-protector again, nervously. "Um. I have one other question. Why... why did I pass? I forfeited to Iruka, and I only barely beat Akaro. I _quit_. What about that says I'll be any good as a chuunin, Hokage-sama? Why me?" Her voice rose plaintively, and she clenched her hands to keep her fingers from twitching.

"Is that what worries you?" Sarutobi-sama gestured thoughtfully with his pipe. "First, even if you 'only barely' won against Uchiha Akaro, for a genjutsu user to defeat the Sharingan is no little thing. Second, you forfeited to Iruka." Sarutobi-sama smiled. "Ask Kakashi about the bell test someday, and you'll understand what that says about your character and judgment. Third, of course, was the compromise between the Leaf and the Mist; the Mizukage wished to promote Aishou, and supported your promotion as a bribe. I believe Konoha got much the better end of that bargain."

"Huh." Yukiko considered that. Politics, luck, desperation, and some secret she'd have to pry out of Kakashi. All in all, there were probably worse reasons to promote a genin. "Thank you, Sarutobi-sama," she said, and bowed as she opened the door.

"Hey, hey, Yukiko-neechan!" Naruto pounced on her as soon as she walked into the hallway, latching onto her jacket and dancing from toe to toe. "So, so, what're you gonna do? You didn't quit, right? You're gonna be a ninja and kick everyone's butt."

Yukiko moved his fingers from her jacket into her own hand, and started walking toward the stairs. "Yeah, kid, I'm going to keep on being a shinobi, but I don't think I'm going to kick a lot of butts. I'm going to be a spy instead." She mentally crossed her fingers; the intelligence division was unpredictable, but having Sarutobi-sama on her side should help.

"A spy?" Naruto scrunched up his face, making his whisker marks crinkle. "I _guess_ that's cool. Sneaking around is fun, anyway."

"Yes, it is. And I'll get to find out what traps other villages are making, so we can make sure they get caught instead of us. It's like..." Yukiko groped for a simile, and then grinned. "It's like setting up giant practical jokes, and then sitting back to watch them work."

" _Really?_ " Naruto's eyes were wide, astonished pools of blue.

Yukiko nodded.

"That's so cool! See, see, I knew you were a really good ninja! And then you can come home and teach me! I won't play jokes on people in your building, but I can play them on people outside, right? And on kids in the acad'my -- 'specially ones who think they're cool but they're not -- and on Iruka-san, and Kakashi-baka, and Naga, but not Taizen-san 'cause she's cool, and--"

Yukiko let Naruto's excited babble wash over her as they walked into the bright morning sunlight. She had a family, she had her building, and she had her old dream back; the warmth of the sun felt like her parents smiling down on her, and Ame and Kasumi watching her back. She'd let everyone down in the past, but that was no reason to give up. All she had to do was pick herself up from the dust and try again.

Determination didn't have to be legendary to be real.

Yukiko squeezed Naruto's hand and set off into the rest of her life.


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Epilogue, in which Iruka is uncomfortably perceptive, Kakashi continues to sneak up on people, Naga is used as a threat, Yukiko pretends to juggle, and the author throws in another OC as a reminder that this _is_ a divergent universe and there were more than nine students in Naruto's academy class. Also, the author clearly needs to get some saltwater taffy before her obsession gets out of hand. *grin*

She was later than she'd wanted to be -- she'd run into a group of bandits on her way back from River Country and it had taken her two days to shake them off her trail -- but Yukiko made it home in time to lean against the sun-warmed walls of the academy and wait for Naruto to finish his first day of classes. She kicked off her sandals and sketched floor plans in the dirt with her toes. She was almost sure she had the money to modernize the building next door and convert the ground floor into a restaurant (and possibly a little shop of some sort), but she had to talk to Yura first.

Well, she could stop by her cousin's yatai with Naruto -- Yura specialized in udon, but she could whip up a bowl of ramen in a pinch, and the kid deserved a treat today.

"Yo."

Yukiko spun at the unexpected voice, and then scowled at Kakashi. "Don't _do_ that. Why are you here anyway?"

The jounin's eye crinkled into a smile. "I'm checking up on the brat," he said lightly, "and seeing how our dear Iruka-kun is managing in his new job. Speaking of which, how did your first official chuunin mission go?"

Yukiko shrugged. "Reasonably well. I brought home some long-grained rice and saltwater taffy for my uncle's store, picked off two bandits, and got floor plans and security notes for several businessmen whose dealings seem a little shady." She fished a pink-and-yellow candy wrapped in wax paper from her jacket pocket and offered it to Kakashi. "Want some taffy? I think this one is strawberry and lemon."

Kakashi eyed the candy suspiciously, but plucked it from Yukiko's hand and slipped it into his vest. "Thanks. For future reference, I prefer mocha flavor."

"I am so sorry," Yukiko said, rolling her eyes. "Vanish, would you? I hear feet and I don't think you want to deal with a horde of kids. Go bother Iruka instead."

"Point," Kakashi said, and flickered out of sight in a swirl of leaves.

Yukiko shoved her feet back into her sandals and jumped up onto the wall, using chakra to stick herself to the stones and stay well above any risk of getting trampled. And then the academy emptied. The main flood seemed to be second and third year students running for freedom -- the older kids slouched along more casually, trying to prove that they were too cool to hurry like babies. Finally the first year students arrived, all thirty-odd kids, babbling about how _cool_ it was to get their own kunai, they had _reading_ for homework and that was so unfair, and wasn't Iruka-sensei _scary_ when he yelled at Kiba for letting his puppy piss all over the floor?

"It pissed on my feet!" a brown-haired girl said loudly, her tone an interesting combination of disgust and pride at having something noteworthy happen to her. "I'm going to do something horrible to Kiba tomorrow."

"Hey, hey, I can help you!" Naruto chimed in. "I know lots about playing tricks!"

The girl looked at him skeptically. "Really? You're the boy with whiskers -- my mama says you're a menace and shouldn't have been let into the academy, and I should stay away from you. And then my papa said it would be better if you were dead." She frowned. "I don't think he meant to say it so loud. But you _have_ to be horrible or papa wouldn't have said it."

Yukiko told herself that swooping down like an avenging samurai and slapping a seven-year-old girl for having no manners would be incredibly stupid, especially when the girl's parents were the ones truly at fault. She held her breath, waiting to see how Naruto would react. "Come on, kid," she whispered. "You know you're better than that."

Hurt shone in Naruto's eyes for a second before he buried it and grinned. "Well, that means I'm really _good_ at doing horrible things, right? So, so, you should let me help you be horrible to Kiba!"

The girl cocked her head, letting her ponytail swing out past her narrow shoulders, and studied Naruto. She bit her tongue and screwed up her face in concentration, and then said brightly, "Okay! I'm Kigaru Shinnin."

"Uzumaki Naruto. Let's be friends!" He stuck out his hand.

Shinnin grabbed it and shook up and down violently. "Okay. Let's go to the park and figure out what to do to Kiba." She started running off down the path, still holding onto Naruto's hand; he stumbled after her wearing a dazed grin.

Yukiko dropped from her perch on the wall and wondered whether to laugh or sigh -- after all the trouble she'd taken to be here, Naruto rushed off without stopping to wonder where she was. Still, it was good for him to make friends. Very good. And she could wait a couple hours before taking him out for ramen.

"He's found a friend?"

"Looks like it," Yukiko said, leaning back against the wall. "Did he behave himself in class?"

"More or less," Iruka said. He walked over to stand beside her and watched the two kids run through the gate. "He fidgeted, of course, and I think he was the one who threw a paper airplane at me, but compared to Iinuzuka Kiba's puppy -- and I'm going to have a long talk with his parents about sending him to school without housebreaking that dog -- he was no problem."

" _Were_ there a lot of problems?"

Iruka smiled ruefully and scratched the base of his ponytail. "Well, yes, but it's the first day of class. There are always problems -- or so they tell me. I like it, though. They're good children, and I think most of them have a good chance of graduating on time. One or two might even make genin early."

"Huh. Early graduates." Yukiko looked at the fence around the academy grounds and tried to remember which park was closest and therefore most likely to be the one Naruto would end up in. "Twelve is still young for dealing with death," she said. "You'll teach them to be good people anyway, but we're at peace right now. There's no reason to push them." The small triangular park with the mermaid fountain was closest, but it wasn't very interesting for kids. The long stretch of grass and trees down by the stream was a better bet.

"He won't be young forever," Iruka said gently.

Yukiko blinked, and then winced. "I know, I know." She couldn't protect the kid forever; she hadn't been here this morning to see him off to class, had she? She couldn't make everyone in Konoha stop hating and fearing him. He'd have to do that himself.

"Hey," she said, forcing herself to sound cheerful, "I'm going to stop by my cousin Yura's yatai for dinner -- I know Naruto likes Ichiraku ramen best, but Yura's always up for a culinary challenge. Would you like to come along? I figure you deserve a treat too."

Iruka flushed and rubbed his scar. "Um, okay. If I wouldn't be imposing."

"I invited you, didn't I?"

Iruka turned pinker and nodded.

"Then you're not imposing," Yukiko said firmly. Then she reached into her pockets. "Here, before I forget: saltwater taffy from River Country." She dropped the paper-wrapped candies into Iruka's hands and folded his fingers over them. "Enjoy, and stop by my place at six."

She turned and walked toward the gate, and very deliberately didn't turn to watch Iruka's expression or see what he did with the taffy; there were limits on how far a person should go when embarrassing a younger brother. Yukiko smiled to herself, and then tilted her head sideways. "You can come too, but I'm not paying for you," she said lightly.

"So heartless," Kakashi said from behind her. "I think I should come just to make sure you don't scare poor Iruka-kun or the brat to death." Yukiko grinned unrepentantly; Kakashi's eye twinkled and he whipped his latest orange book out from his vest. "By the way, I hear Naga-kun is in town this week."

"Really?"

"Mmm."

"Then I'll have to invite her, to keep you from embarrassing 'poor Iruka-kun' to death, or corrupting Naruto," Yukiko said.

Kakashi raised his eyebrow. "You expect her _not_ to embarrass Iruka?"

"Point." Yukiko shrugged. "But she'll go after you too, so it should even out. Besides, I hear she's been taking lessons from her mother." She stared pointedly at Kakashi's book.

"Ah, right. I'll see you later." Kakashi hurried off, clutching his book a bit more tightly than usual. Yukiko waited until he turned the corner, counted to ten, and stopped holding back her laughter.

The afternoon sun streamed down from the clear blue sky, warming her despite the brisk air. She could smell autumn on the wind: exotic spices and oils from the restaurant districts, fresh grains and vegetables in the open air markets, the sharp crackle of fallen leaves, and a hint of woodsmoke as the butchers started smoking and curing meat from the first slaughters. Yukiko slipped her hands into her pockets and strode off, smiling to herself. She had packages to deliver to Uncle Yutaro, reports and diagrams to turn in to Heika-san, and an invitation to give to Naga. Then she had a little brother to track down and drag home to clean up -- she was dead certain Naruto would be dirty by the time she caught up with him.

She unwrapped a piece of taffy and popped it into her mouth. Huh -- watermelon. Not her favorite, but it would do. She crumpled the wrapper and tossed it from hand to hand as she walked, idly adding two illusionary duplicates so she looked like she was juggling. That was a trick more often used with kunai, to make enemies wonder which knife was real, but it was good to keep in practice. She'd have to teach the trick to Naruto one of these days; the kid could probably come up with some interesting variations.

Life, Yukiko thought to herself, was good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Final Note:** It's been ten months and 70,000 words (give or take a little), but this story has reached its end. It's kind of funny to look back and remember that I first meant this to be a one-shot, and then thought I could finish it in 7 chapters. Clearly I had no idea what I was getting into, but it's been a great trip and I'm glad you've come along with me.
> 
> Yukiko has made her journey, courtesy of Naruto's influence, and I have thus finished the story I began telling. Going much further would require starting a new story... which is, in fact, what I'm doing!
> 
> In the aftermath of the Uchiha massacre, Yukiko discovers that the reward for a job well done is a bigger job. With attendant headaches. Please join me for "The Guardian in Spite of Herself," starting in December 2005 and updated on my regular irregular schedule. :-)

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [The Way of the Apartment Manager [PODFIC]](https://archiveofourown.org/works/11864589) by [WarriorDrgnMage](https://archiveofourown.org/users/WarriorDrgnMage/pseuds/WarriorDrgnMage)




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